I’ve been talking to myself so loud for the past hour and a half that my dear mother just texted me to go to sleep because she can hear me talking from the other room

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I’ve been talking to myself so loud for the past hour and a half that my dear mother just texted me to go to sleep because she can hear me talking from the other room
what i need isnt a relationship its someone who cares just the right amount to keep me on edge at all times about when im gonna receive the affection i crave so when it happens it feels rewarding
been reading sherlock holmes