wait hawkfrost's turnaround??? hawkfrost redemption real???
Yes!
There are two things that bother me massively about Hawkfrost's story, and I've got fixes that are going to pinpoint both of these.
Hawkfrost inherited evil. Because he never met his father until after the journey, and RiverClan has apparently completely moved on from supporting TigerClan and wanting to murder mixed-Clan cats and is sooo sorry (i hate shadow in riverclan), it implies Hawkfrost is the problem. His death is just the removal of a 'bad apple' allowing RiverClan to Finally Have Peace. There Is No Need To Throw Out The Barrel :) No deeper systemic issue at play, here.
Evil people can't change. Born evil, died evil, continued to be evil in death. Pair this with the way the Dark Forest had no plan besides Doing Violence and the fact we only BRIEFLY spoke about redemption in the last arc, it implies he's just a ball of malice with nothing deeper.
There is actually a lot I like about Hawkfrost as a villain! But these are the two things I felt were most important to fix, so I worked with these two things as a guiding philosophy to reduxing Hawkfrost.
FIX 1: Inheriting Evil
Instead of inheriting evil, Hawkfrost is radicalized by ex-TigerClan supporters in RiverClan.
Blackclaw, Skyheart, Heavystep, and his mentor Leopardstar think there were "some problems" with Tigerstar, but hey, why throw out the kitten with the tonguewash? Thistle Law did not have the reckoning in RiverClan that it had in other Clans.
Leopardstar had a brief period of guilt after the fervor of TigerClan drained away, and in a better time, may have had a true reckoning with what she allowed to happen... but as time passed, the shame, the fear, and the repentance began to fade and she started to remember those days with some fondness.
And Hawkfrost was all those best qualities of his father, without the bad ones. Or, that's what they saw and encouraged.
The death of Hawkfrost is actually one of the most important aspects of Bonefall TNP, imo... because this time his death doesn't make the ideas go away. Mistyfoot thought it would fix it, just like the last time a Tigerkin died in a bloody and horrific way, but RiverClan is still hardening. They don't believe he impaled himself on the spike Mothwing was holding. They think ThunderClan had something to do with it.
The argument about the meeting island is brought up again and RiverClan explodes into an argument. Mistyfoot looks up at her leader begging her to stop the fighting, and the sun turns Leopardstar into a shadow
The shape of a cat lounging on top of a pile, staring down at her with amber-eyed amusement. It's the Bonehill. It's the cheering crowd. It's Stonefur's last stand all over again.
She realizes that Hawkfrost was just another type of victim; and these ideas will not die unless they are killed.
FIX 2: Evil Can't Change
Hawkfrost is able to realize he has been used.
I find this important because the redemption and death of Hawkfrost should do what Snowtuft's does, functionally, waaaay off in TBC. It shows it's possible, but the question is put off because of his untimely death to leave it open for future arcs to pick back up on.
Though it's also important to not say that Ivypool "fixed" him. It is a realization he has on his own, helped along through the way he becomes her Dark Forest mentor.
(REMINDER: Mentorships are best described as being similar to getting a third parent in this rewrite)
I'm still planning the exact order of scenes to determine how this happens, but I do have several in mind.
Ivypool's Horse
A cute moment where, as a mentor, he tries to reward her by bringing her to see the nightmares. The scene is important for several reasons; 1. horsie 2. It establishes the Dark Forest is not actually a prison to escape. It has beauty and fun in it just like any other territory. He never realized that before. 3. Shows he isn't completely lost. The bar is so low it is literally in Hell but he does consider the needs of his apprentice, more than just training a soldier.
A Chat with Leopardstar
Every day, Leopardstar is reminded of what she supported, and of what TigerClan really was like. She's demoted back to lackey status and Hawkfrost sees his proud mentor getting pushed around. Leopardstar deeply regrets a lot of things, and chats honestly with Hawkfrost about them. 1. This conversation makes Hawkfrost connect the dots that he is doing to the trainees what was done to him, though he doesn't make the connection that this is Bad yet, ("when the dark forest is StarClan we will BE their gods so it's fine. It's all for the Cause.") 2. It starts to sink in what Tigerstar does to people-- uses them.
The horrifying death of Antpelt
He did NOT know that the living could kill Dark Forest warriors. This event shakes confidence in many fighters, but especially Ivypool who experiences survivor's guilt feeling like she's the reason he's gone. 1. Suddenly there's actual stakes to this. Attacking the living could mean dying to them-- is that something he wants to risk? 2. Ivypool is distraught
Something to do with infighting
The Dark Forest demons have MANY different motivations and don't always get along. Ripplestar and Spottedpelt are being convinced to fight for revenge, Ryewhisker and Cloudberry want the abolishment of the Law of Loyalty, Clawface is a true believer in Thistle Law, Runningnose looks like he's planning something. Hawkfrost has to get in the middle of these opinions and prevent the coalition from falling apart. 1. Exposes him to new ideas 2. Shows that Hawkfrost is doing a LOT of the work of maintaining the alliance and remembering several lies at once, which is very tiring. 3. Allows Ivypool to realize he's telling people what they want to hear and trust him less, which is a blow to him.
Flametail
When he dies, the Dark Forest cats are prepared to get rid of him so he won't end up ascending to StarClan and taking their secrets with him. Tigerstar steps in and prevents this from happening. 1. THIS is the moment Hawkfrost realizes he will always be second fiddle to Tiger's first litter. "...he never would have done that for Mothwing." 2. There is no great commitment to a cause. Tigerstar is just doing whatever he wants. If he's going to just be saving random people he likes... what's the point of attacking? 3. I want this one to be one of the last ones.
As you can see it's a lot of planning about what I WANT to do. Less of an actual roadmap.