At an unusually crowded session, waves of applause rained onto members of the House Ways and Means and House Ethics Committees, who held hands and bowed to their colleagues like the cast of the Broadway hit “Wicked.”
The cause for this rare display of bipartisan Congressional unity was a new resolution, which was drawn and adopted quickly, just as New York Democrat Anthony Weiner’s lewd photograph scandal began to snowball last week. According to amended House Rules for the 112th Congress, the Ways and Means Committee may now solicit product placement arrangements for the press conferences of shamed members.
In a presentation held yesterday afternoon to explain the new rule, members of the two powerful committees stood below a large plasma screen replaying the Monday press conference in which Rep. Weiner confessed to inappropriate electronic communication with women other than his wife. Fumbling for a moment with the remote control (prompting Ranking Ethics Committee member Linda T. Sánchez to whisper loudly, “You have to point it at the TV, Mr. Chairman”), David Camp (R-MI) paused midway through Rep. Weiner’s apology.
“Look there. That sip of refreshing, carefully sourced Poland Spring Mineral Water from the great state of Maine earned the American people $5,000,000.00, courtesy of Nestlé Waters North America,” Rep. Camp told an ecstatic body. “Each additional whistle-wetting is worth $1,500,000.00 against our insupportable debt.”
Pointing out what might otherwise have gone unnoticed as the embarrassed congressman on the screen deflected questions about the ages of the women who received his texts and pictures, Ethics Committee Chairman Jo Bonner (R-AL) said, “Think that microphone flag is an accident? That’s the result of a four-day bidding war between Wyndham and Starwood Resorts.” He continued, “That said, a Sheraton is more than a destination. It’s about bringing conversation back to the travel experience. Creating connections that seal deals. Forming new bonds or rekindling old friendships. Sheraton creates opportunities to connect—to home, to colleagues, and to friends, both old and new.”
Advertising Age Editor-in-Chief Rance Crain predicts that this development will be greeted with enthusiasm by the business community. “The challenge for any advertiser is engagement. Eyeballs. You can stuff creative full of Don Drapers, but when Mr. and Mrs. Main Street are more likely to own a DVR than to get a divorce, BBDO has a problem.”
Digital technology and the fragmenting of the entertainment market means there are few live media events with enough of a draw to make viewers sit through commercials. More and more major brands are pursuing innovative placement deals to create positive associations with their products. “There’s only one Superbowl per year,” said Mr. Crain. “But an excruciating press conference can happen at any time and no one can turn away. A few good ones will turn the economy right around.”
“This promises to be a major revenue stream for the United States for as long as there is a free market and there are congressmen—which is to say, forever,” said Rep. Bonner in a prepared statement. “It's just the beginning. As we learn to navigate these new waters, we’ll widen our scope. We’re already approaching new social media sites, deodorants, internet security companies, and stain removers. These are still early days.”
