Just over here in the middle of the night thinking about Eddie in that waiting room and how he pushed himself into the furthest corner possible and hid behind that magazine I’m sure he wasn’t even comprehending, because if he let any of the 118 near him, if he let them touch him or smile softly at him or frown gently, he knows he’s going to vibrate apart into a thousand pieces. Eddie who holds himself so carefully, who always has his shit together, and who’s veneer is so thin at the moment that if he lets anyone, especially Buck, get within 5 feet of him it will simple shatter into dust. Eddie who spends every breath trying to protect his son and keep the darkness at bay, who in the light early dawn is drawn almost against his will to his kid, who lets his guard down just enough to feel the warmth and safety of his home. Who can let it go just a fraction of an inch but it’s enough to let a little light in. Thank god for you kid. Eddie who holds on just a little to tight but can’t help himself. Eddie just trying to get by.
