She says it's for the best. Not Stephanie, Stephanie doesn't say that. Not in her own voice, in her mother's echoing throughout her head. It's for the best.
And she compares him to her father. But it's in all the ways they aren't alike, like the way he cares about his little sister and doesn't lock her in closets when she gets upset or the way he shares his money with the people who mean something to him.
And she meant something to him. It makes it worse. So much worse because she can feel the betrayal inside her like a cancer, growing every day she stays away from him because "it's for the best" (her mother says).
She doesn't stay in costume and some nights doesn't even touch it. She'll dress in black or purple, with hoods that mask her face. They're suffocating now, after wearing a cowl for so long, and the fabric is heavy and hot. But she can't be Batgirl while she feels like such a villain.
She has a reason and she keeps repeating it. Whenever she starts to wander in his area, wishing to see his face she does and it's the vengeful, hateful, frightening face of a cold-hearted murderer. It stops her cold and she retreats again. It's only been a week. Two? But she's afraid of him. Not him, of what he could be. That monster she never believed in, a boogeyman made real. He has the right intentions but-
She's losing it, losing herself, in this relationship. She's seeing the world through his eyes and she used to like it, felt understood but she doesn't want that anymore, doesn't want that anger. Past choices she was okay with, Roman deserved it, are haunting her. Was she a good person? Was it worth it?
And she doesn't know. She thought so.
But it's her mother's voice inside her head. "It's for the best," her mother said. "It's for the best." But inside her soul was grey and dead.