#incorrect simps

[incorrect-simps]

karl: wait, how many kids DO you have?

phil: biologically, emotionally, or legally?

[incorrect-simps]

sapnap: so whats your type?

george: kind, dumb, blonde, good sense of humour

dream: hey that kinda sounds like me, too bad im not a girl

george: ...did i mention dumb?

dream: yeah

george: just making sure

[incorrect-simps]

tubbo: hi welcome to applebees, would you like apples or bees?

ranboo: b-bees?

tubbo: HE HAS SELECTED THE B E E S

ranboo: w-wait-

tommy: *walks in shaking a jar full of bees*

ranboo: WAIT-

[incorrect-simps]

tommy: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with ranboo recently.

tubbo: No, tommy, it's not what it looks like, I swear.

tommy: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

tubbo: No! You’re the only one for me.

tommy: Is that so?

tubbo: I promise! ranboo and I are just dating, okay? They’re my partner.

tommy: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

tubbo: You are still my one and only best friend! They’re just the love of my life, nothing more!

tommy: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

tubbo: Of course bro!

tommy: Bro...

ranboo: What the-

[incorrect-simps]

*ranboo is casually searching around the room*

tommy: Hey ranboo, what’re you looking for?

ranboo: My will to live.

*tubbo walks into the room*

ranboo: Oh, there it is.

[incorrect-simps]

Tommy: Accept your flaws, you’ll feel better. It worked for me.

Techno: You’ve accepted your flaws?

Tommy: No, I accepted yours.

[incorrect-simps]

Ranboo: Truth or dare

Tommy: Truth

Ranboo: How many hours have you slept this week?

Tommy: Dare

Ranboo: Go to sleep

Tommy: I don’t like this game

[incorrect-simps]

wilbur: why would you give a knife to a child?!

techno: tommy felt unsafe.

wilbur: now i feel unsafe!

techno: im sorry

techno: ...would you like a knife?