Word count: ~3,550(I'm using a different app, so I don't know the count for sure)
Warnings: None
Pride month fic. 🏳️🌈
First time writing She-ra fanfiction.
Catra twitched in her sleep, growling under her breath. Adora was awake.
She always slept lightly. Years of life in the Horde had trained her to wake at the slightest disturbance. Back then it had been guards making their rounds through the barracks, armor rattling softly as they walked the halls. Sometimes it was the distant cries of creatures outside the Fright Zone walls. Sometimes it was her own nightmares dragging her awake with her heart pounding.
These days, it was usually Catra.
Not intentionally, of course.
Catra slept curled against her side, one arm draped possessively across Adora's waist. The position had become so familiar that Adora could barely remember what it was like sleeping alone. Warm fur brushed against her skin with every breath Catra took.
And every nightmare.
A low growl rumbled from Catra's chest. Her ears flattened against her head even in sleep. Adora sighed quietly. At first she'd tried waking her every time.
The nightmares had been worse after the war.
Especially after Prime.
But Catra had eventually grabbed her wrist one morning and told her to stop.
"Just let me sleep, okay? Even if it's bad."
Adora hadn't liked it, but she'd listened. Catra needed rest more than either of them wanted to admit. Sometimes the nightmares were the only sleep she got.
So now Adora simply watched.
Moonlight spilled through the bedroom window, painting pale silver across the blankets. It caught in Catra's hair, making the dark strands shine.
Adora smiled faintly.
Catra had started growing it out after Prime had shaved it. At first it had been uneven and awkward, sticking out in every direction no matter what she did. Catra had complained constantly about it, threatening to cut it all off again every few days. Now it framed her face in soft layers, brushing her jaw and curling slightly at the ends. Not long, exactly. More like a bob.
Adora thought it was cute. Not that she'd said that out loud.
The last time she'd complimented Catra's hair she'd gotten a pillow thrown directly at her face.
Carefully, Adora lifted a hand and scratched behind one fuzzy ear. Catra immediately leaned into the touch.
Even asleep.
A tiny smile tugged at Adora's mouth.
"You're ridiculous," she whispered. The ear flicked beneath her fingers. Slowly, Catra's growling faded. Her breathing deepened. The tension in her shoulders eased.
Satisfied, Adora let her eyes drift shut. Maybe she could get a few more hours.
She was just beginning to slip back toward sleep when Catra suddenly jerked. Sharp claws buried themselves into Adora's arm.
"Hss—"
Adora bit back a yelp. Pain shot through her skin. "Ow, Catra."
Still asleep.
Adora carefully reached down and pried the claws loose one by one before they could do any more damage. She rubbed the sore spot with a wince. Catra made a distressed noise in the back of her throat.
Another twitch ran through her body.
Adora frowned.
Without thinking, she wrapped both arms around Catra and pulled her closer. Catra practically melted into the embrace despite being asleep. Adora buried her face against Catra's neck, soft fur brushing against her nose. For a moment everything seemed calm again. Then Catra flinched. A sharp, frightened movement. A whimper escaped her lips.
Not a growl.
Not anger.
Fear.
Adora's stomach sank. She knew that sound.
There were different kinds of nightmares. The angry ones left Catra snarling and lashing out. The guilty ones had her mumbling half-formed apologies in her sleep.
But these ones—
Adora didn't like when Catra had these nightmares.
The ones where Catra woke shaking.
The ones where she clawed at the back of her neck as if she could still feel the chip there. Clawed at her own skin as if it was a parasite she had to remove. The ones where she looked around wildly for several seconds before remembering where she was.
Adora tightened her grip. "Catra." Another whimper. "Catra, hey." She gently shook her shoulder. Nothing. Catra's breathing was getting faster. Adora swallowed. "Catra."
This time she shook her a little harder. Catra let out a slightly strangled, confused noise as she surfaced from sleep.
"Mrpmh…"
Her ears flicked irritably.
For a moment she just blinked into the darkness, clearly trying to figure out where she was. Then her gaze landed on Adora.
"S'mthing wrong?" she asked softly, voice rough with sleep.
Adora couldn't help smiling a little at how disoriented she looked.
"Yeah," she said, reaching up to smooth a hand through Catra's hair. "You were clawing my arm."
Catra immediately huffed. "Oh." Her eyes flicked down toward Adora's arm. "…Sorry." The apology came automatically, quiet enough that Adora almost missed it. Then Catra's ears flattened. "Told you not to wake me even if I'm having a nightmare."
Adora sighed. "I know."
Catra gave her a pointed look. "So why'd you?"
For a few seconds neither spoke.
The moonlight filtering through the curtains painted silver stripes across the blankets. Most of Catra's face remained hidden in shadow, but her eyes reflected the light.
Adora knew that look.
The defensive one.
The one that appeared whenever Catra was trying very hard not to talk about something. "I know what kind you were having," Adora said quietly.
Catra froze. Just for a second. But Adora noticed.
The slight twitch of her ears.
The way her shoulders tightened.
The way her gaze slid away.
"Oh." The single word came out smaller this time. Adora felt more than saw her wince. Silence settled between them. Outside, a breeze rustled the trees near the window. Somewhere in the distance a night bird called. Catra remained stubbornly quiet. Adora gave her a few minutes.
Then finally she asked softly, "Shadow Weaver or Prime this time?"
