#iapetus personal

[iapetusneume]

So, fairly recently i started looking at listings for houses, and starting to learn how to read a listing. I'm in no place to buy a home right now, but i figured it would be a good idea to start learning what to look for now, as opposed to later.

Several things have occurred to me as i look.

The first is accessibility. A lot of houses are just... not built for it. If we bought a home that was already built, there would be a lot of remodeling that would need to be done, on top of any remodeling that would have to be done for other reasons.

With existing houses being so inflated in price, i was starting to look at what might be involved in buying land and building on that.

Honestly for what my family wants, a manufactured home would be ideal, on our own land.

But if we couldn't buy our own land, i started to look into mobile home parks. 30-40 years ago, it was considered not a sound investment to make, as the value often depreciates. With the world so crazy and so many rules having been thrown out the window, i wonder of that's still true. And also whom I'd ask. Attempting to research the issue online has only cemented that i should find someone who knows what they're talking about to ask questions.

I wouldn't be opposed to buying a condo, but again the issue is accessibility, as well as the current market.

Part of me wants to see if my brother would be interested in going in on a piece of land for building a house. Or maybe if the land was big enough, two houses. Idk.

Its just so hard to know what to look for anymore with the housing market a mess the way it is. And i see so many of my friends who have houses and... I feel so inadequate.

I want a place of my own that i have the freedom to decorate and make changes as i wish. I want room for a garden. I want to have friends and family over. I'm wondering when it'll be my turn.

[iapetusneume]

So I was casually looking at house listings on Zillow, and I will occasionally look at the houses needing a lot of work. Sometimes I just look to see how much work they would need for the price offered. This one said $30k, so I had to take a peak.

I was not expecting weeping angels, holy shit.

I firmly believe this house is cursed. ~~at least the roof is new~~

[iapetusneume]

So I'm working to get my diabetes under control, and it's not an instant process. I'm taking my medication and [long-acting] insulin every day. (I don't currently take short-acting insulin.) And I finally got a CGM, and changed the sensor for the first time Sunday night.

It was really, really hard to put on the sensor two weeks ago. I was afraid at what I'd see. And while it was hard, I was surprised at how fast I could get it under control. (In a few days.)

I had a moment of weakness on Friday when I had an edible, and ate some things I shouldn't. I've been trying to get my average down since then, and it's been so rough. And I thought I had budgeted my carbs correctly so my blood sugar wouldn't shoot up so quickly when I had a treat, but NOPE.

I am going to ask my doctor at my next appointment if I might be able to have some short-acting insulin to help bring me under control, and for when I'd like to have a treat. Because I'm really struggling.

I can do this. It's just hard.

[iapetusneume]

Re: that last post about fatness

It's really been difficult to talk about my health, without someone commenting on my weight. And besides typical reasons to be upset by that, i feel like they're also not listening to what i say.

With my own private fight to get better about internalized fatphobia, i don't make weight the focus in my health goals.

For example, I'm diabetic. I'm trying to fix my average blood sugar. This involves examination of what i eat, drink, and how much exercise i get. Its seeing how certain foods affect me. Its about establishing habits and patterns.

There's a lot of numbers involved, but none of them are about weight. Its my hypertension and i might need more blood pressure medication. I might get an injury and need to focus on low impact exercises.

So i focus instead about getting my numbers in healthy ranges. Hopefully being able to reduce the amount of medicine i take.

And I'm not gonna lie, I'm not perfect at this. I still have a lot of internalized fatphobia. But I've been working on it. I'm aware of it in a way i didn't used to be. And the first step in solving a problem is admitting the problem is there.

So yeah. I focus on other numbers. I hope that when i succeed or get close to getting the other numbers right that my weight is wherever that make sense.

[iapetusneume]

So I'm going to preface this by saying i do have an appointment with my doctor coming up soon.

That said...

I'm having a sensation in my left hand that i don't know how to describe. The best i can do to describe it is that it feels "tired," like an ache that won't resolve when i rest it.

Like, previously if my hand felt like this, it was a sign to relax it, to have it rest on something.

This is specifically above my wrist, in my palm at the base of my thumb.

And the sensation is... i don't like the sensation, but "pain" doesn't feel like the right word to describe it. "Uncomfortable" feels like I'm trying to be very polite in describing it.

Maybe this is an ache?

[iapetusneume]

So, the Discord fiasco is reminding me that i really need to be getting on that whole backup plan and such. Having more than one way to get a hold of someone. Making digital copies of files that are in formats that are easy to access, and storage not connected to the internet.

And yes, having hard copies of media is best. But i am wondering, what's the best method to back up files? Burning on blue-ray? Dedicated flash drives? Etc?

I need to start backing up my writing and music.

[iapetusneume]

I've been exhausted these past several days.

So, Starting on New Years Eve, I was going to have 5 days off in a row. I was soooooo excited for this, and looking forward to doing a lot of chilling. Maybe a few chores.

Then Navona had a gallbladder attack and went into the ER.

Long story short, she was there until this morning, and had her gallbladder removed. We think this has been the sort of a lot of problems she's been having in the past year or so (not just the one in October that almost killed her), including her cancer scare.

So on my tiny "vacation," I was at my place of employment every single day.

(She's doing well. She's in pain, but everything she's experiencing the doctors say is expected for someone in recovery.)

And it's just. It was a good thing that it happened here, because I have very little PTO and I didn't have to worry about the stress of trying to find someone to cover for me. But I'm still sad I missed my little break. I'm not sure when I'm going to manage the next one.

[iapetusneume]

So, I was looking at job listings at my work, and there's a job I could potentially do. It would be higher paying per hour, but would be the potential of a max of 32 hours a week. (I'm not sure if other shifts can be picked up, etc.)

The thing is, it's a weekend job that could be two 16 hour shifts.

And, like, part of me just boggles at the idea. The other part of me is like "two hard days and five days off."

I'm not sure if I should try for it.