Four years ago, I saw Dachau for the first time. On January 20, 2015, I experienced Dachau again. Both circumstances were completely different experiences for two completely different individuals.
The first time I viewed Dachau I had just turned 16, and I was on a school trip for one week in Europe. I meandered through the museum located in the old office space reading every bit of information I could get my eyes on. I made my way slowly to the religious memorials, though I didn’t know what they were at the time, and experienced the crematorium and “funeral grounds” at my own, slow pace. I was one of the last people to leave the Dachau grounds on that visit and one of the few people that didn’t shed a tear.
On my second visit, I was accompanied by 25 other students, two professors, and one tour guide. I have to say, it was a completely different experience than the one I had four years ago, which is to be expected since I am four years wiser and about 20 degrees colder.
Although today was different, that isn't necessarily a bad thing. Today was extremely informative. I learned a lot about the camp that I didn’t know on my journey four years ago, such that it was all male and many of the other camps were modeled after Dachau. I also learned about the importance of propaganda during the war and the roles that concentration camps played in promoting the Nazi agenda.
Four years ago I didn’t think this information was important for my experience, and today, I still don’t think the information is necessary to truly understand a concentration camp. I almost feel like the amount of information that was thrown at me today, while informative and important for me to know, was nonessential in understanding the human struggle that occurred everyday at the camp. I felt it almost dehumanized the experience. By making it all about the information, by making it into a history lesson, it took away the emotion and hardships that occurred at the camp that any common visitor could have understood.
Four years ago I experienced a different camp than I did today. I experienced a camp without knowledge but with heart. Today I experienced a camp with knowledge and little heart. It still felt extremely powerful, and I still connected with the history of the camp and the struggle of the people that went through the area, but I felt like I had less time to cope with what I was experiencing.
I think a lot of experiences are individualistic; people need to experience things in their own way and I firmly believe a concentration camp is one of those things. I know everyone I went with back in 2011 experienced the camp in their own unique way by taking however much or little time they needed. I think a guide adds a lot to the experience, but also detracts from essential reflection time.
My last parting words are these: Even though I was freezing today, I am extremely thankful for the clothes on my back and the shoes on my feet that I, unlike concentration camp prisoners, am lucky to have.