(Long yapping— last yap before going on hiatus // tw: serious topic, mention of d34th threats)
Just want to make things crystal clear before I leave just to fully clear my head (since I keep overthinking)...
I am not a perfectly good person. But I'm trying to be good.
For as long as I can remember in Tumblr, in my 2 years experience in this app, I've been into some questionable and kinda disturbing shit, I think somewhere around 2025 or close.
While I am ashamed of some moments from my past, I want to acknowledge these actions of mine to give you an idea how 'problematic' I was before. (Again. I'm srs not proud of this.)
I used to give violent / disturbing responses to people being hateful to me and those I'm close with (friends). Going as far as sending d34th threats to someone back then. Though I can't confirm if it was an actual child, that specific user goes by the name 'Violet', who traced others and my art and also has tell other people to 'k¡ll themselves'.
At that moment, I was fighting fire with fire. Which eventually resulted to not so good effects. I remembered some people 'glorifying' how I said those nasty words to "protect my (former) friend", and it made me realize how messed up my actions were because I honestly, personally, absolutely do NOT want others to go saying d34th threats "because Hayati did it so it's fine". I remembered giving my apology, though it took me a long while to recover back to my 'normal' self. I remembered deleting my LMK blog because of how terrible I felt.
Though that was not my very first 'controversy' since I was even more problematic back in 2022 during my GachaToker era (Again, I am not proud of this era, just stating it), that 'Violet' incident definitely gave me a realization that I want to change and be better.
Idk what other 'drama' I was pulled where I was part of the problem, ig there was that 'Kai' incident (gacha h34t fan?), and then the 'Apricot' incident (the one that sent 18+ pictures)? But for those two, I just stayed away from it or blocked them rather than repeat my mistakes.
Then recently (July, I think), I once again snapped, and gave a violent response to an anon user, something related to an oc of mine, Zain, related to 'Arab culture' and such.
This one, I think is what has been bugging me since even if I did gave my apology, I can't help but think it's still not enough. I don't want to think all those months from that Violet incident in 2025 until this 2026, those months of learning how to be kinder, better and a decent person, would all go to waste because I snapped at the wrong user (anon).
Yes, I was angry. I had irl issues, and it was all bottled up (i know, it doesn't excuse my behaviour). I went to Tumblr, posted a DarkMoon content for my comfort, and when that anon gave that ask, the rage burst at the worst timing possible. I remembered even switching up to my own country's language, cursing at them (anon) in tagalog— because that's how infuriated I was.
I was angry at anon, yes. But did they deserve that much extreme violent response I gave? Absolutely not. Honestly, right now— I think I'm doing smh better, and if I could go back to that anon and give a decent response, I'd probably just say that "Zain calling Hayati 'habibi' is an inside joke between them where Hayati acts more like the man between them." and that's it. I'd feel mad, yes, but I wouldn't feel that much violent and aggressive to the ask because, to be fair, it was also calling me out because they thought I don't do research. Or that's what I think because they said "pls educate yourself"
I guess I read that specific line in a bad, disrespectful tone. Like in a "pls educate yourself 🙄😐" way, rather than a "pls educate yourself 🥹" way. And that's when I snapped.
So I want to say again— I apologize that people had to see me 'relapse'. I hate that part of myself that I'm desperately trying to take accountability by trying to act more responsible and better.
And I want to add that there actually is one more anon that mentioned "I thought you were a nice girl, but you're js immature" or something like that. I want to say, again, sorry you had to see that part of me. But understand this. I am trying to be good. I am trying to take accountability. I am trying to change not just for my audience, but for myself because I can't solve my issues if I keep having these unhealthy coping and defense mechanisms. But even if I try, also understand I have a limit.
For someone to tell me I'm "immature" because of that response without understanding my side, I mean- I can't blame them if that's what they thought, but still. It made me feel like all my efforts for almost a year just went down the drain? Like in a "I'm trying to be nice to people, and someone will think I'm decent. Then once I snap, someone will think I'm immature and that me being nice never existed."
So there's that. Before I leave, I do not want to be remembered as someone who was problematic. I know I can't control or change how people will view of me, and that's fine. But I just don't want to be remembered as someone who didn't took accountability, because I did. I apologized, I tried to be better, and most importantly, I learned from my mistakes. It may not be a perfect, emotional, with-tears apology video, but I tried my best.
I'm gonna say it again, to those that saw those terrible moments of me and got hurt & disappointed, I'm genuinely sorry. And know that I'm still, right now, trying to be better. Even when I'm off tumblr, I am still trying.
I can't say to myself if I've really did changed for the better— that's entirely up to the people to say whether there's an improvement to my behaviour or barely.
And before I go away, I'm kinda getting a sense of courage to turn on anon asks again— still VERY skeptical, but I mean, I should learn to trust that not all anons are bad-
So yeah... that's all, and have a good day / night moonlings. ♡
So, knights of guinevere pilot came out and i am obsessed with it , i can't wait to see more of it and when i heard there is a qr code in one frame that brings you to a website with 3 images, i couldn't help but look into it . I will be discusing the markings on the images and not the story depicted on the pages, maybe i ll get to that too eventually
So these are the three images in order.I have only studied the second picture in depth but from what i gather , the first one has " walk the path" written all over with red crayon while all faces are crossed out and there is a yellow crown over guinevere . Below her , on the left side ,there is a scribble that i havent been able to make out yet and on the right , it says "her fault" with a little arrow that points towards the top of the page , might be pointing towards guinevere but im not sure.
Now the second image is the one that intrigues me most , as it has the biggest amount of text . there is text printed perpintdicular to the orientation of the page and it s the entire reason im making this post. i will analyse further after getting the third image out of the way.
the third image has crowns , scribled around the page in yellow marker , while in black marker , there is the word "my friend till" over guinevere. i presume that the sentence was supposed to go like " my friend untill the end " or something like that.
