#headcanons: echo.

[hellfought]

one     of     the     biggest     points     of     contention     in     the     early     stages     of     becho’s     romantic     relationship     was     the     fact     bellamy     wanted     to     cuddle    and    echo     didn’t     like     to     be     touched    when     she     was     trying     to     sleep

[hellfought]

in    light    of     what      happened     to     her    parents ,     echo    hated     fire    for      many     years .     would    shy     away     from      the     warmth    of    a    bonfire    / / /       would      pardon     herself      when      her      people     would     set      fire      to     corpses     in     an     effort      to      stop     the      spread     of     disease  .     she     was     able     to      conceal     her     aversion     of      fire      from      queen      nia     until       she     was     twelve ,      when     a     jealous       warrior       informed       their      leader       of     echo’s      weakness .

azgeda    does      not     have     room      for      weakness ,      the    queen    had    said  .      we     must     lay      this      weakness     to      rest .

for     the     next      six      weeks ,     echo     was      tortured     with      fire     daily .     thrown     into      the     dungeon ,     she     was      brought      out     only      to       face     her     fears .       forced      to     walk     across     burning    embers ,       forced      to       singe      her     own     hair ,      forced      to     burn       houses      where      disease     bred ,        forced      to     cremate      the      bodies      of       their     dead ,       forced       to      set     useless      prisoners     on     fire     --------         while     they     were     alive  .

it    was    her     own      personal     hell ,   but    it     worked  .      during    those      six     weeks ,       queen     nia      managed      to      kill      the     last      living      pieces      of     ash     buried      under      the      facade     echo      had      crafted .    

from     that      day      forward ,       echo      wasn’t      afraid      of      fire    any    longer   .

[hellfought]

BEING A SPY.      growing up without parents to care for her meant echo developed a special set of skills from a young age.    by the age of ten,  she was sneaking around on steady / silent feet and stealing whatever she needed to survive.   she had also managed to develop her fighting prowess,   her natural athleticism making it easy for her to protect herself when necessary.   these skills,  in combination with her quick feet,  made survival easier.   of course, becoming a warrior only heightened these instincts,  but it was becoming a spy that required echo to do things she’d never even considered doing.

manipulation became her new strong suit.   echo learned how to talk like the other clans,  position herself as someone not quite as strong-willed / lethal,  and otherwise blend into the crowd.   she perfected the art of getting close to someone for information alone,   only to stab them in the back at a moment’s glance.   she learned that attachment would only break her down,   that surviving would mean forsaking all others apart from her queen and her king.  

in particular,  echo was expected to use her beauty like a weapon.   she began to understand the art of manipulation based on pure carnal instinct,   her body becoming yet another tool in her arsenal.   for the most part,  sexual acts don’t really mean anything to her now  ------  they’re more of a means to an end,   a way to get what she needs before returning to her clan / her people.  

echo is good at being a spy,   just as she’s good at being a warrior.   she’s one of the best at both,  actually.    in her mind,  those two skillsets are basically all she offers to the world.    that’s why roan’s banishment cuts to her very core  ----------  this is all she knows,   all she can be.    what’s the point of surviving if her only skills aren’t of any use to her anymore?

[hellfought]

echo  starts  each  morning  with  a  run.   she  grew  accustomed  to  waking  up  at  five  am  for  a  morning  run  during  basic  training,    and  the  habit  simply  stuck  with  her.   EVEN  AFTER  SHE  LEAVES  THE  MARINES,  she  wakes  up  early,   goes  for  a  run,   showers,  and  then  heads  into  work.    later  on  in  life,   once  she  has  kids,  it  becomes  progressively  more  difficult  for  echo  to  maintain  the  routine.    with  support  from  her  significant  other,    though,    she  finds  ways  to  fit  it  into  her  busy  days.

[hellfought]

hi,     don’t     think     about     the     fact     that   touch     has     only     ever     really     represented     two     things     for     echo:     manipulation     and     death.     before     spacekru,          echo     used     her     hands     to     gain     information     for     azgeda          (    through     torture     or     sexual     acts     or     whatever     it     took,     really    )          or     to     murder     those     who     stood     in     azgeda’s     way.          she     didn’t     know     what     it     was     like     to     touch     out     of     comfort     or     simply     because     she     wanted     to     do     so.               the     first     time     someone     in     spacekru     casually     touched     her,         every     inch     of     her     body     tensed.          she     didn’t     know     how     to     handle     it     or     what     that’s     even     supposed     to     feel     like.          over     time,     she’s     learned     to     accept     it          -     bellamy     touches     her     all     the     time,     emori     threw     her     arm     around     her     in     s5,     she     holds     raven’s     hand     in     s5,     hugging     monty     goodbye,     etc    -     but     before     she     made     a     family     with     the     kids     in     space,     echo…     didn’t     really     know     what     any     kind     of     touch     felt     like     beyond     death     &     manipulation.

