Oct 10, 2017
The scars that heal are always physical... The wounds of words fester and bleed over and over in the mind, in the heart... and the Sky cries for me, for the tears I've given up on long ago.
-- C. Ryan
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The scars that heal are always physical... The wounds of words fester and bleed over and over in the mind, in the heart... and the Sky cries for me, for the tears I've given up on long ago.
-- C. Ryan
Tomorrow
if I don’t wake up
do not cry
she had my heart
the day I die
TOMORROW
“The cuts got deeper”
and love goes further. as you all stand and cheer, i cower in fear, because my love can go no further.
the cuts get deeper as my insanity grows more, i can't stand to hear any knocks on my door, all because the demons grow nearer.
Am I your Circus Attraction?
Put me up on a stand Show me to the crowd Make me do tricks
Do they know what you do after the spotlight turns off? After the props and unicycles are put away? When the chains and whips come out?
You cover me with blankets to hide the truth The crowd won’t believe what they can’t see So they won’t believe the bruises are real
You put stuffing under my blankets to show I’m fat That you feed me every day and night When in reality, I haven’t had a full meal in months
To go with the lie, you put decorative tape and bracelets on my ankles Just for show, right? Underneath are welts from a whip
The seats are filled with audience members Kids, parents, elders eager to see the show Waiting for the entertainment to start
The tape, bracelets, stuffing, and blankets are put on The acrobats make sure that we are covered to hide the truth One last whip before walking out
The crowd gasps in awe as they see us Do we look beautiful together? Like how a ringmaster and his prize should look
The people suspect nothing You fooled them They will never know what does on after the curtain is closed and the spotlight is turned off
The Inevitable
The way he smiles The way he talks The way he acts I've fallen for those beautiful eyes The ones that hold you captive by their intensity In my world it's only him He would be the person I would die for The person I want to sit next to me on my porch when I'm 75 He would be my "kiss and ride" I want to be the only lady in his mind I want to be his first and last kiss I want to be his one and only love It's not fair to love him so much Only for him not to love me back I'm so utterly in love with him it hurts It hurts my heart It hurts me These things describe only 1 thing: The Inevitable And the inevitable is... I've fallen for him
To kill the demon inside
How to kill the demon inside without killing me
It is the pleasure I seek
To hold the Demon's cold heart
His blood is my fear
His bones are my mistakes
His heart is my fury
I squeeze his heart
Watching as my fear and fury drips out
I am cover with his blood
My being is now soaked with my fears
My own fury
Have I now won?
It was pleasure I sought
It is pleasure I have
I've killed what is inside without killing me
-S.A.L aka Another
The Beast
I swallowed the over sized pills Hoping they would do the deadly job As much as I was alone, I had something to help me achieve my mission I gave into my inner conflict, known as The Beast
I wasn’t resisting the fatigue overcoming me “Just a couple more minutes" The Beast said eagerly To be honest, in a sick way, I was happy that death was an option for me It was the only option I had left
I was drifting away slowly, from life itself My smile reached from ear to ear like a Chelsea smile that was never cut There is a reason to why I’ve attempted suicide But that is a secret only me and The Beast should know
-S.A.L aka Another
The Beast
I swallowed the over sized pills Hoping they would do the deadly job As much as I was alone, I had something to help me achieve my mission I gave into my inner conflict, known as The Beast
I wasn’t resisting the fatigue overcoming me “Just a couple more minutes" The Beast said eagerly To be honest, in a sick way, I was happy that death was an option for me It was the only option I had left
I was drifting away slowly, from life itself My smile reached from ear to ear like a Chelsea smile that was never cut There is a reason to why I’ve attempted suicide But that is a secret only me and The Beast should know
-S.A.L aka Another