OK TIME TO GET INTO THE SECOND IMAGE!!!!
i rotated it to be able to make out the text. i copied it in my notes and it's this :
Crown keep castle vassal sword scepter
pomp and on it passing plain some like
to apes dismayd and cried though many
much laughed
and laughed and laughed
and a for you royal tutor great
gout of it and an hundred thousand
swoon and then you all well up Well
now gallop forth
on your reckless.
course to move these marmel legs in pendula most plangent , , laughing sadly
Paladins triumphant ! ! Is that so it is
Now gems jubies and emeralds most
scarlets of hue the great pavilion with
cloth of gold apread like unto as it
were a monumental procession or a
coronation or scepters horns and blare
an hind leg oh
and now the hound has
goody Fair is your face and fine yet
Now , to me , this reads like an old english poem. I'm in the proccess of analysing it right now and understand what it's about. Idon't know if it is a poem that already exists or something the showrunners wrote but i am trying to see i i can track it anywhere.
when i first read it i really thought it was random words, also there are a couple of mispellings ? one is 'dismayd' and when the old english vibe popped into my head , i thought it was an old spelling but i couldn't find anything on it. After going through it a couple of times i realised that each line by itself , mostly makes sense. the way the sentences are structured combined with the line thing reminded me of old english poems i 've read (i ve read some 18th century romantic poems but i think this one is older than that)
This post will probably be updated as i continue my analysis but i am also really interested to hear other 's thoughts on this . I'm not very knowledgable about literature and the last time i analysed a text was during highschool , so i'll be really really interested on discussing it with anyone and trying to figure out what it is !!!!!!!!!!! but yea im really excited about this show and i seriously cant wait to see more and connect everything together !!!! big thanks to dana terrace , glitch and everyone who s working on this project fr!!
( i really hope i didnt make this all up and grasping at straws)
me personally i love the rb!danny & vs!leclerc secret child plotline because his glow up was something else. m frothing at the mouth like a rabid raccoon just thinking abt how how he was
so like as much as danny didn't want the "hot girl gets pregnant during the peak of her career" pipeline for little leclerc, condoms and birth control can only do much when yer pawing at each other 25/8, so ll announces one day that this is gonna be her last vsfs for a while (she gets her second fantasy bra that year) and nobody knows why until 9 months later, rbr makes a post congratulating the happy couple and saying danny jr has a seat with them if and when his maman lets him become an f1 pilot like his papa
I LOVE IT!!! OAXNLDXJ but i personally, love drama and angst and tearful reunions and pining from a distance and co-parenting aswell as jealousy. they're all my style.
so i propose: daniel and vs leclerc have a baby but for some unexplained reason, they break up. it's all a hush hush affair and nobody's the wiser that they even concieved, let alone have a seven year old baby (presumably) who's already speaking with his mama's sass and grinning like his dad.
and they couldn't keep it a secret forever. much as they have tried. eventually they're going to appear in a news gossip column as a blind item.
supermodel has a secret baby with an athlete. clue: red white blue (monaco and australian flags basically, im not very creative hashahsh)
PEOPLE START SPECULATING. fingers are thrown. tears are shed. relationships are ruined. the crowd chants in tongues. they're thirsty for blood.
on the other end of that pitchfork is daniel. he's caught in the crossfire. people are questioning him why he's never had a serious relationship after -excuse the crude language - fucking the leclerc supermodel and their split. they're asking why he's got a child seat on his car. why he's got child toys, and why his mother (two years ago) offhandedly mentioned that he's an excellent father, and she couldn't be more proud of him for his sacrifices as one?
they have been wondering why you suddenly dipped from the face of the earth.
reciepts are being pulled up. someone's going to get a hold of a birth record and a hospital bill from seven years ago. they're fucked.
it's no longer a conspiracy: it's the uncovering of one.
I can't stop thinking about the cave dialogue in which Rayan talks about Chloé, his ex wife, therefore I went back to read whole scene back from University Life episode 8, because what Rayan describes in episode 17 of LL is too diferent from that UL episode and from everything I could remember about it.
It's not to say that I caught some sort of insane discrepancy and AHÁ!
It's more because I find it interesting and I thought maybe others would find it interesting as well. So first I wanna show you what Rayan says in episode 8 of UL (which I never translated before until this post):
In my playthrough of it, back in the day, I asked him directly if he have a wife, which he answers yes first and then the proceeds to talk about it...
"And she will forever be my wife. But the last time we saw each other was seven years ago. Already… seven years… My wife, Chloé, died seven years ago. In a terrorist attack. Some savages came in shooting. No fixed target. In shop windows, in people and even in children."
"There were many wounded, and fortunately few dead. But Chloé is one of those who didn't survive… All that happened seven long years ago. It took me time. At first I didn't want to move. I wanted to keep everything, the smallest memory."
Now why I am showing this 4 panells?
This is important to understand how she died, how sad Rayan showed us to be about her death and his attachment towards Chloé.
He even goes as far to say:
"We met in high school and we got married at 23, in a hurry. We didn't tell anyone. But I'm not going to lie to you and say that everything was all roses."
Candy asks him, how so?
"We often quarreled. We stayed together for a long time, we didn't get to know anyone but each other and, sometimes, we even doubted. But when she left… I was torn apart."
Now we will never know why they used to fight, what made them marry so young and so quickly to the point where he implies they didn't even had a wedding ceremony.
Which makes this difficult to understand what compelled both of them to take such actions - maybe they they were just impulsive, but without a reason behind such impulsivity it's hard to tell if it was warrant or not.
But then, the actual panel that made me do this post in the first place eventually comes up in that same conversation with Candy:
"I loved her with all my soul. Before anything else, she was my best friend. But, sorry… I opened up too much…"
And I believe he did, regardless of anything else, because it makes sense for Rayan's character to marry someone for love.
That's the kind of "person" he is, that's why when he falls for Candy, he's ready to assume so many risks and even later talks about leaving his job for her just so they could have a less tense relationship.
This sets up him to be someone that would intensily love another person and do everything for them - they being Chloé or Candy.
I could say this is actually the point of that whole conversation: to show that he isn't someone that takes love lightly or shallowly, which helps us readers to trust his intentions and to believe that, yes, for love he would indeed be honorable, truth and passionate, instead of a player or a man that just wants to have fun with one of his students.
Not mentioning that he presents himself as a tortured soul that lost a wife tragically and never fell in love ever since, but falls in love for you, the reader, because you're special and irreplaceable, is something very flattering and, even, I dare say, romantic.
Meow meow is sad and you're the only one who can fix that for him.
Personally, I don't like how mcl writes grief, I don't think they know how to dose it without losing their hand, so it comes off as shallow for me, but I guess it serves as another thing: Chloe was loved by Rayan, but Candy needs to be special. The player needs to feel special.
Which brings us to this part of the conversation:
"Every women had something of her own. I saw her everywhere. And yet, it's been seven years. Since then, I have been unable to get involved with another woman, in a new relationship. Even in a simple friendship."
"Until… I met you. I don't know… For the first time, I met someone who has none of her. For the first time, I felt entitled not to think about her."
I understand why in an otome game is important to get the romance right and make the player feel compelled to play the character's route, after all, who wouldn't want to feel special, even if it's only on a game - that's why we have so many MCs or main characters in videogames that are heroes, that cares of others or the place they belong to.
