#iantje

[patreonbros]

I'm uh, not gonna comment

iantje

[patreonbros]

he's beauty, he's grace, he's going at a moderate pace

iantje

[theiantje]

#IanIsOverParty

So today was one of those days on which I thought "what the hell am I even doing with my life". I am an 18 year old guy, who lives in the room of which looks like a 12 year old's room because he really likes How To Train Your Dragon, and also Sonic the Hedgehog and wants to watch Adventure Time. Walls obviously full with posters (which isn't actually a lot because there are no big walls) and the desk full of figurines. The floor is a dark blue with colorful sprinkles and the curtains are about the same. The door still has a sticker of Paddington beer. This is not necessarily what is making me think this, but when I start thinking about this, the 'childish' room is an aspect that ascelates the thought. What actually started this thought this time is the lack of communication with friends. Is it my fault? Perhaps. Is it the fault of my friends? I don't necessarily want to think so. Maybe the fault of other happenings in my life? Definitely yes. I've recently been on vacation for three weeks, and I'll be honest when I say I did have my laptop with me when I was on vacation, but I wasn't on it every single day. In fact, most days I was not. This on its own wouldn't make it this bad, however... There is this (quite popular) Dutch Minecraft community which you need to be invited to. Since there is limited space, they want active members. I wasn't such a member. Especially with the 3 week vacation, which apparently many didn't know about. So eventually I got kicked, silently. One day I tried login in, not whitelisted. Obviously I saw it coming, and I'm not angry, but after 2 weeks of knowing and STILL not any word from my (community 'king') friend about being kicked you've got to question how often I even talk with the guy. Besides the Minecraft thing, the voice server we used (TeamSpeak) recently went down. Obviously there is a backup, which is also a TeamSpeak... only accessible by the members of that Minecraft community. There is also Skype, however last time in a call I got introduced as the irritating guy and the call might have lasted for 30 minutes sooooooo... Besides this, due to the Minecraft community being so popular, I got some attention on Twitter when I was still 'active'. I rocketed from 110 to 210 followers, which I think is pretty decent. However, when I got kicked, people started to lose interest. Most likely also because I got so excited by the attention that I tweeted a ridiculous amount of times per day. I started losing followers, which is a huge blow to my self-esteem. Am I not entertaining enough? Do I have wrong opinions? Am I weird, maybe in a wrong way? Was I just interesting because I got the inside scoop of the Minecraft server? So today I logged out of Twitter with my last tweet for hopefully some time, #IanIsOverParty Ps That tweet is only because of the YouTube stuff happening. I thought it was a fun twist but I must've lost another follower for that. Pps I'm posting this on Tumblr because 140 characters was obviously not enough, and because I think the same amount of people would read this, which is pretty much maybe 1 or 2 on accident. Ppps im currently cutting unions, just so we're clear Pppps My friends are also pretty much only playing on that server or Counterstrike Global Offensive which I both don't play... yay