love after the silence - jay ff
tags :: argument, made out, fluff, a bit spicy¿, couple, working partner, kisses, cozy, soft spoken, happy end, cuddles, love
jay and you had been together for a long time.
you went through ups and downs like every couple, but somehow you always managed to fix things, to find your way back to each other.
it was never easy, especially with his overwhelming work. he’s been going through a stressful phase, which you completely understand but sometimes you wish he would spend more time with you and give you more attention.
that’s why this evening felt different.
jay came back after six days of work-related meetings in a different city.
you heard a knocking sound on the door and jumped out of excitement. you didn’t even realize how much you missed him until you saw him standing there with a bouquet. he looks a bit tired but he’s smiling the moment his eyes found yours. his bag dropped to the floor and the next second his arms were already around you, pulling you close like he needed to make sure you were actually there.
you missed his smell that felt like home, his hands around your waist pulling you closer without even thinking about it, his chin resting on your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck.
him.
“missed you,” he mumbled into your hair, pressing you even harder against him.
you smiled against his chest. “yeah? didn’t seem like it with those dry texts.”
he let out a small laugh, pulling back grabbing your chin.
“i was busy, y/n.”
“mhm,” you hummed, rolled your eyes but you were still smiling.
everything felt normal again.
—
it started small. it always does.
you were sitting together on the couch. tv running, your legs resting on his lap. his hands stroking your legs gently. talking, but something felt slightly off. you couldn’t even explain it properly. just the way he answered you, short, distracted not fully focused in your words.
“why are you being like that?” you asked, frowning a little.
“like what?” he replied, not even looking at you properly. like he tries to avoid eye contact with you.
“distant.” you completed your sentence. sharp. short.
he sighed, taking his hands off you. the warmth disappeared instantly as he leaned back, and your legs slowly slipped off his lap, hitting the couch.
for a second, neither of you said anything.
“y/n, i just got back.”
“yeah, and you’re acting like you don’t even wanna be here. did you even miss me?” you replied furrowing your brows.
that made him look at you.
really look at you. but his eyes looked empty. like he really doesn’t want to deal with this right now.
“y/n, are you serious right now?”
“i’m just saying how it feels jay.”
“i’ve been working for six days straight and the first thing you do is complain?” he covered his face with his hands.
you crossed your arms. “i’m not complaining, i’m trying to communicate.”
“no, you’re starting something for no reason, like always.”
that something inside you snapped. you just wanted to talk about how you felt. that’s it.
but somehow, every time you tried, he took it like an attack.like you were blaming him. like you were starting a fight on purpose.
you shook your head slightly, frustration building up again.
“oh so now i’m the problem?”
“i didn’t say that but—”
“you basically did.” you cut him.
his jaw tightened, lips pressed together. “you’re twisting my words.”
“and you’re avoiding the point.”
the air changed. fast. at this point you two are stinging each other. what started as nothing turned into something bigger before either of you could stop it.
voices getting louder, words sharper, both of you talking over each other instead of actually listening. fighting against each other rather than fighting together against the problem.
it wasn’t even about what started it anymore.
it was about everything. the way he behaved. the way he doesn’t listen to you anymore.
he got up and left the living room. left this mess in the living room. left you in that living room. you didn’t even try to stop him. you were annoyed, how can someone be that selfish?
—
hours passed like that.
you were in the shower, letting the water run over you, trying to wash off everything from earlier, the tension, the frustration, him. like maybe if you stood there long enough, your thoughts would quiet down too.
but they didn’t. if anything, they got louder. you pressed your hands against the wall, head slightly lowered as the water kept running. and then it hit you.
the heaviness in your chest.
the kind that makes your throat tighten before you even realize you’re crying. you let out a shaky breath.
“am i so hard to understand?” you whispered to yourself. “why is he never getting my point…”
when you were done showering and got ready for bed, you finally laid down. you pulled the blanket over yourself, scrolling through tiktok just to get your mind on something anything else.
no matter how many videos you watched, nothing really stuck. your thoughts kept slipping back to earlier his voice, his words, the silence after. so you put your phone away and tried to close your eyes.
the room was dim. outside, you could hear cars passing by, distant and constant, like the world was still moving normally even if yours didn’t feel like it.
but the air in your room still felt heavy. and suddenly, the door opens.
jay stepped into the room quietly, acted like nothing happened few hours ago. you didn’t even try to glance at him.
you felt the mattress dip as he sat down, then shifted closer. slowly, carefully, he slid under the blanket next to you. you could feel his fragrance building up beside you.
familiar. warm. jay.
you still didn’t move. didn’t even look at him. silence.
it stretched out between you two, thick and uncomfortable, but neither of you broke it right away until he let out a quiet breath.
then at some point, he couldn’t take it anymore.
“so we’re just gonna ignore this?”
you didn’t even turn around. “there’s nothing to talk about.”
“there is, y/n.” you felt him staring at you.
“i’m tired jay.” you groaned.