However, I will say, maybe they should've worded it differently, maybe it's not so much about feeling entitled to not think about her, but when I realized, I wasn't searching for her traits on you, I wasn't thinking about her anymore, I was ready to move on. But this is just how I would've done it, just so it would come from Rayan the agency of the "healing" - in another words, he had healed himself before he met Candy and falling in love with her was just another evidence of that.
Which brings us back to episode 17 of Love Life, our Honeymoon episode (and pay attention to the parts that I will mark in blue):
"Y'know, I honestly didn't think I would get over losing her. And then after you got in my classroom and into my life. So, yes, I should have a star up there shining for me. Because, with you, I understood the meaning of true love. And it wasn't the same of what I had with Chloé."
"Sometimes, I think, if the story/timeline was another, if I had met you first before I met her... She and I would've been simply friends, without anything else between us. If fate hadn't been so cruel with her, it would've ended like that anyway, actually. I think she would have been happy to see me so happy these days."
"Just like I would have been in seeing her meeting someone else just as important as you're for me. And when I think of her today, is in this way: as a friend that left too soon. And that, of course, I still get a little with my heart tight. She was someone wonderful/beautiful. There's still some of her in me. But, when I met you, I was like a ghost."
Only Rayan to friendzone the dead.
"Thanks to you and our love, she just became a beautiful star, just like my father..."
At first I thought he was saying that he never really loved Chloé and that Candy made him realize that (How? Don't ask me, he doesn't say how), but thinking about this post and re-reading everything made me rethink my first impression of it.
It's not so much that he didn't loved Chloé, but admittedly, and for reasons that Rayan didn't say, he thought love was something else and he thought he loved her because of that notion, and then his notion of love changed because he met Candy and now he thinks that love is truly what he feels for Candy.
I, as someone that played all of his route, can't really say or even figure out how he would've come up with that reasoning.
Was it because for the first time ever, he had put someone else on his top priority, or at least in a more important position than his reputation and career (which he deeply cares for)? But wasn't he a passionate person to begin with? So isn't it natural for him, once he was sure he fell in love for Candy, to put her as his top priority?
Was it Candy presence alone in his life, simply being there, what made him create that notion? How she taught him that?
I don't know, because the way they fell in love was pretty quick and pretty normal I would dare say - normal not in the sense of, he was her teacher, normal in the sense there was nothing remarkable about their dates, the way they sneak around or in their conversations.
I think if he had realize that falling in love with someone new meant that he had "healed" from his past trauma, that he only had feelings for her because he was ready to have feelings for someone again and the sense of normalcy and easiness he felt in being with her was all he ever wanted after going through so much sadness and heartbreak, then, it would make more sense and sound more realistic, maybe?
But again, they wanted to spin that Candy was special, she needed to be the one that changed him, that was like gravity to him and he could not resist the pull of her.
“... It's just that, with you, I never got under the impression of playing any kind of game. Because I had a lot to lose. Before I met you, I had accepted to never love again. I didn’t want to ever risk lose someone ever again... And, above all, you came to enroll in my course. I looked up and knew that my certainties were worthless...” (episode 14 LL)
That's why I talked about his career before.
They set up Rayan to be someone that loves his work, that cares about his reputation and his career, if not, as he only thing he had since he moved away from his family and was living alone.
Risk it all for Candy was to show that he wasn't playing, he wasn't just trying to get a kick out of it.
And knowing how he got after when Marina actually got him fired, how much of a mess it made him, this put things even more in context, it shows that truly, risk it all for her was no joke, even thou, they used to be pretty reckless about it (never gonna forget their first kiss, crazy, both of them).
Which brings me to one of my favorite parts of dialogue in Rayan's route, episode 15 LL, the marriage proposal dialogue:
"It’s funny... for a long time I thought that love was like a burning fire. And I even thought that, in my case, all that was left was ashes of it. Until I met you and I understood that I didn’t know anything. That I have got it wrong in my whole life. With you, I understood that love is like a stream/flow. A wave that breaks again and again without stopping. And that drags everything wherever it goes. You imposed yourself on me like an evidence. In the calm. I knew it right away. But I only understood it this well later on."
Think that love was like a burning fire: it lights up, it shines bright, it consumes itself, then it becomes ashes and there's nothing left of it.
Ouch, Rayan. 😢
Not to mention the destructive nature of fire, but I don't think Rayan or the person who wrote this scene thought it like that necessarily, I think it had more to do with how fragile and how it consume itself, which feels more how like I would expect from how Rayan described his relationship with Chloé before: intense, too quick to think everything through, the fighting, the feeling that it wouldn't last anyway.
Meanwhile Candy is like a strong wave or a strong stream, his love for her dragged everything with it: all his reasoning, his principles and scruples, the risk of losing his reputation, his career, AND breaking again and again, because it didn't matter if he had build any walls to keep her out in the begining, she somehow brought it all down.
Two kinds of love, one feeling less truth and lasting than the other.
While it would've better, in his head, to have remain just a friendship with Chloé, with Candy, there was no way for it to have ended just in friendship, it would always be more.
You can see the contrast between his feelings for Chloé and his feelings for Candy, how it was different and the key word should always be different.
It surprised me to see him talking about their wedding too, Rayan and Chloé married young and in a hurry (we will never know why), meanwhile, Rayan found Candy in a stage of his life when love wasn't even in the table and when it finally came back to the table, Rayan wanted everything, he wanted celebrate it having a proper wedding ceremony and all.
But those are little subtle things that they left out in the air, instead of saying it so clearly like they did so many times before.
Personally, I don't think would've make any sense for Rayan's character to haven't love Chloé, considering they built a life together before he even met Candy, the same way, I don't think we could've ever thought that Rayan loved Chloé more or even the same way he loved Candy.
Cuz, Chloé and Candy not only met him in different moments of his life BUT ALSO, they totally two different women, it would go without saying it.
But I guess, they wanted to make it even more screaming that it was the case, which I can understand why.
I mean, people thought that Rayan had really tried something with Marina, outside of his route: which for those people I always told it would be impossible.
It would go against what they presented to us about him during that first dialogue in episode 8 of UL and it would represent a contradiction in the writing itself. It would bend the rules that they set themselves to follow too grotesquely. Not to mention, MCL never gave other love interests to the Lis that stayed on the side lines.
Unless, of course, they had set things up that we would understand that Marina was such a special existence is moving like Candy - which, okay, I could've accepted it, but they didn't so. That's why I was so sure of it.
Y'know, have to read so much back in his route to make this post made saying goodbye to his route so hurtful but also so fulfilling, I always loved how they wrote him, despite having my criticisms, I am happy that I got to experience Rayan's route from the start to end.
