#greer feels

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The nightmares had started again. She was only thankful that this time, Hank hadn't come rushing in.

She probably would have torn his throat out.

It started innocently enough. Just her and Will playing out in the yard; catching bugs and rolling around, chasing each other's tails. It was nice. The sun was warm, and the grass was just a little damp, enough to keep them cool. The flowers made the garden smell nice and everything was surrounded by a pleasant and consistent hum.

Then Hank came out to join them. He came and sat between Greer and Will, reaching for the bouncing baby and picking him up...

Greer gasped and shot up, reaching to pull Will away only to have the Skrull fling her aside with one arm, like she weighed nothing. Will's cries filled her ears instead of the buzzing of bees and she tried to shout but she couldn't hear anything.

Only her baby's terrified screams...

Greer woke up clawing at the sheets- if she was in her human form she would be stark white. She was panting heavily and digging her claws so deep into the sheets that feathers were coming out.

She knew Will was safe and sound in his cot, but that didn't stop Greer from checking on him anyway.

He's not coming back- he's dead. Or at least on his home planet.               He's not coming for Will.

Greer smoothed down the hair on Will's head and trudged into the living room, curling up on her armchair. She never needed much space when she slept.

If she slept...

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The morning sun shone through the curtains and into Greer's eyes, waking her up groggily, at first. Then with a start, she pushed herself up on her elbows, looking around her room. I was on the couch befo- 

                                           Pietro.

     Pietro had put her to bed. Looking over her shoulder at the empty space next to her, she sighed and got up, a small hope in the back of her mind that he has stayed.

     She moved to the couch and felt her ears drop when she noticed that the couch, too, was empty. Which brought another question to her mind.

                                Where was Jack? 

     Greer sighed again and moved into the kitchen, pulling Will's medicine from the fridge to get it ready for him. Poor baby was still sleeping the fever away, so she woke him up just to give him his morning dose before rocking him back to sleep.

     Moving slowly back into her bedroom, her paw ghosted across the sofa, a thin streak of silver hair visible in the morning sunlight. She could still smell him on her fur...

     Crawling back underneath the sheets, Greer's eyes shifted to her bedside table, and she frowned. Reaching for the pair of shades, she held them up to the light and stared. Must be Pietro's... Did he leave them here as an excuse to come back? A memento, maybe? Greer wondered if she should have left him something similar...

     Maybe she would, she thought, as she rested them on the empty side of the bed and closed her eyes, trying to imagine him there.

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There were a lot of people around. She would have preferred to do this in a more private setting, but- maybe choosing Memorial Day to do it wasn't a good decision on her behalf. Still, Greer- dressing in her civvies and looking as human as the restt of them -pushed past the crowds of people as the speeches began to start, trying desperately not to let the bouquet of flowers get squashed. Finally, a bit of breathing space. But not for long. Soldiers and veterans weren't the only one's being remembered today. Dozens, hundreds, maybe, had come to pay their respects to the boys in blue who were lost doing their civic duty. Greer 'excuse me'd' and 'sorry'd' through the crowds of people until she got to the grave she hadn't seen for almost six months, now. "Hey, baby." she smiled softly, stepping around the grave to get to the headstone. "You're looking a little dusty-" Greer laid the flowers underneath the headstone before she pulled out a handkerchief and began wiping it down, planting a kiss on Bill's name after she'd wiped it over. She sighed softly and read the headstone a few times; familiar words in familiar letters. There was a bit of a wind today, and Greer kept reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear. "I miss you, sweetheart... Every day." she told him, even though she was sure he knew. She reached up to run her fingertips over his engraved name when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around with a confused expression, smiling when she saw who it was. "Hi, Chief." "Hello, Greer..." her boss smiled at her, coming to put a hand to her waist and pull her into his side as he joined her to pay his respects. She was surprised to see him here. But they weren't alone for long. Bill's old partner- Michael, had come, along with his wife. Her own partner- Richard, had come too, as well as half a dozen who used to serve with him. She couldn't help but feel tears in her eyes. Almost fifteen years had gone by and still- Bill's memory was strong and alive. She blinked her tears away, smiling as they fell down her pale cheeks as she read the words on the headstone again. Here lies William 'Bill' Nelson. Son, husband, and devoted policeman. Gone too soon, but remembered forever.