[hellfought]

her queen’s death was not an easy thing for echo.   even though this meant roan could return home and her lifetime of torture could subside,   nia was very much the only mother figure echo had ever known.   it was a very complicated dynamic    ---- nia stripped echo down to the barest version of herself, and then rebuilt her to become what the crown needed.   echo was tortured physically and mentally until she lost touch with the person she’d once been.   losing nia was very much like losing a piece of her identity?   the woman who,  despite all the torture,  was also the one who gave echo a home.   who took her in when she could have been left to die.   who gave her a chance to prove herself irrelevant of her past.

echo doesn’t ever really address those complicated feelings until her time on the ship.   being around the others and receiving real forgiveness,  realizing she doesn’t have to be this monstrous,  lethal version of herself in order to find a home & acceptance...   that’s difficult for her, too?   during her years in space,   she basically has to learn how to function.   how to become part of a family that’s healthy and communicates,   rather than just following orders to keep her place in it.    and it’s in that,   it’s learning who she is outside of azgeda,   that she deals with the abuse,  the torture,  and what happened with the woman she considered a mother.

this is how she gets her chance at a new beginning:   coping with the past,   accepting her new reality,   and hoping for a better future.  

[hellfought]

MOUNT WEATHER.   at her core,   echo is dangerously loyal.  she will charge straight onto any battlefield and into the face of danger for a cause she believes in.   unfortunately for skaikru,  azgeda has long been the place where her loyalty lies.   remember that echo raised herself,  an orphan from a young age,    and she didn’t have a home until the royal family began to look at her as one of their own.   for her,  destroying mount weather wasn’t about waging a war or exacting revenge.   it was about doing what was asked of her by her queen,   by her family.  

remember that the people in mount weather meant nothing to her.   at a time when tensions were high between azgeda / the clanspeople in general and skaikru,   echo didn’t have any reason to protect a bunch of people she didn’t know.    except one.

echo knew getting bellamy out of mount weather could have dire consequences.   she knew queen nia could find out about her actions and kill her.   she also knew bellamy would be furious once he found out the truth.  she didn’t care.  for her, saving bellamy’s life was paramount.   even after agonizing hours of consideration,  she knew what had to be done:    she had to save him.   you see,  in a world where trust doesn’t exist and anyone can stab you in the back (literally and metaphorically),   he saved her life.   he said he would come back for her and he did.   so even though the stakes were high and she knew it would destroy whatever seed of trust he had,   she made her choice.   she saved his life.   and she let everyone else in mount weather burn.  

[hellfought]

𝚂𝙴𝚇𝚄𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝚈.   to be quite honest,  echo doesn’t even really understand the need for labels.   grounders don’t exactly walk around labeling their preferences for men or women,   and words like bisexual, lesbian, etc. hold very little meaning for her,   if any at all.     simply put,  gender has no bearing on echo’s sexual preferences.  

more elaborately put,  echo has used her body for the sake of gaining information for azgeda for many years.   roan was the first person she slept with,  back when she was still learning about her body / what sex was in general,  but she has been with many people since then in the name of azgeda   ——   both men and women alike.   quite frankly,  sex has mostly lost meaning for her.     it’s merely an act,  one she does whenever necessary to get what she wants or needs,   all traces of vulnerability or insecurity long gone by now.

what’s difficult for echo is emotional intimacy.   she very rarely lets her walls down,   whether with men or women.  it’s nearly impossible to earn her trust,   something that takes years to do.   she’s very fair when it comes to how closed-off she is emotionally,   opening up to neither gender any faster than the other.  

what does garner echo’s attention?    loyalty.  honor.   a strategic mind.    sacrifice.   she pays very little attention to conventionally attractive traits,   but does take notice of those who believe in something and sacrifice for it.    to her,  these are attributes that are worthy of praise,   not a lithe body or nice arms or a good screw.