If you haven't played his route like ever, I totally I encourage you to do it now that we got it all. xD
in regard of zombie boy theory AND byler in the tunnels, I offer a vision. post- apocalyptic hawkins is in, creatures have started to move towards hawinks, and so, they have no option but to believe it´s all beacause of the gates. so even if they did want to close them, getting close would be bad enough, leading them to a way more safer alternative than the gates from hell, the tunnels. after vecna´s plan succeded, all connections came back stronger, and so did the underground tunnels, and as scary as they were, they were still more familiar to the hawkins crew. the group is divided in two, the ones who will stay on the surface, and the one who won´t. max is still weak so el and lucas stay by her side while dustin goes along to where the tunnels are, but stays up, cerebro with him so he can get any signal in case the rest need his help. that leaves our final pairings, nancy and jon, nancy gun in hand and jon on the other, hop and joyce, who have kind of the same thing going on, and finally, will and mike, will who insisted that he can use a gun, and can definetly be of use himself, and mike who, can be at will´s other hand. they take off, all in different directions. after a while of walking around and trying to find something, mike speaks. I forgot how encapsulated it felt to be down gere, I can barely breath with this mask. will snorts behind his own mask. well, you were the one that told everyone to use one, nancy said she got back from the upside down without having a full body protection. mike keeps walking by his side. well, yeah, because she´s nancy, but- he stops walking. what if we don´t need them? he says carefully. huh? asks will. I mean, we could try gets some fresh air. will shakes his head. I don´t think this is the time to take off your armor gear- he gets interrupted by mike backing him up against the tunnel walls. look, let me. michael says as he goes to grab will´s face, moving his googles up and his mask down his chin, putting his face to view, then doing the same with his own. so, can you breathe? will can definetly breathe mike´s breath on his own now, so, tricky question. mike stares, will starts to move away. yeah, I can. let´s go back. Ive breathed enough and I´m sure we´ll find nothing. mike watches as the shorter boy goes back to where they came from. he fucked up. shit. out of nowhere, his latern starts blinking, will´s far by now. will! wait, my- shit. the batteries must´ve run out. he goes to grab a lighter, last time he was here the group light up some torch, he made sure to remeber that, maybe he could do the same now. but bad luck is on his side, the lighter keep going off and there´s no way he can get the torch on now. will! he shouts again. the, he almost can´t hear it, a familiar growling, almost unheardable under his own screaming. the torch light up now, as well as a strange presnece behind him. carefully, he turns around. in the light he can see it, the demogorgon, high and mighty in front of him. shit! he whispers. and before he can get snatched by the beast standing by his face, he feels his body get turned downards by something- no, someone else. in no second time he´s on the floor, and as he looks up, there´s no demogorgon, but will standing above him. will stands his ground against the monster, who keeps growling. will...mike stutters. the demogorgon roars. he keeps himself there. but he´s scared, god, is he scared. he backs up and trips into mike. still holding his rifle, the beast goes back between screaming at him and shutting his flowered mouth. will holds the gun strongly. go away! he screams, mike´s terrified face behind him. almost as if it understood. the mosnter starts to back away doubtfully until they eventually no longer see him. will? mike calls, panic on his voice. he grabs will, who´s still seating between his legs, by the shoulders crafelly. changes position so he can look at his face. he grabs it. puts the protection back on and starts to lift him by the shoulders. let´s go, he says, still in shock. will is too. he thinks, what the hell just happend here?
everybody, will the wise;the prince of the upside down
ok but honestly considering that one of st’s inspirations was alien, this actually tracks
I know different interpretations of a work are generally enriching and cool... but c!dream villan interpretations is like how to tell me you only watch Tommy without saying you only watch tommy.... which would be fine but its not a great place to be making statements about the whole nature of the dsmp lol
Wild speculation, but sometimes I wonder if like, because the dsmp didn't really start as a narrative, and a lot of fans don't nessecarily enter it expecting a narrative, but then there is one and the fandom is really discourse heavy and everyone is sort of excpeted to have an opinion while maybe not expecting to form one from the begining or not having a ton of experience with narrative in a way that would "expect" them to have an opinion or not take things at face value??, I don't know if I explained that well at all... and I don't really even think thats right nessecarily... but like wow sometimes some of the takes about power and government and villany...
Honestly, it makes sense!!!
I think something interesting is like.... looking at how animatics have shaped the like tone and culture of the fandom essentially. Like, an interesting fact that I didn't really fully grasp until SUPER recently is like...
c!Wilbur out the gate admits he is manipulating c!Tommy. Like his first youtube video on the Dream SMP he admits his goal is to manipulate c!Tommy and people like c!Tommy into helping him achieve a potion ("drug") empire to monopolize on potions because there were a lot of people on the server who like to min-max, which is to put all of your effort into this one specific skill essentially. so like... i know minecraft doesnt have a skill tree but if it did, it would be putting all your points into that one specific branch of a skill tree. So he wanted to exploit the labor of all the TommyInnits to.... maintain a Potion Empire.
THIS IS A LONG POST BC I GOT CARRIED AWAY SO BUCKLE UP
And I don't think a lot of the fandom who joined later on knows this. I certainly didn't until like a week or so ago? Like... I knew c!Wilbur had been manipulative from the start because I'm a mod of (shameless self promo incoming) @dsmpanalysis and we have a lot of different POVs in that mod team and discord and we talk about it really frequently. I joined the fandom as someone who was really big on L'manburg ESPECIALLY crimeboys, and have turned into.... *gestures vaguely to my blog*
And ngl I owe a lot of it to @1-michibiki-1 in terms of c!Dream "Apologism" but all of the mods there have expanded my thoughts and views on the storylines of this narrative.
My application consisted of like largely essays about like... how I think Dream was the villain but he was meant to be the villain because you don't get any insight into his character WHICH.... IS A FAIR ASSUMPTION AT FIRST GLANCE. People are easily villainized when you cannot get a glimpse into their thought process. It's easy to dwindle someone down into this flat character and starting out I knew Dream didn't stream the SMP on purpose.
And I personally came to the conclusion of "Oh! So Dream is supposed to be the villain." However as the story continued and I learned more about what Dream went through I began to realize that... it's more than likely a form of a red herring. My opinions on this were immediately solidified when I watched Ranboo's 2 MIL stream because both Ranboo AND Dream agree on enjoying red herrings.
There have been MANY times were Dream has said that c!Dream is a complex character and he's not a wholly evil guy and there have been times where the narrative has honestly just proved that.