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Walking down the relatively empty city streets, Greer pulled her scarf tighter around her neck, ebony hair blowing this way and that. The fur usually covered the cold, but even in her human form it was colder than it should have been. Greer couldn't shake the feeling that she was being watch, or being followed.

She shook her head and stuffed her gloved hands into her coat pocket, walking a little more briskly. It was almost dinner time, and Will would be waiting.

Turning a corner, Greer caught something shining in the corner of her eyes in an alleyway. That was all the time he needed, of corse, and the looming, cloaked figure seemed to materialise out of nowhere and snatched her by her coat front and yanked her into the alley.

"Hello, Greer," the familiar voice purred into her ear, and Greer shuddered, frozen from cold and from fear. "Miss me?" "In your dreams, punk." she breathed, stepping hard on his toes with her heel before throwing her head back as hard as she could to try and break his nose, but he disappeared in a split second and reappeared in front of her, punching her square in the face. Greer fell back with a grunt of pain, holding her broken and bleeding nose in a gloved hand. She went to yank off her cat's-head necklace, but someone had pulled her arms down and held them tight behind her back.

"I thought I locked you up, Parker?" she spat blood at his feet as he stepped closer, trying to wrestle her way free of his goon's grip. Her head was swimming and shed bitten down on her tongue as he punched her, so she didn't sound very threatening.

"Oh, you did. Thanks for that, by the way." He smirked as he drew in closer, taking her blood-stained chin in his hand and forcing it up; his eyes boring down into hers as they turned into those of a lizards. "But that's what's great about doing business with Osborn: he may be a psycho, but he can afford my bail."

Greer would have growled had her state allowed it: instead what came out was more of a gurgle, and she used the opportunity to spit blood into Parker's face. He jerked back, his hand coming off her chin to wipe it away, but all he did was smear it down his eye and cheek. He grinned wickedly at Greer before sucking on his middle finger, a pop echoed softly as he pulled his lips away and smacked Greer hard across the face with a backhand.

"He wants that little mongrel of yours, Kitten. You did a good job of hiding him so far, but you should have known that you couldn't hide behind your school forever."

Greer's throat sank to the pit of her stomach, and she lurched forward involuntarily, but the guy holding her up pulled her back, and she struggled against him. "Over my dead body." "Oh, tut tut, Greer... That was the wrong thing to say." Quick as a flash, Parker pulled out a gun from under his cloak and jammed the barrel into her stomach, pulling the trigger.

Greer saw the flash and heard the muffled bang before she felt anything, but instead of falling to the floor, Greer lurched forward suddenly; eyes wide with terror and claws tearing at her sheets.

She panted heavily and looked down at her fur covered legs, which were shaking a little. Looking around frantically before realising it was just another nightmare, Greer hauled herself to her trembling feet and pushed herself to Will's room, swinging the door open and taking a few steps inside before she fell to the floor in relief.

He was sleeping, safe and sound. Greer pressed a paw to her eyes and let out a silent sob, trembling softly for a minute. Just one minute, she told herself. It wasn't real, you'll be okay in a minute.

After a few deep breaths, she pushed herself back to her feet and back to her bed, leaving Will's door open just in case. She all but fell back into the bed, pulling the torn covers as far up to her neck as she could as she coiled up around herself, pulling her limbs in as tight as she could; forcing herself to try and get some sleep.

It'll be okay in the morning...

