Dec 9, 2013
21
(make one confession or tell us a secret)
I may or may not have a super lame and embarrassing ~internet crush~ on this one tumblr user what do you mean I have no secrets
ty for asking dear~ ^.^
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Thailand
seen from France
seen from South Korea
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Greece
seen from Kazakhstan
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Australia
21
(make one confession or tell us a secret)
I may or may not have a super lame and embarrassing ~internet crush~ on this one tumblr user what do you mean I have no secrets
ty for asking dear~ ^.^
I found the other one we did
Underpants - a mystery
by Ham in the Havisham
The Dreary, Fabulous town of Underpants holds a secret.
Gabriel Whitfield has the perfect life working as a Detective in the city and Deep sea diving with his Irridescent boyfriend, Kenzi Lowell.
However, when he finds a Long Scratching post in his cellar, he begins to realise that things are not quite as they seem in the Whitfield family.
A The second coming leaves Gabriel with some startling questions about his past, and he sets off to Enchanting Underpants to find some answers.
At first the people of Underpants are Charming and Flamboyant. He is intruigued by the curiously Cheerful Sous chef, Levi Asagi. However, after he introduces him to hard cocaine, Gabriel slowly finds himself drawn into a web of Murder, cannibalism and perhaps, even Counterfitting.
Can Gabriel resist the charms of Levi Asagi and uncover the secret of the Long Scratching post before it's too late, or will his demise become yet another Underpants legend?
Praise for Underpants
"Who wouldn't give up a life of Deep sea diving with their Irridescent boyfriend to spend a little time with a curiously Cheerful Sous chef?"
- The Daily Tale
"About as mysterious as finding a poo in a public toilet. However, Underpants does offer a valuable lesson about not getting into hard cocaine."
- Enid Kibbler
"The only mystery, is why did I keep reading after page one?"
- Hit the Spoof
"I could do better."
omg the gackt addiction strikes again XD
The Mangled Toes - a crime thriller
by Ham in the Havisham
Mangled Toes have been turning up all over Japan and the inhabitants are scared. Ten murders in ten weeks, all committed with a Crossbow, and still nobody has a clue who the Moody killer is.
Master Gabriel Whitfield is a Fat and Charming Singer with a fondness for Japanese rock music. He doesn't know it yet but he is the only one who can stop the Angry killer.
When his Lover, Kenzi Lowell, is kidnapped, Master Whitfield finds himself thrown into the centre of the investigation. His only clue is a Elasticated fishtank.
He enlists the help of an Eccentric Snake charmer called Levi Asagi.
Can Asagi help Whitfield overcome his GACKT addiction and find the answers before the Rude killer and his deadly Crossbow strike again?
Praise for The Mangled Toes
"Master Whitfield is the best detective ever. A passion for Japanese rock music and GACKT is something we all can relate to."
- The Daily Tale
"About as scary as a minute ant, but The Mangled Toes does deliver an important message about the dangers of a Crossbow."
- Enid Kibbler
"As always, an Eccentric Snake charmer makes the best sidekick."
- Hit the Spoof
"I could do better."
- Zob Gloop
more randomness
Gabriel Whitfield's Diary - a Enchanting romance
by Ham in the Havisham
Gabriel Whitfield is a Striking, Shiny and Charming sniper from bin. His life is going nowhere until he meets Kenzi Lowell, a Really fucking tall, spikey man with a passion for jigsaws.
Gabriel takes an instant disliking to Kenzi and the Moody and miserable ways he learnt during his years in house.
However, when a murderer lion tries to spit on Gabriel, Kenzi springs to the rescue. Gabriel begins to notices that Kenzi is actually rather Chatty at heart.
But, the pressures of Kenzi's job as a chef leave him blind to Gabriel's affections and Gabriel takes up japanese rock music to try an distract himself.
Finally, when Octopus whore, Levi Asagi, threatens to come between them, Kenzi has to act fast. But will they ever find the Enchanting love that they deserve?
Praise for Gabriel Whitfield's Diary
"I fell in love with the Gay Kenzi Lowell. Last night I dreamed that he was in my teapot."
- The Daily Tale
"About as enjoyable as being slapped with a dead fish, but Gabriel Whitfield's Diary does deliver a strong social lesson."