Anyways, what's important though was that... I learned most of this from other people who were more focused on c!Dream rather than myself. Eventually I shifted from c!Tommy to c!Ranboo and c!Techno after c!Tommy betrayed c!Techno and I began to realize.... everything I learned before hopping in wasn't exactly what it seemed.
Part of this is because I'm older, I heavily identify with c!Techno's sense of loyalty and philosophies on government, but I especially identify with the anguish c!Techno voiced in... a lot of lore but especially the lore around Doomsday.
I'm not 16 anymore. I don't always feel wronged by adults, or older people in my case, whenever they absolutely have done something wrong by me, but I do feel wronged by my close friends. I also felt like c!Tommy's sense of loyalty didn't line up with mine after what felt like him constantly flip-flopping and refusing to understand c!Techno's morals on government didn't line up with his.
In short, it was easier to identify with Tommy in these animatics versus in the actual stream content because c!Tommy is played by a 16 year old. I'm not a teenager and my line of thinking doesn't entirely line up with people that age anymore. It's harder to place myself in the same shoes of someone's OC who is played closer to their actual age, because I'm not that age.
Regardless, I was still on the c!Dream is a villain train. I wasn't ever like... c!Dream is repulsive I hate him, but I was like omg hot villain lad go brrr.
Even when the first like... mellohi, panic room, Ranboo lore stream popped up I thought "Oh! c!Ranboo corruption arc?"
And I was excited because I really wanted this shy, nervous character to turn into villain buddies with his good pal c!Dream. I'm a total sucker for villains and corruption arcs and all that good shit.
SO I STARTED GETTING REALLY INTERESTED IN ENDERSMILE. I'VE BEEN ON ENDERSMILE SQUAD OUT THE GATE. NOT THE SAME WAY I AM NOW, BUT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED THEM TO TEAM UP.
So... upon not really keeping up with c!Dream and being relatively??? indifferent? I don't think I started arguments on c!Dream back then, but I might have. But I remember like... starting to participate more whenever c!Dream came up and looking more into Dream's character BUT ESPECIALLY TALKING WITH OUR SERVER'S C!DREAM SPECIALIST MICHI ABOUT DREAM A LOT MORE.
And because Michi has been a watcher since day one and was a DTeam fan rather than a SBI fan, she was able to provide me with more information on how the server worked pre-Tommy but especially pre-Wilbur.
Now, you could definitely argue well Michi probably has clear bias but it made sense to me when I looked back on how the storyline had been constructed and was going along, and everyone in the server talks a lot about our own biases and how we want people to maybe not lean so hard on them. Michi would also provide like anecdotes on what had happened and I'm sure links were probably provided at one point but the point was I felt like Michi had no reason to lie or manipulate how the story was told and if she did, eventually someone would have pointed it out because... Group of like... right now it's around 20 or more analysts but I don't remember how many at the time there were. POINT BEING, WE'VE ALL GOT POINTS TO PROVE AND IN MY EXPERIENCE NOT MANY OF US HAVE BEEN SHY TO PROVE THEM.
So if anyone ever had any differing opinions they would be talked about and we literally had and still have discussions.
REGARDLESS.... I DIDN'T FACT CHECK IN DEPTH BECAUSE I THOUGHT PEER REVIEW WAS ENOUGH WHEN YOU HAVE LIKE HOURS UPON HOURS OF STREAMS TO WATCH.
Anyways. Eventually I started paying closer attention and looking more into c!Dream lore but only recently have I started to triple check before speaking about c!Wilbur lore because I know everyone has biases and while I did trust everyone's thoughts and analysis in the discord, whenever I make essays I typically like it to be largely air tight and if theres a mistake, I want it to be because I forgot not because I just trusted what was said. Plus, I wanted to get down to the specifics of how Wilbur had always started with manipulation on the mind.
SO I WATCHED HIS FIRST VIDEO ON THE DREAM SMP.
AND WHAT I WAS NOT BY ANY MEANS EXPECTING WAS WILBUR TO SAY WORD FOR WORD, VERBATIM,
"SO WHY DON'T I START AN INDUSTRY WHERE I USE THE TOMMYINNITS OF THE WORLD TO WORK FOR ME, TO CREATE THINGS THAT THE MIN-MAXERS OF THE WORLD WILL WANT."
Like... this is in no way an attempt to like hardcore villainize c!Wilbur like everyone does Dream, it's just more so to like REALLY outline how far off a lot of fandom interpretation of c!Wilbur is....
Because of SBI focused animatics.
Now, when I joined I watched A LOT of animatics that really highlighted like... Wilbur being this self-loathing JD-esque, "I destroyed it because I had to because the world was against me because no one loved us, Tommy" type of character. At least... that's what it came across as.
And it definitely highlighted the fact that Tommy was a victim, which he is. He is undoubtedly a victim and no not even any dream apologist can change my mind otherwise. Tommy, despite being an instigator sometimes, didn't deserve the abuse he received.
But these animatics never shown the fact that c!Wilbur started L'manburg as a shady ploy to exploit people like c!Tommy and vilify c!Dream so he could have power.
And that was easy because Dream and Tommy had wars before. They had spars and pranks and here's the plan to take back my disks and here's the plan to out smart the thieving little child etc etc.
And all of the animatics I watched never mentioned this. Neither did the recaps though. The recaps gave the events flat out, there didn't sound like there was bias, and honestly I don't really know if there was rather than like... a lack of nuance. And it's hard to provide a recap with that much nuance in a short period of time for a youtube video, to be perfectly fair.
However, this creates a perfect formula for entirely rewriting the history of a server. c!Wilbur quite literally fucking succeeded TO A META LEVEL. He slandered and ran smear campaigns against Dream and like he even does that with Sapnap in the beginning. But what's crazy is that it transferred over into the meta! Most of this fandom understands Wilbur as a victim of mental illness, and yeah maybe? He definitely wasn't mentally well by the end of pogtopia, but he never started out with honorable intentions. L'manburg was never a victim, only its citizens. The TommyInnits of the world.
I just think it's like... such an interesting case study. Because this is like... an opinion like shared by at least half of the fandom, but the vilifying of c!Dream is shared by MOST of the fandom I would argue. Which is like even more crazy for me because that was c!Wilbur's goal!!!
LIKE I GO INSANE WHEN I THINK OF THIS BECAUSE HIS REACH IS JUST TOO POWERFUL. HE'S NOT EVEN ENTIRELY REAL, JUST A MANIPULATIVE PERSONA OF SOME BRITISH GUY.