Catra's eyes closed. A long sigh escaped her. For several moments Adora thought she might refuse to answer. Then Catra mumbled, "Kinda both…" The admission sounded reluctant. Like she hated giving voice to it. Adora's hand continued stroking slowly through her hair.
"What happened?" Catra grimaced.
"I don't really remember."Her claws flexed against the blanket. "The dreams are getting less vivid." She frowned. "Less pictures. Less actual memories." She swallowed. "More just…" Her ears flattened. "Feelings."
Adora listened quietly. Catra stared at a spot somewhere beyond her shoulder. "Like I know somebody's there." Her voice dropped lower. "Hands grabbing me." A shudder ran through her body. "Someone doing what they want me." Her breathing hitched. "Being watched all the time." The growl that followed sounded more miserable than angry. "And then there's sometimes the stupid chip."
Adora felt her stomach twist. "The feeling of it?"
Catra nodded. "Yeah."
Her hand moved unconsciously toward the back of her neck. "The pressure." Another pause. "The feeling that you're still in there somewhere but you can't make yourself move." Her claws dug into the blanket. "I hate it."
Adora's chest hurt. Not because she didn't understand. Because she understood all too well. Without saying anything, she let her hand trail down from Catra's hair. Across her cheek. Her thumb brushed gently beneath one eye. Then Adora leaned forward and pressed her lips softly against Catra's.
The kiss was slow.
Gentle.
Nothing demanding.
Just there.
A reminder.
You're here.
You're safe.
You're with me.
Catra immediately melted against her. A quiet purr vibrated in her chest. When they finally pulled apart, Catra rested her forehead against Adora's shoulder.
"I hate that I'm still thinking about this." Her voice was muffled. "Prime's been dead for a year and a half." A bitter laugh escaped her. "Shadow Weaver too." Adora shifted, one hand moving from Catra's cheek to the back of her neck.
Then lower.
Tracing along her spine.
Guiding her closer until Catra was half sprawled across her chest. The position seemed to calm her immediately. Her ears relaxed. Her tail settled.
"I get it," Adora said quietly.
Catra snorted. "Do you?"
"Yeah." Adora stared up at the ceiling. "I still think about Shadow Weaver a lot." The words felt strange to admit. But true. She still heard her voice sometimes. Still caught herself wondering whether she'd approve of something. Still remembered standing at attention waiting for praise that never quite came.
She was opening her mouth to explain when Catra interrupted. "Yeah." The word came out sharper than intended. "But she didn't abuse you."
Adora frowned. "I got hit sometimes."
Catra immediately scoffed. "Adora."
"What?"
"You know what I mean."
Adora looked away. Because she did. Catra buried her face against her shoulder. "I know she hurt you too." Her voice softened. "But she liked you." The words sounded almost guilty. As if Catra hated saying them. "She thought you were worth something."
Adora flinched. "Catra—"
"No." Catra's ears flattened again. "She didn't—" Her voice broke. The sentence cut off. A strangled sound escaped her throat. Adora felt her whole body tense. A small sob followed. Quickly smothered. Like Catra was embarrassed it had escaped at all. Immediately Adora wrapped both arms around her.
Pulling her close. Pressing their foreheads together. "I know." The words came out barely above a whisper. Catra squeezed her eyes shut. "I know." For a moment neither moved. "I still wish you'd told me."
Catra laughed weakly. "About what?"
"About her doing that." Adora's throat tightened. "The things she did." Catra looked away.
"We were kids."
"I know."
"We were, like, twelve when she started." Her tail flicked irritably. "You would've confronted her." Adora opened her mouth. Catra pointed at her. "You would've."
"…Maybe."
"You would've marched right into her office and yelled at her."
"Probably."
"And then gotten yourself punished."
Adora smiled faintly. "Probably."
Catra rolled her eyes. "You're stupid." The insult lacked any real heat. "You're stupid and caring and heroic and annoying." A tiny smile tugged at Adora's lips.
Adora shrugged. "I would've taken it." Catra froze. Adora buried her face against the soft fur of her neck. "If it meant you got hurt less."
For a second Catra didn't respond. Then Adora felt a low purr begin. Soft.
Warm. Steady. A hand rose and brushed gently against Adora's cheek.
"See?" Catra murmured sleepily. "Stupid."
Adora laughed quietly. "Yeah."
The purring grew stronger. Catra's body slowly relaxed. The tension she'd carried when she woke faded little by little. Her breathing slowed. Her eyes drifted closed. Adora kissed the side of her neck. The nearest ear flicked.
"How's meditation with Perfuma going?" Adora asked softly. One eye opened. Catra groaned dramatically.
"Really?"
"What?"
"You wait until I'm falling asleep."
Adora grinned. "That's when you're honest."
Catra muttered something unintelligible. Then finally sighed. "…Good."
"Good?"
"Yeah."
Adora waited. Catra yawned. A huge, jaw-cracking yawn. "Never really had time to…"Another yawn interrupted her. "…sit and think." Her voice was already fading. "Turns out…" A sleepy purr rumbled through her chest. "…that's probably important."
Adora smiled. "You think?"
"No."
A pause. Then, half asleep: "Still stupid."Within seconds her breathing deepened. The purring settled into a slow, steady rumble. Catra had fallen asleep completely. This time without nightmares. Adora listened to the sound for a while. Then pressed one last kiss against her forehead, tightened her arms around her, and finally allowed herself to drift back to sleep too.
#f1
#photography
#the amazing digital circus
#heated rivalry
