#ifyoudateme

[raigekivolpe]

Just being honest :) #ifyoudateme #illeatyourfood #illeatyoursnacks #illeateverything

[sighhluna]

If you date me, you'll have to deal with me constantly making you cupcakes and cookies. Its just part of being with me. Like "I love you, babe. Here is twelve dozen cupcakes I made to show you how much I appreciate you."

[toteaugenkoennennurdentodsehen]

When we date:

-You dont have to Wear High heels.

-You dont have to Wear make up, because you look fantastic the way you are.

-You don't have to war to small fucking clothes because fuck society and the media, you are a woman and you are perfect the way you are.

-You don't have to stand in the kitchen for hours because my Queen is getting threatend like a Queen.

-You don't have to clean because I'll do most of the stuff.

-You don't have to worry about being cheated on, because you will be the only woman I'll have eyes for.

-Our kids will be raised to have fucking respect for they're mother because she is the most beautiful and smartest woman in the world.

-We will fuck a loooot.

-You can do what you like because I'm not one of jealous type of guy.

-If you want to watch a romantic movie I'll give a fuck if the Blackhawks have they're biggest game, my Queen wants it, she gets it.

[imnoaingeal]

😂😂😂 I mean...I'm just trying to give ya a heads up 😉😈 #sorrynotsorry #ifyoudateme #fairwarning 😂😂😂

[leisleythegreat]

When you date me...

Bae: babe come over! 

Me: I just put some pizza in the oven 

Bae: My parents aren’t home ;) 

Me: I literally just put it in the oven....

[r3dn3ck-commi3]

#IfYouDateMe

[charcharpikapoop]

If You Date Me...

Make sure there is always chocolate milk in the fridge :)

[chelseafaith]

If you date me; A Prewarning for those interested.

Hello there folks, Here are some of the things you have to deal with when it comes to dating me.  1) I am thee biggest bitch in the world if you wake me up. Either by being loud or talking on the phone while laying in bed right next to me. 2) My constant bitching of the above if it does indeed happen more then once. 3)How much of a little kid I am at heart. I will sit down and watch kids movies simply because I can and because they make me feel young again. 4)How I'm not a super affectionate person while out in public, I will hold your hand and kiss you occasionally but I am not one for making out in public.  5) That when I'm drunk the above mentioned no longer applies and that I will kiss you more then you could probably stand. 6) If male; my attraction to females and enjoying a good looking women from a distance. If female; my attraction to men and enjoying them from a distance. 7) My "Granny" like attitude when it comes to going out. I love having nights out but most of the time I like to stay in and just curl up and watch netflix. 8) My love for traveling and seeing friends who also do the same; I have the worst case of wonderlust and can not be contained to one place for long. 9) My love for Volkswagens; You may find it a little odd, But I will turn my head quicker to watch one go by then someone I might find attractive. It's not just a love, it's a way of life. 10) With the above mentioned the fact that I will probably drag you out to car meets with me and to events sometimes and will do my best to make you enjoy them.  11) I will defend my friends to the death; The ones that matter anyways. There's VERY few people I consider real friends now a days and if they need me and we already make plans I will break our plans to make sure that they are okay.  I can't think of anything else right now. So this is it for the time being.