Alistair gave Suledin a pat on the head and let out a quiet sigh. “but..” “yes?” Maris said, a little too loud, a little too angry because she knew what he wanted to ask her. “but he saved you. He was a good man, a great grey warden, and he saved you. How..” Maris knew what Duncan meant to Alistair, and she had tried to be quiet about her feelings towards the man, but he kept asking, kept insisting. Maybe he was a great man, maybe he had done great things for many people, but she could not appreciate them. “I’ve told you this before, Alistair. I’m not grateful, I don’t feel like I owe him anything. I am sorry that he’s dead, but..” “I don’t understand you. you’re alive! he saved your life. he wa-” Maris stood up, angry now “then understand this. I did not ask to be saved. I did not wish to be saved. When he found me outside that cave I was already dead. this is NOTHING. this-” she paused, tears in her eyes now - “This is not living.” She saw the change on Alistair’s face then, anger turning to pity. “and if- if I had to live why drag me away from my clan? forcing me to say goodbye to my family, all that I have ever known. Did he think my life would be a sufficient reward? It is not. I did not ask to be saved. I did not wish to be saved. I had already died. my vhenan, my- heart.. he was gone. I was gone. I did not ask for this.”
mockup yo. work on this narrator voice: she did not work on it
