TRY? Or just BE?
Quite the existential question...
Well, let me first say that for me, nothing happens without reason. Everything in life is a byproduct of what you’ve done and where you come from.
Thus
if things are within my control, why not put your stamp on everything? Right?
HOWEVER
I’ve recently come to realize that I “try too hard.” I try too hard to be everyone’s best friend and confidant, try too hard to be the best son, boyfriend, and brother, and try too hard in everything I’ve set my mind to achieve.
The result? Eventual burnout.
“Even when you are just grabbing coffee with someone you don’t stop, even for just a second,” she said to me. “Relax, just be there in the moment. And you’ll achieve much more than you would have had you kept on trying.”
Wow. Those words were freeing. The shackles came off. Suddenly I felt more connected to my own body than ever before. “You’ve been working too hard,” it’s telling me. “Rest.”
Everyone has a story to tell. My note to self? Stop and listen. Let life surprise you; let it carry you to wherever it wants.
Don’t try to be there for someone. Often, we attempt to offer advice, or even better: a solution. But just being there is the key. If you allow yourself to be present (no not the “I’m thinking of a billion ways to end your suffering as you’re talking” present, but PRESENT present), you allow yourself the opportunity to engage on a higher level. You experience their pain, you experience their joy, and maybe for that split second you become them.
THAT is not something you can achieve by trying. Only by BEING will you rid yourself of your (selfish) motives and objectives.
The world doesn’t need any superheroes, it needs people who are able to put aside their own agenda for others.