#heonsa

[planetberri]

I went a bit overboard with this doodle, but ahaha @heonsa have this mess 

[genuspuella-a]

@heonsa liked for a starter!

“Do you ever just randomly crave Pizza?”

[maskedpride]

☂✎ !!

✦ SEND ME SYMBOLS & LET ME TALK ABOUT MI SON !!  | ( status :: selectively accepting ! ) 

    SADNESS —— rueful since childhood, jumin harbours a sea of many a deep-rooted doubt and underlying fear that he keeps tightly guarded in his chest ( typically that of loneliness, being taken for granted, and abandonment ; this fear is accentuated in the hollow left behind by his mother’s, rika’s and later in-game, v’s departure and the constant fear of being valued only by his wealth, status and material possessions ) with sadness being a prominent thread that ties it all together. 

      however ( more often than not, out of his own profound trust issues, his desire to not trouble anyone with his problems, and being taught throughout his upbringing that he ought to retain a cutthroat, businesslike persona ) rarely does he ever admit to being upset or otherwise discomforted. nor is he usually comfortable with being vocal about his emotions, thus garnering remarks from the other in-game characters that he’s rather “robot-like” due to this mentality. there are also instances in which he values emotions, especially his own, to be of little importance. this mindset is the result of his experience with people putting on false pretences and showing fake emotion in order to try and access his father’s wealth as well as his own, rather than caring for jumin himself as a person, for instance the women his father surrounds himself with. for this reason, jumin holds admiration towards and deeply cares for those who show that they appreciate him for who he is as a person, rather than superficially labelling him due to his status; thus, he views the other rfa members as a second family to him.  

    from a young age, he has been accustomed to bottling up his thoughts and pushing them aside, feeling the need to always keep them under control; this is evidently unhealthy, and his internal troubles, which jumin often expresses as being a tangled ball of thread in his mind, only become more and more convoluted and increasingly hard to manage as a result. however, he’s uncomfortable discussing these “threads” with others, even those who he trusts and has a good, tight-knit relationship with ( such as his father and v ) which ties back in again with just how difficult it is to get jumin to open up, as earning his trust is solely a barrier that needs to be overcome in order for him to even consider opening up to someone. even though he may trust someone, he may not ever open up to them fully.

     based on such reasons and due to both the aforementioned departure of his birth mother and rika, as well as his natural tendency to immerse himself in work ( often to the point where he’ll overwork himself and not leave time to focus on much else; he often fools himself into thinking that he’s content with this, as the company’s success rides greatly on his performance as executive director ), he is highly and unhealthily dependent on elizabeth 3rd’s companionship, despite her being feline, and clings onto the belief and hope that she understands his internal struggles and worries ( though not fully ). part of this is him finding assurance in the fact that, as she isn’t human, she therefore can’t lie to him or betray him as humans do. it is only when she goes missing in jumin’s route that he sees this as a “betrayal” of her wanting to also leave him, and comes to the gradual realisation that projecting his emotions ( and also his attachment and unreciprocated love towards rika, which the game heavily alludes to ) onto her is not the right way to handle his own internal issues, and that it differs greatly to a healthy companionship between him and another human.

     WRITING ——  in english, he writes in a script of elegant cursive that slopes a little to the right ( typically, the less sloped and the more closer together his words are, the more hastily they were written ) : accentuated curves of ink, smooth and rounded but receding to a point at the end of each pen stroke. 

     similarly, when writing in hangul, jumin’s writing is drawn out in quick, neat strokes of pen that easily flow into the next character, often appearing as though he doesn’t lift the pen from paper very often; his meticulous nature seeps into his writing, which by some miracle remains legible and near-calligraphic unless he’s stressed out or pressed for time. 

[ryuhyunn]

          @heonsa​  /  lyric starter call  ♡

         ❛   PEOPLE DON’T know you,  but i can see your HALO  --  please find where i belong,  my angel.   ❜

[artificx-blog]

♪ !!

ask kit@heonsa

♪ - music you like?   i’m into, like. rock/metal/alt/pop-punk etc. that kinda thing. but also some electronic-y stuff and then just WHATEVER TF ELSE CATCHES MY ATTENTION. i love bands like... hands like houses / bring me the horizon / young guns / digital daggers. oh but also @paintedheartbeats is determinedly getting me into kpop via actual chronological playlists so i’ve been humming constant shinee songs to myself lately. anna do u see what u’ve done

[ryuhyunn]

*. : ｡ ✧*ﾟ･ @heonsa​.

         the time is now   –   john cena.

          A QUICK  /  SWEET KISS OF LIPS where the color meets black,  where explosions of bloom  /  expand,  then contract into weighted points of UNFATHOMABLE mass,  like the center of a flower as it hungrily devours every beam of known light.  immediately drawing back,  face flushed with COLOR as hands shot up,  ever so quickly  (  god,  why is he so??  embarrassing today???  )  --

          ❛   ..ahh!!  you can't see me  --  !!!   ❜   incoherent babbling ensues.

[hercics-blog]

                dimmed bright,   tongue soft  ;   what tragedies we are,   to have lived   &   loved   &   lost    ❛   i know what it's like staying up all night nursing wounds   ❜    //    @heonsa.    (  sorry about your parents  )