#ides.fave

[demolitionmuses]

you know. sometimes i think about the fact that i realized i was a lesbian because i noticed that instead of loving guys in the like i want to kiss you kind of way, i loved guys in this very like. pure and whole way where a beautiful guy to me was like a beautiful painting. and i find girls beautiful too; when i fall in love with a girl i feel this hope and warmth in my chest and all i can think about is laying in bed beside her and talking from dusk until the sun comes up and holding her hand. kissing her, having a life with her, dancing around in our kitchen together. 

but my love of men came in a different way, in this like... platonic affection, this want to be around them because while they didn’t make me feel like a sun was being born in my chest, they made me feel more like this pleasant sort of moon. where everything feels tranquil and calm when i fall in love with a guy. in that way, i’ve fallen in love with my guy friends so many times. 

i don’t know if that makes much sense, but for me it’s like... what i’m trying to say is that realizing i was a lesbian wasn’t really an acknowledgement of not liking men, or a lack of love towards men. it was an acknowledgement of just how much i loved men, but in a completely different way to how i love women. 

it’s a very healing thing for me. and a bit bittersweet, too, because i just think about how many people out there, people who love women, who also hate men. and it’s like. 

for me, being a lesbian is entirely inseparable from me loving men. sexuality is an aurora borealis of love in many different hues: her kissing my cheek on our first date, him showing me his favorite songs. and of course, all the spectra of love i have with nonbinary people, too. it’s all every shade of light and color imaginable, bursting behind my eyelids all the time. 

i feel like i would miss so, so much out of this life, if i was only looking towards one color. and for me personally, lesbianism is my romantic attraction to women and some nonbinary people, not as much men. but love is so much more than just romantic, and to me, lesbianism is the entire spectrum of light. and an entire spectrum of love. 

i hope that makes sense. being a lesbian and recognizing the wholeness of that love has helped heal me from a lot; trauma and distrust is like black ice to break through, but my queerness has given me fire. and i find prometheus in everyone. these days, including myself. 

[demolitionmuses]

Sorry if this has been asked before, but favorite Ace Attorney game?

hiya! nice pfp omg we are handshaking on the pride flag nitw character icons

i don't think this has been asked actually! for me it's kind of a close run between Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations, Apollo Justice Ace Attorney, and Investigations 2.

I love T&T because it feels like a really satisfying end to the main trilogy, bridge to the turnabout is a work of art and i really do like 98% of the characters you interact with. Godot is my 2nd favorite character in the entire series and it's really cool seeing how Mia defends vs Phoenix, and I love Dahlia a lot. Iris is also another favorite character so, yeah. T&T is just a really well executed game with a lot of satisfying parts imo.

on the other hand... okay Apollo Justice is not anywhere near as satisfying, the Jurist System doesn't really make sense or even exist after the game, the character writing of Beanix is... questionable at best, et cetera. however I ADORE the characters and think that the game has some of my favorite actual trials? Like, I adore Turnabout Corner SO much I know it's one of the most forgettable cases but it's so funny to me because it's just... Apollo having the worst fucking week of his life. Plus Turnabout Serenade has like one of THE FUNNIEST trials and it's kind of Klavier's version of Worst Fucking Week. Klavier is my favorite character (so mad we don't get more of him in later games) and I like Kristoph a lot as a character too. Trucy is so fun and I love Apollo (espec bc this precedes his fifty tragic backstories arc, etc.) All in all just. Yeah! i like it :D it makes me happiest and I think I'm more fixated on this game than any other game in the series.

Finally, investigations 2 which is just. One of the best objective games. Disclaimer that i didn't see like every single case and I mostly watched parts of it with my sister, but I did see the entirety of the final case and HOLY SHIT. I think T&T does a good job wrapping up the entire series, but Investigations 2 is even more incredible with creating a game that concludes so so neatly in the most bizarre way. I love Franziska's characterization in thsi game more than any of the other games in the series, I really like Sebastian's character, Justine Courtney is also really amazing and I love her as like a rival. Simon Keyes is ANOTHER favorite character of mine and I genuinely think that the culmination of the final case is the best reveal of a murderer that the series has ever had. Like Godot was good but the way that I2 ends is like... its SO good. I love it so much. There are parts of the game I don't like as much -- I hate the Kay amnesia plotline in case 3 (?) it was really annoying and also my first exposure to her character so I hated her for a bit -- but overall love love love this game

sorry that was really long. the TLDR is that I think T&T and I2 have the best writing in the franchise, but AJ has more personal happiness factor for me. Also I haven't played Chronicles yet but I know damn well that that would be my favorite were I too so like take this qith a grain of salt

