Jun 22, 2017
me: -is in a deep state of despair-
also me: posting my butt on the internet will fix everything
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me: -is in a deep state of despair-
also me: posting my butt on the internet will fix everything
anyone else have rly annoying bouts of sadness where you just cry silently for like 2 hours despite trying to think of anything except what’s making you sad?
hey so i’m sorry because this is gonna be a real downer but like. i gotta complain real quick
i’m the least favorite friend in literally all of my friend groups and it’s very emotionally draining to be aware of that and still try to give 100% when it comes to being there for people
i’m the root of most of my boyfriend’s problems even though he doesn’t want to admit it and living with that knowledge is extremely difficult
there is so much wrong with my body and i’ll probably never know what it’s like to live without constant pain or discomfort, and even if there were a solution to my physical problems, my mental health problems are still there and therapy isn’t doing much but i’m too weak to tell my therapist that she and i aren’t working well together and i need to find someone else
i’m very unattractive in both face and body and yet??? i am reduced to my looks by like 70% of the people who talk to me and it makes me feel unworthy of platonic affection. trying to make friends when people just want to fuck you is uh, pretty heartbreaking. and also trying to figure out why that happens when you think you’re fucking repulsive and disgusting is a mindfuck
i’ve been told that i’m an idiot and i have no personality and i frequently hear that i’m intimidating or cold and it genuinely hurts to know that years of effort to be more personable hasn’t done anything and no one will ever really like me at all and nothing i do will change their minds
i would rather live than die but i’d rather die than keep feeling like this
yknow not to be Very Dramatic but i reblogged this post: http://whatpunkin.tumblr.com/post/171371016000/ between my first and second date with a boy about a month ago, not thinking anything of it, and now he is my boyfriend??? he holds me and plays with my hair while singing to me??? and he looks at me and he's like "WOW OKAY YOU'RE PERFECT" and he's going to cosplay with me??? and most importantly he understands that i have Been Through Some Shit and he is nothing but loving and supportive??? the universe DID hit me with a keeper goddamn
real talk? real shit? the honest to god truth? everyone would be happier and better off if i were gone for good.
hey does anyone else cry because they know they're fundamentally unlovable and unworthy of being cared about, and yet what they want more than anything in the world is to be someone's first choice just once no? haha me either, cool cool cool cool cool
hey quick question, y’all ever like someone so much that you don’t even want to be with them because you want so much better for them? because that’s where i’m at right now and it fucking SUCKS my dudes
not to be Ultra Mega Gay but my brain’s only ever quiet when i’m napping next to someone and it sure would be nice to have someone right about now