#hemmo69

[squilliamnylander]

hey @connor anon can u make his ring tone for your phone fruit salad by the wiggles? or the song white and nerdy? idk he seems like the dude that should have a memeish song as his designated ringtone

i agree with this

[justahockeyblog]

In case anyone was wondering how I feel about Nolan Patrick

[stevenstamkos]

Hi Steph! I'm back with some nico/nolan thoughts today. AU where it starts out in high school where nico plays in the school team and nolan is the photographer for the yearbook and they are both friends like each other but they never confess. Then they lose touch after graduating but end up crossing paths in their respective professional lives when nico makes it as a soccer star and nolan as a famous photographer. Maybe he shoots high fashion shit or games idk but point is (1/2)

nico walks into his shoot one day and nolan promptly trips over a cable/light whatever and loses his shit. Cue nolan being blushy and nico being all smiley about reuniting with his friend from school. They both get in contact again and now it’s even harder to contain their feelings for each other (2/2)

AHHHHH I’ve missed ficcing in general, since I’ve been so busy lately. I love?? non-hockey-but-still-an-athlete AUs; I usually do baseball, but Nico as a soccer player is perfect. God, I’m thinking of those pics of him playing soccer and it’s such a good image. Oooh Nolan could be one of those photographers who shoots games, but he never shot any of Nico’s team. And the first time they see each other again, it’s for a promo thing that one of Nico’s sponsors is doing, so Nico comes in as the face of the product??

He’s wearing his kit and everything, clean with no grass stains, and his hair has that floppy longish quality where whenever he runs his hand through it, it looks super soft and goes right back to its original position. He looks really good. Nolan hides behind his camera and has a stern pep talk with himself and a passing assistant thinks he’s having a talk with his camera, which. odd but you know what they say about artists, and Nolan is famous anyway so it doesn’t matter if he’s the type to talk to cameras

They definitely catch up in between the actual photographing, and Nico gives Nolan is number and they meet up for lunch and Nolan starts covering Nico’s games so he can watch Nico run like a gazelle. He has lots of pics where Nico is running with his tongue stuck out in concentration. (He might have some saved on his desktop, what)

[squilliamnylander]

I nominate crispy mcchicken's song to be fruit salad by the wiggles

[squilliamnylander]

ok ok I got one more: resident stoner noah hanifin who has definitely had the "almonds don't have titties, how do they make almond milk?" conversation while high

oh my god hjahfjebhje why aren’t we friends

also i just got another ask for “frat boy Noah Hanny” so uhhh

yeah he can get it if he shaves his fucking stubble, because he looks better when he looks like a 20 year old frat boy

and you know what? we can fuck high. i’m into it. i bet it would be some good dick. he definitely strikes me as the guy who’s just better and more fun when he’s high

Send me a hockey player that you think is ugly and I’ll tell you whether I want to fuck them or not.

[astarfilledsea]

you're from pr too??? :D

my grandma is from pr, so not necessarily me but i do have puerto rican roots

[squilliamnylander]

ily too, your blog is hysterical. What abut altar/church choir boy matt duchene?

!!!! thank you !!!! i am hilariously unfunny in real life so that means a lot to me tbh

look matt duchene can get it solely because he’s got that $6 million salary and ya girl has uni tuition and textbooks to pay for so if he could cover even like, one meal and some condoms, i would be v appreciative ok

[squilliamnylander]

last one I promise lmao what about all around american boy that would be caught fucking an apple pie dylan larkin?

smash smash smash but only if he’s clean shaven, otherwise he reminds me of my uncle yikes

and don’t apoligize omg, i love you ok? ok

Send me a hockey player that you think is ugly and I’ll tell you whether I want to fuck them or not.