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Greer sat on her bed, running her fingers along Will's spine as he sleepily chewed the Iron Man toy that Steve had gotten him. She smiled when he yawned and blinked owlishly at her. "Go to sleep, baby. You can play more tomorrow." she encouraged him. He crawled over to her lap, curling up in a ball and resting his head on one of her knees. He blinked up at her, reaching to put a tiny paw on her leg and squeaked out a tiny "Mama," before blinking himself to sleep. She watched him with a tiny smile, running her fingertips over his little tuft of hair as she concentrated on his breathing. Sometimes she couldn't believe he was real. He was so beautiful, so perfect, so good. She couldn't believe that a little angel like him came out of such a horrible situation. She still remembered when she'd thought about terminating her pregnancy. When Osborn threatened to take him away from her. All those nights alone, hiding it, dealing with everything herself. Most women had someone with them while they were pregnant: a mother, a spouse, a friend, even. She didn't have anyone. She went through all that herself, and even though it was only a third of the time that most women went through, it was still hard. She'd never been pregnant before, and she never thought she could be, either... She could do this alone. She had planned on it initially. She could do it without Hank. But he wanted to be a part of Will's life. That made it all the more difficult. She didn't want to move Will around back and forth. She knew The Academy probably wouldn't last forever, and eventually, if Hank didn't want to come back to her he'd get someone new, and hopefully, so would she. They wouldn't be living together, and Will would have to split his time between the two of them. She didn't want that for her son. And she'd be damned if it came to that. They could survive on their own. There was a reason the male tigers never raised the cubs. If she had to revert back to her animal instinct, she would. For her son.

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Greer was on her bed playing with Will and trying to get him to eat. His last few teeth were growing out and he was getting cranky. He didn't want to eat and he didn't want to play. The only thing he did want, it seemed was Hank.

"Dada, Dada," the boy kept saying, smacking Greer's paw away every time she tried to feed him. "I know, baby, I know you miss him. Just eat something, please." "No!" he said back, crawling to the edge of the bed. Greer bit her lip and fought back tears as she reached to pull him back, dropping the bottle and holding him as he squirmed, trying to get him to calm down.

He continued to squirm for a few minutes before he finally gave up, burying himself in Greer's chest and holding onto her fur. She leaned down to kiss his head and held him close, shutting her eyes against the tears.

This is what she'd been afraid of. Hank had never wanted children, and now like it or not he had one. He had responsibilities. She didn't care about herself; that he was ignoring her or not speaking to her, but all she wanted for Will was a father figure who'd be there. And busy or lost or whatever Hank was, he wasn't there. He wasn't what she or Will needed. She felt her lip quiver a little and held Will closer, laying down with him on her bed and curling protectively around him. 

"We don't need him, Will." she whispered to him, brushing her fingertips through his hair. "All we need is right here..." 

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Reaching for hands that aren't there.

