2 days ago I watched the Exorcism of Emily Rose, which admittedly, even on my scare scale wasn't incredibly scary. The real issue for me is that it is disturbing on a different level.
When it comes to scary movies, I'm fine for some things. Movies like signs, or psychological thrillers like Cabin in the Woods work for me. I don't have issues sleeping, I enjoy watching them (as long as I can cling apprehensively to the arm of whomever is inflicting it on me) and after walking away, be just fine.
Movies like Sinister, Paranormal Activities 3, and the Exorcism of Emily Rose scare the hell out of me and leave me with a bad taste in my mouth and random moments of hair raising terror related to a brief flash of image in my mind, sometime months after the event. This is a 'me' thing, and I realize it's not common.
In my own personal belief system (I am a practicing Christian of a more traditional nature, albeit not a very 'good' one) I do believe demons, angels, heaven, and hell are all very real and demons are something you shouldn't fuck with. Because of this belief, I do make certain choices. I will never touch or be in a room where a Ouija Board is being used, and I will not be a part of conversing with any sort of spirit. I personally believe once you die, you go to one place or the other, and any spirit activity is either angels comforting you or demons screwing with you, and while angels would be okay, I'm not going to risk messing with any demon. I'm not going to judge anyone else for doing so, it's just not a choice i'm going to make.
My thought process started with a memory. I was once watching a Hannibal movie with a friend, and she mentioned how she hated movies like this (ironically she was perfectly ok with Paranormal Activities 3) because they are real and could happen. After processing information in my own mind, I realized this is why I hate the paranormal/demonic ones. I believe these things are real and people can be possessed (although in this day and age, it's so much easier to manipulate people through other means that possessions are a less common tool for said demons) and while I can fight (or tell myself I can fight) against a living breathing person (hence lesser fear of serial killer movies) I am helpless against the demonic kind.
On the other hand, I watch Supernatural religiously, and in fact love the demon character Crowley. I'm not sure what's going on in my head there where I can be okay with the one and get nightmares from the movies. It might just be that in the show, there are ways to fight back, and that I know for a fact, by the end of the episode, the hero's will have overcome. They might die in the process, but they are resilient and odds are good, if they aren't back by the end of the episode, they'll be back for the next one. Also, they always seem to have some kind of purpose, or motive, and if you don't stand in the way, you'll be just fine. That is all the explanation I have for that. I still need to think about it some more.
In the end, here is the important thing. Supernatural horror movies scare the crap out of me because of my own personal beliefs about the reality of the supernatural. This is not going to change. What I ask is that you accept that, accept me, and move on, without me feeling the need to comment about how 'ridiculous I am' when really, I don't feel I am being so.
I get to see the lovely Laura and charismatic Kelly tonight! They will comfort me through my feels and then laugh as I get 5 hrs of sleep before work. It will be a good time!
False tired alarm. Now I'm just cold. And don't want to sleep. But I need sleep. Laura come cuddle me til I sleeeeeeeeeeeep. Nooooooow. You're sleeping aren't you. Anyone else want to be my cuddle buddy? I'm not picky unless you wanna murder me. Then you at least have to do a good enough cuddle job that I don't notice being stabbed with a knife.