[demolitionmuses]

mare would you be willing to tell us about some positive memories you have of celebrating islamic holidays?

hey anon, put answering this on hold for an hour because it made me tear up a little. just. i really appreciate you so much for asking, you have no idea. <33

one memory that comes to mind wasn't really me celebrating necessarily, more my family. for health reasons i haven't been able to participate in Ramadan (with a total fast) my entire life. but, a couple years ago, my mom sister and brother were fasting, and they were up at 3 AM or so for suhur, and outside the window they saw a fucking. raccoon. just a little guy out there, eating all our birdfood. like the bastard he was.

we celebrate Eid a lot with my grandmother, cousin, and aunt, all paternal: they're the only family near us so most of my cultural experiences are with them. it's been a while since we celebrated with them because their lives have been chaotic the past few years, but it was always really nice :] my aunt is a really good cook and one of my favorite foods is kuba, which is like yellow rice encasing meat and some vegetables and fried(?), it's a finger food. my mom makes it really good but somehow my aunt and grandmother have their own charm to it, and me and my dad fight over eating the entire bowl whenever we go over HAHA. dolma, too, is nice -- you might know it as grape leaves but you can really put the mixture of ingredients into anything. my grandmother used to get really creative with it.

every year, me and my immediate family celebrate new years. we kind of steal some Christmas traditions for our own, with this shitty fake tree with all the leaves falling off and a bunch of random ornaments and then the presents underneath. as we get older it's mostly me and my sister fighting to keep the tradition alive, but it's still always been a nice thing. we recorded the last couple on the same camera that our old baby tapes are on :')

also, other eid thing, but one of the funniest parts is the three day period where none of us know when the fuck eid starts. because it operates off a lunar calendar and my mom's family is split across five different timezones, so we're always really confused about it. pleasant surprises, though :')

this is the most i can really think of, honestly. i think maybe in college i can celebrate more, if i find other muslim people there.

thank you for asking again. i hope you're doing well.

[demolitionmuses]

no words only

CAN YOU ***

[demolitionmuses]

dr 1-v3 cast tier list: 4 (?) years later

obligatory disclaimer: the S tiers is more subjective than the other tiers, but this entire tier list is, obviously, very subjective. my aim though is to rank based on how they were written and their plot contributions. just because a character is in, like, the A tier, doesn't actually mean i like their character i hate some of these bitches on like an emotional level. similarly i would rather watch scenes with yumeno in them than ouma, for example, but y'know. HOWEVER, that's how i personally regard their writing. etc.

also unfortunately you can never kick your affection for your first serious obsession so i can defend/explain maybe all of these in detail. and you are very welcome to ask. sincerely. last note that these are arranged alphabetically, not by "intensity" in each tier. i do not think kuzuryuu is the all time best or that iruma is the all time worst.

tier talk below (/some vague notes about certain characters but again can ask more if you'd like!)

S: as described above, characters who are either better than just "solid, well-crafted", or characters that have personally stuck with me.

A: characters i may not personally care about as much, or may have some writing flaws/missed opportunities, but are genuinely very solidly done.

B: characters who are well written in some ways, but have some substantial flaw/missed opportunity that holds me back; also includes some characters who i just feel neutral towards (like hoshi).

C: characters who either could have done more, or were mixed feelings in a way that i felt like warranted another tier. also includes some that i just cannot be bothered to think about for that long; like honestly yumeno & mioda are pleasant and could have gone higher but i can't really conceive of any solid rationale for liking their writing, so.

D: characters who are not irreparable, but have such substantial writing flaws that it is difficult to overlook in favor of their good traits.

F: characters who i genuinely think, as they exist, do not contribute that much good to the plot. tiers C, D & F is where i see the most fanon work coming into play to better/nuance them, but as they are in canon... yeah.

[demolitionmuses]

MARE. THE WAR IS OVER. THANKS TO A RANDOM FOLLOWER ON TUMBLR DOT COM.

I now have spent so long looking for this stupid fucking picture i am 5 hours from having to wake up for work tomorrow. #HELP. BUT IT WAS WORTH EVEURY GODDAMN MINUTE.

YAYYYYYY WAR IS FUCKING OVER. you did it you win these... i hope you sleep with an eased mind now

[demolitionmuses]

mare u are made of stars in my eyes ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ <- thats u

ilysm <333

[demolitionmuses]

Hiii friend I hope you're doing well :]

JAYMES JAYMES JAYMES!!!!!! HIIIIIIIIIII HIIII MY FRIEND HOW ARE YOU DOING? i hope you're doing well!!!!! <3333 :]