I just don't understand...
what is going on inside me.
one minute I'm depressed over what's happened with/to me.
then im okay.
I want to make up with him and pretend like everythings okay.
I see all the good memories we had (more good than bad)
then i think about what's recently happen, then I hate again.
not him, i think.
just for what's happened, why?
then i have a good friend whom is awesome, i like him a bit because hes cute and nerdy and just really nice. we can talk about a lot of things because we have so much in common. he confessed he liked me and wants to go out with me, sometime. But i dont have the heart to tell him that its not gonna happen. not because i dont like him, i do but not as strong as I ever did with koi and hero.
and i dont want him to think its because i see him as just a friend, its because i'm done believing in what guys say. I went for the bad guy, he hurt me. I went for the good guy, he hurt me even more. so then, what's the difference between the good and bad guys? nothing.
I just dont want to get hurt so I'm done with this. I hope he understands, its not him, it's what's happened to me and because of what's happened to me, it's changed me. I'm sorry, but it is what it is.