#grim.exe

[grimparadigms]

this fic is sitting at 16k and i think i'm about... 60% through it?? maybe?? i swear i don't usually write this slow.

[grimparadigms]

i have been pondering why angst is my comfort. why do i circle back to it over and over? why can't i shift my focus over to something more positive or at least neutral? why is angst my base?

and the simplest truth is that happiness is earned, never freely given, otherwise it slips right through your fingers.

[grimparadigms]

i'm actually so excited to share my writing again

[grimparadigms]

it's been a rollercoaster in terms of writing because my own life and emotional state have been in a constant flux. for once i'm pretty steady, and fractionally braver. the first tentative step back into writing is always (for me) the most terrifying. but the second step is with muscle memory, and i'm propelled forward almost always at top speed

so yes, im finally fucking writing again. crossing my fingers for no pitfalls. i've had enough cautionary tales over the years to hopefully avoid them

[grimparadigms]

not me reblogging the wrong things to this blog lmfao...

[grimparadigms]

finally time to write but sooo fuckin exhausted man

[grimparadigms]

every day of writing is just like. what am i going to freak out about today. what am i going to have to research today.

[grimparadigms]

oh my god writing this chapter in particular... like im actually on the verge of tears. i'm really hurting my feelings this time.......