- Enid Kibbler
"I love the bit where a murderer lion tries to spit on Gabriel - nearly fell off my seat."
- Hit the Spoof
"I could do better."
- Zob Gloop
More random plots
Gabriel the Vampire Slayer - a teen vampire story
by Ham in the Havisham
There's a Charming new boy in Flabergasting and he has everybody talking. Stunningly Lanky and devastatingly Striking, all the boys want him. However, Kenzi Lowell has a secret - he's a Moody vampire.
Gabriel Whitfield is a humerous, Attractive boy who enjoys Horse riding. He becomes fascinated by Kenzi who can stop Mountain with his bare hands. He doesn't understand why he's so standoffish.
His bestfriend, a Charismatic Unicorn called Levi, helps Gabriel begin to piece together the puzzle. Together, they discover the ultimate weapon - the shiny, Cumbersome Cheese grater.
When bodies start turning up all over Flabergasting, Gabriel begins to fear the worst. The Unicorn urges her to report Kenzi to the police and he knows he should, so what's stopping him?
He may resist Kenzi's bite, but can he resist his charms?
Will he be caught Deep sea diving with the vampire?
Praise for Gabriel the Vampire Slayer
"Bursting with originality. A humerous boy falling for a Lanky vampire has simply never been done before."
- The Daily Tale
"About as moving as a cow stuck in a bog, but Gabriel the Vampire Slayer does deliver an important message about not having a Unicorn for a friend."
- Enid Kibbler
"A shiny, Cumbersome Cheese grater would be my first choice too. This must be based on a true story, you couldn't make this stuff up!"
- Hit the Spoof
"I could do better."
- Zob Gloop
Me and Iamarmandthevampire messing around with a plot generator this is what we got after entering keywords and names
The Stormy Moors - a lost Bronte novel
by Ham in the Havisham
Kenzi Lowell is a Charming and Flamboyant orphan raised by a Fiery and Immoral Lord. Eventually he gets a job working as a Sniper for the Moody Lord Whitfield of Whitfield Church. The unlikely couple rapidly succumb to a Enchantment passion.
On the day of their wedding, a Lazy Whore escapes from the attic of Whitfield Church and starts a fire. Believing that Lord Whitfield is dead, Kenzi flees from the church and wanders the Stormy moors for days until he is rescued by a Cunning Chef.
However, although Lord Whitfield is blinded by the fire, he still breathes. Without Kenzi he becomes Dastardly and Brooding. He turns to alcohol for comfort. The ghost of the Whore from the attic haunts him.
Meanwhile, thinking Lord Whitfield is dead, Kenzi accepts a marriage proposal from his saviour, the Chef. However, one night he believes he can hear Lord Whitfield calling, "Kenzi, where are you? Kenzi come home!" and he returns to Whitfield Church.
On Kenzi's return, he finds Lord Whitfield drunk and without sight. Mistaking him for the ghost of the Lazy Whore, he attacks him with a Rifles and Kenzi Lowell dies.
As he attends to the body, Lord Whitfield realises what he has done. Driven mad with guilt, he hatches a plan to destroy the next generation, but there is no next generation and he dies of consumption two weeks later.
Praise for The Stormy Moors
"One of the most Enchantment romances ever told. It makes you want to rush out and get a job as a Lord's Sniper."
- The Daily Tale
"I feel more passion when I flush away my daily business than I did reading this book, but The Stormy Moors does warn us against the dangers of keeping a Lazy Whore in the attic."
- Enid Kibbler
"I'd rather marry a Cunning Chef than a Dastardly Lord but each to his own."
- Hit the Spoof
"I could do better."
- Zob Gloop
{{I mean what even this is so hillarious XD}}
iamarmandthevampire replied to your post:I’m lonely.
*snuggles*
Hello, love <3 *snuggles* do you wanna skype by any chance?
iamarmandthevampire replied to your post:I just saw that you tagged the VC gif post as Calmand basically. OMG FEELINGS
Urgh they are so cute man. Me and my friend we ship Calmand and their cuteness. Armand will never deny her cuddles ever.
Is Armand big spoon or little spoon? xD