And I mean... maybe people who have watched Wilbur's video on the SMP still maintain this idea that Wilbur wasn't always the bad guy, but honestly... I wouldn't be surprised if their introduction was still an animatic. Like bias is hard to check and I'm not going to lie I could have sworn I watched both Wilbur's AND Tommy's video on the SMP in the beginning and yet I STILL was a ride or die for tragic yet on some level still honorable Wilbur and a resilient Tommy.
Like... upon watching Wilbur's first video... possibly again I was surprised because I thought I did watch it like right before I even started watching the streams and yet I was still so invested in c!Wilbur as this tortured anti-hero.
It took 6 months of... not being in an echo chamber, full of multiple different people of different ages, different stream POVS, and people who joined the fandom at different points in time.
IDK IF THIS WAS EVEN ENTIRELY RELEVANT IT JUST FELT TANGENTIALLY RELEVANT AND THIS WAS SOMETHING I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT FOR A HOT MINUTE AFTER LIKE WATCHING WILBUR'S FIRST VIDEO AGAIN.
TLDR;
SBI CENTRIC ANIMATICS HAD A LASTING AFFECT ON THIS FANDOM AS IT'S HARD TO GO BACK AND ACTUALLY CHECK THE NARRATIVE FOR SOLID FACTS FOR YOUR OWN INTERPRETATION BASED ON THE FACT THAT THIS NARRATIVE SPANS OVER HUNDREDS OF HOURS WORTH OF TWITCH STREAMS.
Okay so I read Lost Legends: The Rise of Flynn Rider and general thoughts? It was cute and fun, and I have gripes here and there but I can still recommend it. I don't want to compare it to WOWM because it's like apples and oranges but Lost Legends wins points for me by actually acknowledging the TTS storyline and characters, even though it's kinda brief and not quite as... entertaining.
And before I go into the in-depth spoiler review I'll jot down a few thoughts here: there's a lot to be said about tie-in media and 'canon', but where I think it becomes contentious is where two pieces contradict each other, and whether those contradictions necessitate a canonical hierarchy or cancel something out completely. And the reason I'm bringing this up is because while LL borrows TTS lore it also contradicts it? which is. ironic.
but i'll get into that. Spoilers ahead
Basic Summary of The Plot
Our story starts at the Dark Kingdom, with a short prologue. It's all stuff we already know from the series: King Edmund tries to grab the moonstone, his wife dies, Eugene gets sent away for his own safety. What's funny is that Ms Queen still doesn't get a name, but her Lady in Waiting/Handmaiden gets a name (Maeve), and it's Maeve who really drops the ball on dropping Eugene off at an orphanage instead of raising him as Prince Horace. Go girl give us nothing
And from here the LL timeline begins, as Eugene and Arnie are now twelve year olds (I think?) in an orphanage in Corona. Which is the first contradiction to 'canon' but shelve that thought for now. Eugene and Arnie are good little boys but they're getting too old to keep hanging around and the orphanage needs money for the evil Tax Man, so they decide they'll go off into the world and send some money back when they're rich off their famous adventuring. What happens instead is that The Baron's circus rolls into town (yes that Baron) and Eugene and Arnie decide to try their luck signing up for that gig.
To prove themselves to the Baron, Flynn and Lance have to perform a hazing ritual a heist. The heist is literally just to buy a key from the Weasel but it plays out as this huge dramatic thing with a guard chase which is eternally funny to me because two kids walk into a bar, buy a key and then leave, and it's treated like fucking ocean's eleven. The Stabbingtons try to betray them (those guys are here too) but Flynn and Lance outsmart them, beginning a rivalry for the ages. Also, the pub thugs are all part of the Baron's circus crew. Don't think about it too much.
Anyway, as this has all been going down, Eugene is really interested in getting to talk to this guy with a tattoo of (what we as the audience know is) the brotherhood symbol, which Eugene recognises from the note left with him as a baby. He wants to talk to this dude in the hopes he'll get a clue about who his parents are, but this dude keeps eluding him. He also hasn't had a chance to tell Lance about this yet, so when Lance finds out about it he assumes Eugene only tried to rope him into the circus so he could find his parents and ditch him. Cue an ongoing silent treatment.
Eugene eventually does talk to this guy and he learns that the Brotherhood symbol is from the Dark Kingdom but the Dark Kingdom is gone so he shouldn't bother looking for it. Bummer. And now the Baron is planning a huge heist of the reward money for the Lost Princess' return, and Eugene is getting cold feet. He's been okay with a little bit of thievery so far but this feels like too much for him, and he's not okay with pulling it off but Lance still won't talk to him.
As the plan unfolds, Lance and Eugene reconcile and then they work together to betray the Baron and return the stolen treasure that they stole back to the King and Queen. They get caught by the Baron, escape, then get caught by the guards, but it's okay because they're presented to the King and Queen and when Eugene explains that they felt really sorry about it and promise not to do it again they're let go. And so the story ends on a high note.
My Thots™
Okay so here are the thoughts
Canon Compliance?
The obvious takeaway here is that this story offers you a beautiful pie in the form of the characters you know and love and the established lore, then shoves the pie in your face with things like "Eugene already knows the Dark Kingdom and the Moonstone exist but he never brings this up" and "Eugene betrays the Baron in a very significant way but somehow they'll make up and he and Stalyan will get engaged". Which means that if the integrity of the series is important to you, you'll probably just mentally cross out Eugene knowing about the Brohood/DK/Moonstone.
And imo that's fine! My own approach to this story is a kind of general 'if it works it works, if it doesn't I'll leave it' thing to work my own headcanons around. Because there's a lot of fun things to pluck from, like a new ex-Brotherhood member and other characters that could pop up from Eugene's past and other worldbuilding details.
The Story
The story was pretty short and obviously very tailored towards a younger audience, but it still felt kind of... slow? Mostly because nothing particularly exciting is happening until the big heist and even that feels pretty underwhelming. And of course I don't expect a story like this to be particularly complex and can appreciate its simplicity, but I felt like if it had been longer there could have been more twists to keep things interesting.
For example, the Baron is set up as a character not unlike Gothel, who lavishes praise upon the boys and goes on about how they're 'family' but is obviously just manipulating them and would throw them to the wolves in a heartbeat. Eugene underestimates just how criminal the Baron is, but at no point in the story does the doubt we have in the Baron's sincerity ever amount to anything- Eugene only turns against him because he has a morality crisis, which I'll get to in a minute.
Misc. Thoughts
Okay so one thing I thought was really cute was that each chapter has a little 'quote' from a Flynnigan Rider book, and I wrote them all down so if you've read this far and want me to post those separately lemme know. Anyway I just thought it was a very cute touch.
