NEW DREAM
I was?? an intersex nonbinary goblin individual in that I was in possession of An Dick™ but I was also in possession of boobs (which i was self conscious about) BUT generally I used he/him pronouns at that point in my life. This all becomes important later.
BECAUSE every goblin had to go to these school camp things which were sorted into two discrete categories: warrior women and the Peaceful Rest or whatever. And I was perfectly willing to go into the peaceful rest!! Except shit happened and I accidentally got into the warrior line and social anxiety is a thing so i didn’t correct everyone and basically pulled a reverse Mulan
except I’d never been really any good at anything in my life, and I got good at this. I was hazed by some of the girls, made friends with others, and lowkey obtained a crush on the son of the General™ who was both terrifying and I’m pretty sure who I wanted to be when I grew up (the son and some of his friends helped out with training and they were the only boys allowed I think - I’m almost 100% sure they were being trained to be spies instead of warriors)
And I got really good at passing as a girl and really liked she/her pronouns but I was still fully aware that I was nonbinary thank you because like you don’t understand at the start of the dream I was super self-conscious of my boobs and about my gender and I was still figuring myself out and I ended up really wanting to make it work (I still wasn’t ashamed of my dick though, and in the end I forgot that I wasn’t supposed to be so comfortable in my body and that’s what exposed me)
anyway as all things do it came to an end during a relay race training exercise of some kind (which I totally owned) but through events I did not plan it was revealed that I was in possession of An Dick™ and apparently goblin society is not great with gender bc they banished me from the warrior class
I was escorted with the other drop outs into the peaceful class and i was FURIOUS like the others dropped out because the warrior classes were too tough and they couldn’t make it but I had been unwillingly forced from it
and all the peace class teachers were so CONDESCENDING like they were the people who clucked sympathetically and told us we didn’t have to be brutes anymore and that they would take care of us and all that rot and I was absolutely not having it. I was going to be a Problem Child and I think they could sense it.
And I was going to get back to the warrior side of things if it killed me. So everyone is standing in a circle or whatever singing kumbaya and I’m dropping to the ground and doing push ups while the girls who arrived with me beg me to stop and I’m out here like “nah fam I’m going to be the best nonbinary goblin warrior the world has ever fucking seen and I am going to slam dunk that fact right into the General’s transphobic face to suck it”
I don’t know I just remember the absolute resolve and anger that everything I worked so hard for, everything I proved that I could do, was taken away from me by a quirk in biology. I’d been so comfortable and happy and confident for one of the first times in my life!! I liked my body!! All of my body! And these peace teachers were trying their level best to convince me that I was never meant to fight and that my destiny had always been to be peaceful and let go of everything that ever made me happy and I hated the girls who came with me because they were all relieved they got out of the other program because it was too difficult for them but not me!!!
Then I woke up bc my mum came into my room but I hope that my nonbinary intersex goblin dream self managed to prove themself and pole vault over the wall separating the two areas and drop kick the general in the face before sweeping the general’s son into their arms and riding off into the sunset to become one of the most accomplished goblin warriors the world had ever seen
(also also kick the peace teachers in the face while they’re at it for being so condescending)
