my dream is to one day own a tourist trap called "the home of phobia" witht rh gimmick "home to every fear under the sun, moon, and seven seas" and id live there. and my favorite part would be at the end of the tour, when ppl are all confident that they made it out entirely unafraid, and unscathed (they have to sign a waiver at the front saying they wont sue me of they get hurt), before one brave soul realized that "wait, you missed two." they all take a steep inhale realizing that yes, i xid in fact miss two, crucial fears. a grin creeps up on my face, "oh? i see you havent noticed my shirt" i unbutton my vest with maniacal flair, when suddenly, an oven goes off from inside the house. a large, buff man emerges from behind curtains the audience has failed to notice, hes holding a tray of cookies. he approaches me through the crowd and plants a kiss on my forhead (he has to lean down) "honey, the cookies are ready"
"ah, thank you, love, would you mind helping me with my vest, the buttons are being tricky again" he drops the cookie tray and rips my vest off (its fine, i have a bunch bcause this happens all the time) and we start making out. the tattered remains of my vest fall to reveal my shirt, decorated w/ the trans pride flag. twenty people faint. my dream is a success
