#incorrectdiscworldquotes

[incorrectdiscworldquotes]

Source: Homestuck

Ysabel: It’s a truly appalling idea, but just for the sake of curiosity- what do you think it would be like if we had children?

Mort(Startled): What would it be like? Inconvenient, mostly.

Ysabel(Defensively): Oh never mind, I was just asking. I wasn’t seriously suggesting- I wouldn’t- never mind!

Mort(After a moment of uncomfortable silence): For what it’s worth, I’m picturing it now.

Ysabel(Trying to decide if she’s being mocked): Oh?

Mort(Staring into thin air): A girl, I think. A perfect little freak of nature, raised by people who’ve clearly got no business bringing up anybody.

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Polly: Would you like to stay for dinner?

Polly's father: Would you like to stay forever?

Maladicta: Dinner...would be fine.

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Vimes: and who are you?

Detritus: I'm on the brute squad.

Vimes: You ARE the brute squad.

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I am as cool as I must be.

Granny Weatherwax, probably

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Sam Vimes: I am the law guardian, guardian of the law!

Carrot: The Summoning Dark quivers before him!

Sam Vimes, facing a cave full of dwarves: WHERE'S MY COW?

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OF ALL THE SOULS I HAVE MET ON MY TRAVELS, HIS WAS THE MOST...HUMAN.

Death. GNU Terry Pratchett.

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Moist: And I couldn't have done it without my sidekick, Dick Simnel!

Simnel: No offense, Moist, but you're the sidekick.

Moist: Am I? Do..do people really think that...?

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We only have Man Car Door Hook Hand on Sundays!

Feeney Upshot, probably