“It’s pronounced keen-wah” I assure Rob, nervously glancing around to see if any goji berry-muching hippies have heard his faux pas. We arrive in Haad Thian keen to escape the bucket-fuelled mayhem of Full Moon Party central and discover our inner zen, or chi, or something…
However Budda was not smiling on us five hours previous, as we stood on the shore of Haad Rin, hoping to bag a long tail to take us to the remote beach promising yoga and cocktails (in that order). To our dismay, we were told with many a hand gesture (not rude ones mind), that it was too stormy to make the crossing. So like many a flummoxed traveller, we walk aimlessly, traipsing up one road, getting re-directed by a tiny Thai woman down another road. Finally we head towards a 4x4 which would take us for “good price, cheap cheap” only to discover that wasn’t the case and ended up lingering roadside hoping for some divine intervention. The answer came in the form of a Thai speaking, furious pot smoking, fellow Londoner who kept yelling ‘babe’ at me and knew the way to the beach via a two-hour jungle crossing in what is perhaps should be known as the ‘pauper trek’ considering most make the hike back when they run out of cash on the ATM-less hide-away.
Anyway back to the present. We finally arrive, ravaged by mosquitos (“What else?” As George Clooney would say) and as a reward I’ve ordered chips. Though I have admitted main course defeat with a bean burger encased in a bun that’s dryer than Ghandi’s flip flop, I’m not feeling guilty about the side order of fatty, deliciously cripsy oh-so Western and wrong chippy chips. The menu at the Sanctuary Restuarant, which unsurprisingly abutts The Sanctuary where you can get all your yoga in, has an extensive list of very healthy shakes. This, we discover, is because many of the guests are not only spending their days repeating postive affirmations and ‘ohmming’ but they are also fasting. This is probably the reason that the big fat chip en route to my mouth has suddenly become a flaming beacon and all hungry, envious eyes are directed at my indulgence.
