How long do you plan on dating before getting engaged/married? Has your boyfriend talked about marriage? I've been dating for several months and I feel like my boyfriend should be thinking of proposing already but he doesn't seem to have marriage in mind for years down the road and it's kind of upsetting me.
Hi anon,
Honestly, we don’t have a clear timeline yet. Before meeting my boyfriend, I thought the ideal time would be two years of dating (at least) BUT now my view is different lol. My boyfriend actually started mentioning marriage after two months of asking me to be his girlfriend.
We are definitely praying about when we should get married and just trusting that God will provide and guide us 🙌🏻
But not everyone’s timeline looks the same - some people date for 5 years and others for 5 months before tying the knot. I wouldn’t necessarily say there is a “right time” but the time that works for you both.
I will say, if you and your boyfriend have never spoken about the end goal of dating - you should ask him. Communication is so important! Rather than assuming it’s best to just ask. It’s possible he’s been thinking about marriage too.
I wouldn’t recommend asking him when he plans on proposing or anything like that because it could make him feel rushed.
If he were to say he doesn’t see you both getting married soon, do not get discouraged - this could simply mean there is work God has to do in him to prepare him - if that’s His will. If you feel upset about it - you’re allowed to feel. But don’t allow it cause you to lose faith in God’s sovereignty! God’s will is greater than ours and His timing is perfect!
***Important note***
(1) please don’t underestimate this period - this is when you can evaluate whether or not he would be the kind of man you would submit to (Ephesians 5:22) and choose to marry - really look into whether or not he submits to God! Does he bear fruit (Matthew 7:16)? Does he have a teachable heart? Is he humble and willing to admit when he is wrong? Does he love God? Does he believe God and the Scriptures?
(2) PRAY and keep seeking God! Ask God for wisdom, He will give it to you (James 1:5)! If you want to be married, it’s important to continue to seek God - leading up to and after it happens. This is the time to keep growing in your knowledge of the Word and asking God to continue to open your eyes!
So, if you want to ask I think you should - it’s better to know than assume or doubt. I’ll be praying God will guide you guys!
Hope I answered your questions!
-s