An honourable mention goes to every time Stalyan shows up, she doesn't really do anything in the story yet still is somehow the only character holding the brain cell. Rapunzel gets an indirect cameo by Lance and Eugene stumbling upon her tower and going "Whoa that's Crazy. Anyway. " which is amazing, and Cassandra even gets a little mention by the Captain! And to answer the question nobody asked, there's a chameleon running around Corona because she's an escapee from the circus, and Pascal's mom's name is Amélie!
Characters - okay really just Eugene
Eugene/Flynn is the title character of the book and we get the story exclusively from his POV, so there isn't a lot to say about Lance. On the one hand while I can acknowledge that this is a story about Flynn, not Lance, there's a few choices that feel like a missed opportunity at best given that this book really was an opportunity to explore Lance's character in a way the series never really does.
And it feels extra egregious when the plot demands conflict between Eugene and Lance, because while the emotion between them is engaging when it's happening, at other times it just feels like a convenient way to shove Lance offscreen again. (As a side note, as contrived as the conflict is these are also two twelve year old boys so. Can't blame em too much).
Also, Eugene coming up with the name "Lance Strongbow" on Lance's behalf while he's unconscious is one of those backstory things I'm not going to be acknowledging, thank you.
The Robin Hood Dilemma
Something I touched on after reading What Once Was Mine is that Eugene's characterisation prior to the movie isn't something writers seem to really like... dealing with. And it kind of makes sense that the author received a lot of characterisation notes from Chris Sonnenburg, because little Flynn does feel very similar to the Eugene we know; only the Eugene we know is an adult man who has since grown out of his Flynn Rider persona. But the Flynn Rider persona he needed to grow out of isn't something that ought to be cast aside entirely!! Stop being cowards!!
Taking a step back, the whole premise of the book is kind of a paradox- because Eugene needs to become Flynn Rider before he can learn to embrace his authentic self, but Flynn Rider isn't hero material, he isn't a good guy, he's not the right protagonist for a story for kids. So what we get isn't Flynn Rider, it's really just Eugene trying on a new name. That works for the beginning of the story, because he is just Eugene trying on a new name, but he doesn't grow into it.
At the beginning of the story, Eugene is an orphan in a poor but still functional orphanage run by a kind old lady, and he is surrounded by nice little boys. Eugene is motivated to leave and get a job by a desire to send funds back to the orphanage, and when he joins the Baron's circus he's taken aback to learn he's among thieves. Here's where I thought: okay, this might get interesting. We might be getting a G-rated 'angel falls from heaven' story about Eugene being morally corrupted by the Baron, of learning that the world outside is tough and he needs to look out for himself first and foremost-
but no. The Baron shares his plan to steal the reward money for the Lost Princess, because all the people he's surrounded himself with are already criminals who don't give a shit, but Eugene thinks that this is going too far! What about that poor lost princess who people need an incentive to search for? (he's like, projecting about his own parent issues which is fair, but still). And so the story ends with Eugene turning on the Baron to return the money to the "right" people (aka the king and queen of a kingdom?? okay) but he takes a single golden egg for himself so he can send it to the orphanage.
Which is all sweet and nice but. He still has to become Flynn Rider, asshole extraordinaire. He still has to lose his morals to the point where he'd take an inexperienced young woman to a pub that he, in this book, recognises is a dangerous place in the hopes that he can ditch her. He still has to go and become a wanted thief and rejoin the Baron and then ditch Stalyan on their wedding night.
The reason I'm going on about this so much is that the appeal of Eugene to me is that he is this good guy who wants to be a better person for the people he loves, but that means recognising that he has behaviour he needs to change, and his development is meaningful for that. Watering him down to a righteous Robin Hood hero does him a disservice.
Warnings: SPOILER ALERT, swearing, teeny bit of gore, insecurities, I probaby butchered his character >.< I´m so sorry, baby
A/N: NACHT APPEARS IN TODAY´S EPISODE SO OMG I HAD TO POST THIS!!!!
okay so
Nacht is my second favorite Black Clover character and yes, I am currently: freaking out. also he has Dabi´s VA so: perfection.
I will definitely post more about him in the future! I just wanted to get this out today since it just fit so well <333 I´ll be back to regular posting in April
You didn´t think that you would ever be able to feel peace again and go back to your normal life after the attack of the Diamond kingdom.
And yet here you were, in the calm after the storm.
It was weird. Everything was in chaos, the villages and overall buildings were even more destroyed than when the eye of the midnight sun attacked.
Everything was as per usual at the Black Bull´s base, nothing out of the ordinary except for Yami forcing Nacht to stay now.
You´ve known him for a long time now, being the first member of the squad, and you never could read him. He always intrigued you.
And yet he also always made you distance yourself from him.
Nacht was the type of guy who was too blunt for his own good. You appreciated honesty, but he just always made it hurt.
You knew full well that you weren´t an innocent little lamb, but who was?
What irked you most about him was how badly he thought and spoke about his own squad, to this day you asked yourself why he even joined in the first place, he could´ve just as easily denied Yami´s order.
Sure, Yami could be persistent, but that wouldn´t stop someone like Nacht.
There had to be more to the two of them but over the years you learned that you just didn´t want to know.
Every time you approached Nacht about it he just shut you off and reminded you of all your flaws again.
Like he always did. With everyone.
Except for Asta, like everyone, he took a liking to the little guy.
Though, you had to admit Nacht seemed more open and approachable after the war. And yet you didn´t.
Instead you watched him at first reluctantly, over time without any hesitation, becoming rather friendly, talking to the rest of the squad.
In all those years you have known him you always asked yourself whether you really did. You highly doubted it.
You just couldn´t figure him out. Did he just wear a mask? Were all of his infuriating smiles for show? Was it all a game to him? What were his goals?
And why…
No. You didn´t want to think about that.
What was the point anyway? Anyone got a crush at some point, the only difference was that crushes usually didn´t last this long.
Especially if said person didn´t pay you any mind unless they were insulting you.
Nacht mostly stayed to himself, making it known he didn´t want anything to do with the rest of the squad.
Though like anyone else who stayed with them for a long amount of time, he warmed up to everyone.
Still, he had his moments and didn´t exactly change his opinion. Because in his world people couldn´t change, they just didn´t.
And that made you sad.
Because deep down you just wanted him to acknowledge you, to tell you that you weren´t as bad as he thought, that you were a good person.
But at one point being around him just hurt. You cared too much, thought too much about him, it kept you awake at night.
If only you went out of your room into the kitchen where he would stay because of the same problem.
Especially since that day…
You were surrounded. Everywhere you looked you saw black, greedy eyes. The devils were everywhere and all hope seemed lost. You couldn´t rely on Asta only anymore, he already went through enough. He shouldn´t fight your battles for you just because he had strong powers, he was just a little boy.
