now i’m thinking about what lux said .. and like .. in a completely unhealthy way, he romanticizes death a lot . he doesn’t want to die, i guess, when it comes down to it, but he doesn’t particularly care either. what’s motivating him to get out of these places alive is the fact that he wants to see more, but more often than not that gets thrown away in the heat of the moment. he just cares about being brave and interesting. he thinks it would be a good way to go to be... killed by some kind of monster. he thinks it makes sense. like with all ?? dangerous things ... he thinks they’re interesting and the possibility of death will never get in the way of him doing what he wants to do.