sorry, this is a mess and all over the place. i'm just sad(no idea why) and i really really want to cry so much
"you're not leaving, are you?" she asks, pulling her head up from where it is nestled in his chest. her soft breaths fall on his chest, and his rhythmic heartbeat, almost in cue with her breathing, falls on her face.
he scrunches up his face at her, almsot scolding her for asking such a ridiculous question. he brimgs his hand up from where it was on the couch beside him, placing it on her head, softly running his hand through her locks. he looks down at her fragile form, eyes teary and red, swollen and puffy from crying for so long. she is so vulnerable right now, almost as if one bad thing, one bad word, one wrong action, and she will break into a million pieces.
he shifts his hand to her face, rubbing his thumb across her cheek, the redness and warmness contrasting the tears that damp them. he kisses her forehead, and her eyes fall shut, and she can't describe how safe she feels around him.
"no, i'm not leaving. i never will." he assures her, and it looks like she is ready to burst into tears all over again. and he hates to see that - hates to see her broken like this. but sometimes she cries, to let all of the built up tension and frustration and heartbreak flow away. and it’s always him who is by her side when she does, and he loves it and hates it.
she blurts out immediately, her voice shaky, "but-but everyone else does" and another tear rolls off her cheek, adding one more wet patch to her pajamas.
he wipes it again, though a bit more tender this time, her skin is swollen, and he can't even imagine how much it hurts her.
he wants to cry too now. just, wants to let the tears flow and get it all out of his system, but he can't. not right now. right now, she needs him, and he will be strong, and he will be there for her. for as long as she needs him.
"i won’t. never. i will be always with you, y/n. sitting beside you on this couch, holding you close for as long as you want me to. okay?"
he searches her eyes with his, and she nods weakly. she holds him again, draping her hand across her chest and curling up with him like a koala bear. he too tightens his hold on her, wanting to keep her warm and close.
he will be with her. for and when she needs her. and if she gets tired of him, she can push him away, and he'll go away with a smile on his face, even though there's a million tears wanting to break free past that smile.