#internal fears

[oneplante]

what if i’ve made nightwings ass too big . what if i drew his ass too phat.

[laavenderhoney]

I honestly have so many internal fears built up inside of me that I've just shoved into the coat closet of my mind and they're really starting to push out at the door and I don't have any clue on what to do or how to react because I've never actually dealt with any of them, I've just ignored them and let them fester within my head. I just don't know and it leaves me really dizzy and confused. I'm sorry to ask, but if any of you have advice on how to cope or what to do to lessen these fears I just would really appreciate it? My head feels fuzzy and its hard to talk and all I really want is one of those hugs that linger a while and I just need to be held and told I'm not what I think I am. I sound so pathetic but I just am so tired of being on my own and fighting this shit on my own.

[garagemartyr]

Reasons Why I Don't Want To Have Sex

- I'm exhausted and I feel bad when you have to do all the work. - Your room is freezing and I have no desire to take off my clothes - I just ate a burger and I feel gross - I didn't shower today and I feel gross - I'm worried I slept with you too soon and now you think I'm easy - You're just the right level of drunk that you remind me of an ex - I really like you and I'm worried you won't like me as much when you realize I'm not very good in bed - I have a shitty history with men I sleep with and I'm scared - I still don't know what sex means to me - I still don't know what sex means to you Assumed Reasons I Don't Want To Have Sex - I hate sex - I withhold sex as a weapon - I'm an uptight, frigid bitch Hope that clears everything up.

[haeresis-dea]

Magi 224...

*Sniff sniff* Do you smell that...?

That is the aroma of my OTP succesfully cooking in the Canon oven :3 

But... ugh... what is this other smell...? Possible tragedy also awaiting in the oven because everything is going so well??!! D:  Please, no...

[roamngreenwoods]

Is the idea of a "dystopia" too cliched now?

When I was little (elementary, middle school) I LOVED dystopias because they were something that no one appreciated enough. They were so complex and fantastic. From the first time I read 1984 (8th grade) I knew when I wrote a book, I wanted it to be a dystopia. 

Between then and now, many, many things have happened. First, the unexpected: It became cool to write dystopia? Hunger Games was now a dystopian trendsetter? YA books were now feeding off of the new-ness of the dysfunctional society? I was shocked and amazed, and very resentful that all of the tropes and theories that I had saved to include in my book were now considered common shortcuts.

What does this mean for my book, which I will write for NaNo? Do people even still want to see another dystopian book? Will the fad grow old as soon as my book is ready? My biggest fear is that my book will be dismissed as nothing but part of the growing fad, and that it will come to late to be even considered by the shrinking reading market.

[thedarknesswillgetussoonenough]

Dreams of a Drunken Slumber

My mind is wrapped in gifts of despair Thinking too much, too hard about nothing and the heaviness stings and the gravity sinks in I fall asleep wondering... Like a pencil I'm at point break, can't write with this can't make this shit up rewind, start over, try to erase it But this ain't sitcom, face it you can't just pause, to be continued... fans hate the wait, like the first to arrive for a blind-date palms sweaty, tongues tied, nerves ending food's alright, both dressed to impress but the questionnaire nightmare seems neverending until the post-dessert dessert cums, perfect timing and then you think you've found the one justifying the love, no glove, swear to your friends this one's different that he's not just another guy who wants to hit and quit until his wife checks in and your stomach's sick look at you now, check this. stomach swells, box for "morning sickness," check yes doctor smiles and says congratulations. like the pastel balloons that showed up for a 'happy' occasion daddy to be is playing hide and seek so good, 18 years unfounded hope to hell that he's been drowned, long gone dead or bounded russian roulette victim lost to the sound of waves at sea thoughts thicken to distract yourself from the error of the truth for a woman unguarded, never let a man get the best of you like a tray of cookies in a classroom before naptime A starving artist in front of a plate of rap rhymes and lyric lines swallowing down the words like this is the last track, no chorus one last chance and for the record, he never knew you faked it but the reality of a baby can't erase it one more verse before the fade and I call out; what the fuck am I supposed to do now? but my alarm clock starts screaming my name and as my heart pounds I press the snooze again the curtains didn't close, it was all a dream But if dreams can come true, what the fuck does that mean? My mind is drunk watching sheeps jump Thinking too much, too hard about everything exhaustion wins and the gravity lifts me again I fall asleep wondering...

[femmeflower]

i had a really bad dream that i took spouse out to the vet with me and he got really sick from drinking something like drain-o on the way there. he died from feeling so ill and the rest of the dream was about me greiving and convincing myself spouse wasnt gone. my dream was interrupted by spouse in real life meowing in my face and nudging me with his paws trying to bug me in my sleep. i grabbed him tight and hugged him so relieved hes still here.

[edwardo-elric]

this is an episode about a  clown

fu uck