#imnotreadyforcollege

[shippingeverythingfangirl12]

Why did I see 2 different back to school commercials recently?

I'm not really ready to go to college...

(Plus I don't go to college until September 😭)

[ishauntedbythemoon]

Please tell me I’m not the only one who gets stressed and always reaches for a particular object? So I have this blanket I found at the thrift store a while back. It was really soft and fluffy. I bought it on impulse. Took it home and washed it and now it’s become the thing I grab when I’m stressed. I am a 20 year old adult and when I get stressed I reach for my cloud which is a white puffy blanket that looks like a cloud. Deal with it. Source: http://kimxiekk13.deviantart.com/art/Stress-555592418?ga_submit_new=10%253A1440300596

[ishauntedbythemoon]

The Rant of someone with anxiety and a short fuse for BS

I probably sound like a dick for saying this but I need to say it. college is like work for some people, you’re only there as long as you need to be and when you’re not needed you just want to go home. Unless you’re me, in which case you always want to go home. 

Am I the only one who in middle school people would be like “oh, so school starts in 8 days” And i’m like “oh ok.” but then come college and people are like “So school starts in 8 days” and my immediate thought is “shut the fuck up. I don’t want to hear it” with so much venom in my voice that I NEVER knew I could have in a two small sentences before. Like.... I just wish I didn’t have to go and live there. I’d rather just commute and not pay for stupid rent, or school shit, or fear walking down the street, or having to feed the roommate who is like “Um, I dunno how to cook” and it’s like “that’s a damn shame” as I literately squirrel all available food in my arm’s reach into my over sized sweater and leave because I’m NOT taking care of more people for another goddamn school year. No.  I’ll lose my mind if hear my teachers getting upset with me because I’d rather stay INSIDE and AWAY from the townsfolk to do homework. When a good chunk of the population is crazy and horribly substance abusing what makes you think I want to go anywhere near them? I enjoy my time at home. I enjoy walks in the woods, at home. I enjoy hearing the howls of coyotes and NOT the laugh of a drunken idiot walking past my windows... at home. I do not feel safe in the city and there is little to nothing you can do that will make me comfortable and feel safe in the city... That’s just it. I’ve held it in for about a year, but no more. I DO NOT FEEL SAFE IN CITIES. PERIOD. I don’t. So no, I don’t want to party in the city. I’m here to learn a skill to get a job so I don’t become homeless and die so why the fuck would I go drink and party? What would they accomplish? Nothing. Nothing but waste my money and time. Sometimes I just want to stay home forever, work and do online classes. I realize doing this would result in me missing out on meeting people who would be my future best friends even dare I say... S.O. but... I also can’t take the stress of doing this whole roommate thing... One other person, fine. That’s fine. But when you start adding other people to the mix then we start to have a problem.  and just writing this has me tearing up in frustration and from being scared of having to face some of those crazy people all over again. And listening to my teachers be upset with me and not understand me when I try to explain myself, why I do the things I do or why I CAN’T do the things other people can. I may be an adult, but I might as well NOT be because I can NEVER do the things I want to because there’s always something in my way. Either in my head or right in front of me and I hate it.