#goingitalone

[trouserbonanza]

Dynamic design duo - fresh out of CHCH Polytechnic a million years ago a fellow grad & I set up Bareskin Graphics to conquer the design world - I jumped ship early for a regular job but John Arcus & later Jo, sister of Anthony Wyld, stuck it for a while - I missed a cool ride - oh well, anyway... these were early ID ideas - rapidly rejected #sketchbook #sketchbookdrawing #goingitalone #missedopportunity https://www.instagram.com/p/B8mqzb9hNbE/?igshid=o6d7i8iyvyhm

[tonybrigmon]

When you think you're on your own, going it alone, you're NOT. You have an unseen Friend with you whom you will see again. Really.

Good Notes to Self (TonyBrigmon.com)

[afraid-to-whisper-blog]

... because if I don't, nobody will. . #goingitalone #onmyown https://www.instagram.com/p/Bs90HIeHKmW/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=2n97t148hp39

[thedreamingdilettante]

New on the blog: Today has been emotional with the full moon energy knocking at me as she always does I can feel the shifts. It was emotionally writing this post and I almost didn’t share it-which is why I ended up sharing it. “Sometimes even us lone wolves want someone to just see us.” #lonewolf #alpha #goingitalone #blog https://www.instagram.com/p/Bm3yx89l4xH/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=10ma4idcmi7so

[going-it-alone-blog1]

20/08/17

On my way to the first of my last shift rotation before departure. Nerves are really taking hold now. I’m anxious to get on with it as the waiting is just giving my imagination more time to come up with more rubbish scenarios. I keep thinking maybe alone was too bold of me. Maybe I need a heavier sleeping bag. And the list goes on.

The stress of making sure I have everything I need is dier and I know I’ll settle on friday morning when none of it matters anymore as if I’m without it then ill have to make do.

The weather that was looking to be good has as predicted turned to crap, rain all day. I have a feeling it’ll be like that for much of the journey.

[prinsez05]

decided to pop into the state museum (free on Friday) ~ reminder ~ Slinky was invented in Pennsylvania #freeonfriday #museum #pa #pennsylvania #goingitalone #slinky #itsawonderfultoy (at The State Museum of Pennsylvania)

[cate-by-the-way]

My #SC17 set up! #yes #goingitalone #holdonyall #Bible #Jesus #scripture

[wanderlust-girl-2015]

Traveling Solo – The fear is setting in!

So my first solo trip is in 10 days and I’m not ashamed to say I am getting more scared and apprehensive by the day.  As I type this I am sitting in my lovely little coffee shop that I live above researching where I am going a little more to try and make sure I at least have some idea of things I might want to see or things to do. I have been to Penang and Langkawi before which should make it easier or so I thought, but now I am not sure! What if I don’t meet anyone at the hostels I have booked into? What If I am a loner for all 7 days and no one talks to me or I am to chicken to talk to anyone!? What if I have some major disaster all by myself.

While in the past year I have spent substantial amounts of time on my own and I generally am fairly happy in my own company, this feels different. There is I know a part of me that is excited to try it alone as in the past I have always been with people (mainly with my ex but last year my sister and later a friend when I went to Taiwan). The organisational side I am fine with it’s the worry that if things go wrong or don’t meet my expectations what will I do? with two you can laugh it off or think of a solution as you are ‘in it together’ by myself there will be just me. Maybe it’s just reinforcing my currently feelings of being a little lonely and sad that I don’t have anyone to share these experiences with anymore.

I know I am a strong independent woman and I can do anything I set my mind too. Living in Vietnam for the past year by myself proves that in many ways I am capable of more than I ever thought. I can and have done many things by myself and still been able to feel happy and content. The problem lies that I love sharing my life with someone else. I’ve recently started to wonder how I actually feel about my ex these days as it doesn’t feel so clean cut as it used to (in the past I would have said that I still loved him and missed him more than anything). I think the change is because I don’t miss him exactly anymore I know I can do better and I want more for my life. He isn’t the same person I thought he was and maybe I’m not the same person either. Either way I think I just miss the comfort that came from being with a person I thought was my best friend and the love of my life. I miss not necessarily the big things but all the small ones that at the time I think you take for granted. I miss having someone to share all the small silly things with, such a when you see a stupid sign where the English translation is ridiculous and start to laugh and want to point it out but you can’t as there is no one there. I miss having someone at home to tell what happened in my latest class, or just being there content and happy just to chill out together with no expectations or awkward silences. Overall having someone there for highs and lows who is more than just a friend or a member of family.

Going it alone is scary and I can think of many reasons not to do it! But I will do it and I will have fun! (I need to stick to my resolution of positive thinking! Especially as it seems to be working on a whole so far this year!). Being out of my comfort zone will be a good thing in the long run. I have so many challenges ahead in my life I am sure and this is just a small one! Looking at the beautiful places that I am going also helps! Malaysia is a wonderful country and one that I have always loved! The people have always been kind, the food amazing and the scenery beautiful. Some beach time is also a massive draw as I love being by the sea as I find it very calming. I’m excited to go back to places that I liked and reclaim them! I don’t want to just think of Malaysia as a place I went to when I was with my ex I want to reclaim it as mine! My ultimate goal though is to feel as if I can travel alone and be ok (better than ok!) as this year if I can I want to explore more places in Asia that I haven’t been to and in my current situation that means probably doing it alone. Malaysia is my trial run in hopefully a straight forward and successful adventure by myself! So wish me luck!