#itsmapdg

[mprivpages]

No because every single one of my family members lost privileges to know anything going on in my romantic life lol.

[mprivpages]

No because try and touch me again and see wtf happens.

[mprivpages]

"I never speak my opinion unless asked"

*every 5 minutes*

"so what do you think about this?"

lol 🥰

[mprivpages]

I wonder if you told them all the same pretty things you told me. Did you talk about them being the mother of your kids? Did you introduce family to them too? Did they also envision a future with you because of a "feeling" you had about you two? I wonder if they also bet on a future where you guys lived together too. I don't know, but what's certain is that I'm probably not given another thought just like the rest of them. I feel so dumb. I think I'm more mad at myself than anything. Mad that I doubted you'd be just like everyone else. You got me good.

[mprivpages]

No, but fr, on a more positive note, I know that how I want to be treated does and can exist. I'll be with the right person soon...

[mprivpages]

The worst part is that I never wanted you to be anything. I had no real "expectations" of who you "should be." I literally just wanted you to choose me/us, but that was way too much, I guess.

[mprivpages]

Uh, yeah, I'm wearing his hoodie?? Like what? And I'm keeping it too lol tf

[mprivpages]

I have such conflicting feelings towards all of this. Part of me wishes that he experiences karma, but I also pray the best for him. At the same time, I have faith that God has my back and that he don't play about me, but also I hope that it isn't too overwhelming or bad for him. Sigh. I feel bad for even experiencing these emotions. But everything is conflicting, just like my feelings for him. I’m hurt, disappointed, caring, and angry all at once. The worst part is that there's the tiniest part of me that's hopeful still. It’s like my heart wants peace for both of us while also wanting my pain to be acknowledged somehow.