And yet there he was, fighting ferociously, once again defeating the devil that came to slay everyone that day all those centuries ago.
It was hard to keep at least somewhat of an overview, everything seemed in shambles and the screams and cries of everyone were deafening.
You really shouldn´t be focusing on Nacht right now, now was not the time. Not that there ever was an appropriate time for that anyway.
But of course you just couldn´t help yourself, your eyes wandered to him frequently even as you told them to stop.
Though in this instance it might have not been that bad.
Your eyes went wide as you realized what he was about to do, everything around you faded away, you felt numb and your body moved on its own to prevent him from going through with his plan.
“Please die with me” were the last things that left his lips that shut your brain off and made you move automatically. They weren´t uttered to you, Nacht didn´t even look in your direction, it was none of your business.
Even still you couldn´t just stand by idly and watch him die, watch one of the only chances you had at winning die, watch the man you hated to love die.
The little devil on his shoulder looked scared as your gaze met him and honestly, you could understand it all too well.
You were scared too but now wasn´t a time for fear, you needed to stop him at all costs.
“That´s the stupidest thing you ever said!” you screamed out as you were still running towards him.
Finally his head turned to you, he still had that infuriating smile on his lips, though it was so sad this time.
“It´s the only way…” he replied.
“You don´t know that! You can´t know that! You can´t just throw you life away like that, it won´t change anything! In fact it will… we will lose. We will lose so much more than just the fight, don´t you understand that? You´re not more or less important than the rest of us and you´re our vice captain, so it´s my duty to stop you from sacrificing yourself!” you said, grabbing his shoulders and frantically panting, you looked at him aghast, shocked, eyes wide and searching for something...anything in his eyes that wasn´t dull.
“Then we´re all going to die, but it´s so typical of you to be so selfish” he told you, his tone as entitled as always.
“You´re selfish too, you know that?” you whispered, averting your eyes.
“You can´t just run away from your responsibilities. It isn´t right” you stood your ground, balling your fists in anger and frustration.
“It´s the only way, why do you even try to stop me?” he sighed, looking at you. He was feeling quite frustrated now too, what were you trying to achieve? If he didn´t make this sacrifice so many more people would die, didn´t you care about them? Wasn´t it your job to protect everyone? So why were you trying to desperately to save him out of all people?
“Because I care. A lot. We all do. And yes it´s selfish, you´re right about that. We´re all selfish losers and assholes but you know what? We do it best and we´re goddamn proud not to be as picture perfect as all the others. That´s what defines us. And you don´t have to agree with that, but I´m fucking stubborn so don´t think for even a second that I´ll let you go through with your stupid plan!” you looked at him with such emotion, such passion, it made his heart ache with a foreign familiarity.
Nacht never paid you any more mind than he did the others, just thinking all of you were useless. That was why he was so surprised that someone would voluntarily want to save him.
He treated you like shit, sure it was more out of a defense mechanism cause he couldn´t bear leaving people behind, having people worry about him, he already had enough guilt to carry.
But hearing your words was like a revelation to him.
Maybe he still had a role to play in life, maybe his story wasn´t over yet and just maybe could he live his life without having to fulfill anything, but solely for himself and the ones he cared about.
Maybe it was finally time to start caring more than he was ready to admit, to take a step into the unknown and discover it with…
You.
It had always been you, he realized as he saw your desperate face, your hands on his shoulders, all dirty from fighting and yet feeling warmer than any fire ever could.
“Yes, maybe living might not be that bad” he tilted his head, smiling at you.
You felt an intense amount of relief wash over you as you gave him an exhausted smile back.
That was the first time you ever smiled at him, Nacht would never forget that moment, the moment in which you broke down his walls without even knowing it.
He would have to thank you later for that, when he fully comprehended what that meant.
Asta and you were training together again outside while the others were inside going on about their daily ruckus. Some were on missions already but some, like Asta, who were wounded and exhausted still needed to rest properly.
Though it was no use. Asta would never rest like he should unless he was knocked out.
And you tried that the first week, you each took turns but eventually you just couldn´t keep up anymore and let him train like he wanted.
Nacht also kept training with him, though he himself was new to everything going on and needed time to properly accommodate to things.
You stretched a bit, sitting down to just enjoy the sun for a moment.
“I can´t wait to go on missions again! I´m as good as new, I´m ready, I promise!” Asta beamed and showed off a bit but you only sighed.
“It´s not my call, kid” you apologized.
Asta pouted and kept training.
“You got a mission” Yami announced as he joined you outside and Asta practically jumped up and down with excitement and energy.
“Just the usual, rebuilding a town and fighting some magic beasts that escaped” he explained and Nacht slowly appeared behind him.
Asta´s eyes were beaming right now, he was excited to learn even more about the devil´s powers although he got quite the hang of it and even made a new friend.
Nacht smiled and waved at you, you just looked away as always and stood up to go back inside.
Nothing had changed anyway.
Until Yami stopped you in your tracks.
“If you get going now you´re gonna return by nightfall” he said and you nodded.
Asta sighed in frustration.
“I wanna go on a mission too!” he cried out.
“Not happening” all three of you said at the same time, shutting him up for a bit.
Both you and Nacht didn´t say anything as you made your way to the town in question.
Nacht because he didn´t know how to approach you and you because you thought there was no point in it, he wouldn´t think of you any differently.
And so you started your mission, once again fighting alongside each other and even though the task was dull Nacht´s presence gave you an energy that was unmatched, you just couldn´t help but smile.
When you were done you went deeper into the town to help the people rebuild it.
“Do you wanna go on a date with me?” he said out of the blue, making you turn around in confusion.
“Why would I go on a date with a guy who hates my guts?” you asked, making him sigh sadly.
“I´m sorry if I left that impression on you. I really don´t hate you… it´s quite the opposite actually” he explained.
“Did you just… I swear I never heard you apologize in all those years I´ve known you” you chuckled, not quite processing the second half of his statement.
“I never saw the point in it. All my life I always watched from afar, I always wanted to save people but you know, I´m just operating in the shadows. I´m good at spying and gaining information, saving people. Not so much making friends with them. I never saw it as my role. After all I lived my life for the kingdom and its people and not for myself. Why would I care if anyone liked me? In fact it would be the worst thing that could happen… death was always part of the job description and I was always willing to take that risk if it meant you could live longer. But now… ever since that day, I just want to live with you” he confessed, leaving you at a loss for words, so you did the only logical thing to you in this moment: hug him tightly.
“Of course I´d like to go on a date with you, Nacht. And I will keep protecting you” you smiled.