“yeah? me too. of this.”
you scoffed quietly. “then go to sleep.”
“you’re unbelievable.”
“and you’re annoying.”
like little kids, both of you wanted to have the last word. it wasn’t loud anymore. but somehow that made it worse.
he ran a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated, then stood up.
“you know what,” he muttered, grabbing a pillow from the bed. “i’m sleeping on the couch. don’t annoy me.”
you swallowed, but you didn’t let it show. you didn’t want to sleep alone, especially because you still miss him, you needed his warmth.
“okay. go. i don’t care.” you lied, to him and to yourself.
he paused at the door. just for a second. like he was waiting, like he wanted you to say something, stop him, anything.
you didn’t. so he left. the door shut behind him, and the sound echoed more than it should have. and suddenly, the room felt way too empty.
you lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, your chest feeling tight for no reason you wanted to admit.
—
time passed, slowly.
you turned from one side to the other, unable to sleep, your thoughts running in circles. replaying everything.
over and over again.
—
2 a.m.
you somehow fell asleep. probably because you were so emotionally tired and done with your nerves.
the door opens slowly. jay steps in, careful not to make a sound. he pauses when he sees you on the bed. you’re completely sprawled out arms, legs, everything taking over the space like you own it.
he exhales through his nose.
“unbelievable… how such a small person can take up the entire bed,” he mutters under his breath.
he stands there for a second longer, just looking at you. your face is relaxed now. no frustration, no tension. just sleep. he runs a hand through his hair.
“you leave me no other choice,” he says quietly. “i’m not sleeping on that couch again, it’s so uncomfortable.”
carefully, he climbs onto the bed and sits at the edge for a moment, watching you. then he shifts closer.
“you basically took all the pillows too,” he adds under his breath. slowly, he lifts your shirt just slightly, not enough to wake you, just enough to get comfortable. then lays down, resting his head carefully on your stomach.
a long, tired exhale leaves him. like he’s been holding everything in all day and finally let it go.
right before he fully falls asleep, while feeling your stomach going up and down you suddenly flinch hard.
your body jerks awake instantly, shock snapping through you as you realize someone is literally lying on you. i mean who wouldn’t flinch?
jay lifts his head up to you immediately, blinking.
“y/n calm down, it’s me.”
you stare at him, disoriented. “jay… what the hell are you doing on top of me?”
“do you even know how uncomfortable our couch is?you took the whole bed including the pillows. i had no space to rest except here.”
you push his shoulder lightly. “get off me.”
“no,” he says without hesitation, then softens a little. “just… stay like that. i’m tired.”
“jay, i am serious,” you push his shoulder again. “here, take that pillow.”
“no. leave it there,” he says, completely unbothered. then after a beat, “i heard skin-to-skin contact helps people fall asleep faster.”
you let out a quiet laugh, knowing that’s the worst excuse you’ve ever heard. there’s a short silence.
the kind that doesn’t feel as heavy anymore.
then jay shifts slightly, still resting on you.
“why did you even let me sleep there?” he asks suddenly. “why didn’t you stop me?”
you blink at the ceiling. “why should i stop you?” you reply honestly.
he hums like he doesn’t have an answer for that.
another pause.
then he turns his head slightly to look up at you.
“do you want to know something?” he says. “next time you can sleep on the coach and i will take the bed.”
you immediately push his shoulder again.
“stop talking nonsense.”
he laughs under his breath, low and tired. you do too. for a moment, it actually feels… okay.
then your smile fades a little.
“you know,” you say quietly, eyes still on the ceiling, “it did hurt me earlier. i feel like you don’t really understand me sometimes.”
the air shifts slightly again, but not in a bad way this time. jay goes quiet and takes your hand.
you play with a strand of his hair while you wait for him to response.
“i’m sorry,” he says finally, softer now. “i’ve just been really stressed with work. and i think i’ve been… bad at handling everything. including you.”
you glance at him. he looks up to you. you could see the moon reflecting in his sparkly eyes.
“i don’t want you to feel like that,” he continues. “i’ll try to understand you better y/n. properly.”
silence again but lighter. you nod slowly.
your hand, which had been in his hair a moment ago, slowly slides down to his cheek. you pinch it softly.
“you better,” you mumble, trying to sound annoyed but your voice comes out softer than you intended.
jay lets out a quiet breath through his nose, almost a laugh, his eyes closing for a second under your touch.
„come here babe, i don’t want the night to end with a fight“ he says and gets completely on top of you. one hand under your waist the other grabbing you jaw.
you flustered, your heart beats faster, you’ve been waiting for this moment. he holds your jaw gently strokes your cheek with his thumb and leans in for a kiss. you rest your hands behind his head.
the kiss got more and more passionate, a bit messier. it’s clear you both missed each other way too much. your hands slip under his shirt making him fold.
„i love you y/n, so much“ he moaned softly.
“i love you too jay”
and finally the night turned out exactly how you two imagined it. everything felt easier. everything felt lighter.