"Morning, Billy..." Greer yawned, greeting her probably still sleeping husband. They usually slept back to back. It was more comfortable that way because he twitched in his sleep. She rolled around with still closed eyes and reached out her arm to drape over his waist, but there was nobody there to stop it. Instead it went straight down into the mattress. Greer opened her eyes with a confused little frown, looking at the unslept side of her bed and sighed softly. Bill wasn't there. He hadn't been there for fourteen years. Greer shut her eyes and rolled over into her back. Today was the day. Today was the day, fourteen years ago, that Matt shot and killed her husband. Greer pressed her lips together before pushing herself out of bed. She'd already slept in and Will was probably hungry. She put her robe on and moved about the kitchen to heat up his bottle before going in to feed him; the little thought in the back of her head she sometimes got about what she'd always imagined motherhood would be like all those years ago with Bill, and realising just how lonely she really was and how lonely she had been for these years. She opened the door to see Will attempting to climb up his crib and tutted at him, reaching in to pick him up and moving them over to the rocking chair. "Big smile." she said to him, opening up her mouth for him to mimic her so she could see how many teeth he had. He had all his front teeth now up to his canines. Greer put the bottle into his mouth and rocked them gently as he ate, looking out the window. It was windy, and the leaves were starting to change colour now. It was windy that night, too, but she supposed that was just Chicago... When Will was done, Greer played with him until it was time for his bedtime. That was about six o'clock. After that, Greer started getting ready. She showered, put on a little make-up and her wedding ring. She didn't usually, but today she wanted to. She put on a black pantsuit and a peacoat over that before asking Jocasta to watch Will and deadbolt the door of her room, stepping out of her room with one last glance before heading out. The drive wasn't too long. She borrowed one of the cars in the garage and made a quick stop for flowers on the way before driving to the cemetery. She took a moment in the car before getting out and taking the familiar walk to Bill's grave. She laid the flowers in front of his headstone before leaning in and pressing a kiss to his name. She licked her lips before gnawing on her bottom one, her hands in front of her as she fiddled with her wedding ring. "Hi, sweetie... Sorry I didn't come for your birthday... I went to Chicago a few weeks ago for our anniversary. It's never the same without you there... I um. I had a baby." She said that with a little smile. "His name is William, and he's beautiful. He twitches in his sleep like you used to do... I miss you. A lot... I. I'm sorry, but... Matt got out. I tried, I'm still trying to put him back. I will." "Not talking about me, are you, Greer?" Greer's heart skipped a beat when she heard Matt's voice, and she turned around to see him emerging from the shadows of a larger headstone, smiling at her like a cat who just caught a mouse. "What the hell are you doing here?" she asked him angrily as he moved closer to her. "What, I can't visit an old friend?" "He's not your friend, you asshole. What do you want? You gonna kill me right here?" Matt shrugged his shoulders and looked around. "Seems fitting. No one's around, but then again I'd feel bad if I made you leave your son alone." Greer clenched her jaw at the mention of Will and reached out to slap him, but he caught her wrist and pulled her closer. "How old's the little tyke, huh? A year? Does he look like mommy?" Greer spat in his face and tried to jerk her wrist free from his grip, but Matt kept his grip and moved to slap her hard across the face. He pulled her close and looked down at her. "I'll get you, Greer, but not today. Maybe I'll just make you wait, make you paranoid... Maybe I'll watch you, and make myself visible just long enough for you to see, and maybe you'll see me when I'm not even there..." Matt licked his lips and tutted at her. "I do miss you. You're quite a woman, Greer. I thought about you, in my cell..." he moved his free hand to her waist and slid it down to her hip, pulling her closer. "You were a great kisser. It always burned me that we never slept together. You woulda been a tiger in the sack." "You're a pig. I would never sleep with you. Now let me go before I get really angry." "Ooh, Greer, don't be like that... I'd hate for your little friend to come out and scratch me again." He turned his cheek to her and even in the dim light she could see the three claw marks there. "I still think I'm pretty." "Well that makes one of us." Matt chuckled and pushed her away, stuffing his hands back into his pockets. "I'll see ya 'round, kid. You can bet on that." Greer watched him disappear into the shadows again. She brought a hand up to her stinging cheek and turned back to Bill's headstone. It would probably bruise. At least she could hide it from Hank. "I'm sorry, Bill. I didn't know he was following me... I'd better go. I'll come back for Christmas. Give you a kiss under the mistletoe just like you liked." Greer moved back over to kiss his name again before heading back to her car. She shut her door quickly before locking all the doors and pressing her forehead against the steering wheel. He knew about Will now. God, she was stupid. She just had to make sure not to have him follow her home, and she'd be okay... She could get through this. He didn't scare her... At least not yet.

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As soon as Greer got back to the Academy she slammed her door shut, locking it and deadlocking it before rushing over to Will's room. "Pleasepleasepleaseplease," she opened his door to find him still asleep. She choked out a sob and reached inside his crib to pick him up, crying almost hysterically now as sank to her knees and held him tight to her chest. She pulled her knees up toward her chest, keeping Will in a little bubble around her arms and legs, her chin covering his head. 

The poor baby was so confused. He tried to move out from underneath her but Greer kept him close. What could she do? She couldn't watch him 24/7 and still keep all her jobs in order. And there was Matt, too. She had to keep her case going or else he'd get her, and then Osborn would be free to take him. Her baby.

God, where did this all go so wrong? She tried so hard to protect him... She looked down at him, he was starting to cry too. "S-shh-hh," she tried to shush him through her own crying, her tears falling quicker down her soft cheeks than they would if she were in her cat form. "I'm n-not gonna l-let him ge-t you, b-baby..." She shut her eyes and felt her tears fall into his hair as his fell onto her shirt. 

What were they going to do...?