Personal post - my apologies.
Trying to process a break-up after a serious relationship has brought up my entire scale of emotions. I think the hardest part right now is grieving the loss of not only a girlfriend, but also a best friend. It’s like one person left my life and two huge roles that I relied on have been left empty. There are so many shows I won’t be able to watch, songs I won’t be able to listen to, even foods I won’t eat and places I won’t go, for quite awhile. She really touched every corner of my life and I miss her. It's hard to imagine myself loving anyone else right now, or seeing her with anyone else, but I know I'll get there in time. We both deserve to be truly happy. So I'm trying to stay positive. It’s only Day 2 since we broke up, and I’m proud of myself for how I’ve been so far. I know this will be best for both of us, that we were meant to meet, we gave what we gave, and we are supposed to go our separate ways. I’m trying to focus my mind, body, and spirit elsewhere, like school, exercise, and meditation. I’m trying to view this as an opportunity for growth, a chance for me to take everything I’ve learned about life and love over the last two years and let that turn me into a better person in the future. A better partner. And I want to be better individually. I want to use this time to learn to love myself before anyone else. I have a lot of positive outlooks for this healing process and my future, and I’m trying to embrace the beauty in the pain of it all. I just need to be patient with my heart in the meantime. I’ve had so many thoughts about the relationship, and I’ve been trying to recognize them to help find closure. But I just hope she knows I wouldn’t change anything about what we had together. I hope she knows I'm not mad. Every moment was perfect, and she has helped me in ways I will never be able to describe or thank her for. I would love to be a part of her life again someday, so I hope we can meet up down the road and be friends. I sincerely hope she finds happiness, in herself and in whoever she ends up with. They’ll be lucky and I hope they know that every second of every day. Thanks for the best two years, P.