I Can Hover Like No Other
I wonder if I can teach my young son to sense my disapproval over great distances.
Not for any sort of emotional abuse purposes-- I'd never use the power to nit-pick or instill a grim personality-crushing guilt complex-- I just want the little guy to be able to pick up my DANGER signals via some sort of human sonar. It would be his superpower, like a Spidey-sense. He'd never need to taste the bottom of a shoe before he finds out he shouldn't have, or pour the entire bottle of olive oil on the floor before he finds out that it really doesn't make a very good skating rink.
It could be that if we start training now, we can sharpen up his finger-wagging-parent receptors to such a degree that he'll be able to sense our warnings over whatever distance divides us. We can start with short distances, like across the room. For now I'd be quite happy if he could just feel my eyes boring into him the next time he tries to put the dog's tail in his mouth. I don't know what kind of sense organs humans have that could be altered through gene therapy to pick up such a signal, but judging from the size of the kid's head, there must be some kind of melon housed in there; if I can just learn to click and pop like a dolphin.
