F you.
I don’t know. like I seriously don’t know what I feel felt toward you. I like you and I care for you (else I won’t be your girlfriend). I try not to held grudges on you, but you make it hard for me.
You bastard. You fool. You jerk.
You think I’d be jealous, crying, and begging for your presence when you pull that cheap stunt on me? You should’ve thought better. I have class, baby boy. I won’t lose on a game that I am so good at playing.
I asked you. What are we? It took you a long and winding road just to answer with ‘honestly, I am confused’. Expected. Really. I’ve learnt not to expect much from you ever since the beginning. I even gave you the alternate answer ‘since you’re confused. let’s just be friends’. And you had the nerve to ask me ‘but, we can still be close, right?’ I answered with ‘define close’. ‘like we previously were’. Douchebag.
Do you think my heart made of cotton that won’t break? Do you think I acted the same way to every guys the same way you acted to every girls? If only you knew that I don’t give people the privilege to my life that easily. You should have known the way I treated you was different. I don’t talk about my day to everyone. yet I talked to you how my day went by. I showed you what I like. I told you what I dislike. It may seems useless to you, but it was everything for me. I’m not good at showing affection, but I know affection is not only about calling endearment and other cheesy stuffs.
You are afraid of heartbreak, you said. Such a coward I must say. Especially after I ‘saw’ what you did. Someone who is supposed to be afraid of heartbreak won’t be breaking other people’s hearts. You aren’t afraid of heartbreak; You are afraid of commitment.
At least now I know where I stand in your life.
Thank you for making me feel special, even I know that I’m not special in your eyes. You made me feel a lot of things within a short span of time. Jealousy, rage, loved, afraid, worried, disappointed, nervous, relieved, and all.
Dear Giant Toddler, you teach me one thing that I will remember forever. Don’t trust people so easily, especially when it comes to love and relationship. It takes a lot more than sweet talks to prove how serious people are.
I don’t hate you and I hope you won’t make me.