8 Books I Read Growing Up: A Poem

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8 Books I Read Growing Up: A Poem
Dances Up Earthquakes's big 7-card Earth Shudders, Buildings Fall turn.
Event Card: Relentless Optimism
"For the rest of this turn, don't generate Fear for Destroying Towns/Cities."
The invaders as their towns and cities collapse around them:
I saw this while browsing Tumblr tags and then proceeded to waste twelve hours putting this together because 1) the original template had a lot of jpg artifacts and I decided to try to clean it up a bit, 2) I got really obsessed with making things align as nicely as possible, and 3) I did all this in Microsoft Paint so that was hell.
Jazelock: so
Jazelock: my spotify
Jazelock: is just stuck on this episode of Magnus Archives
Jazelock: like no matter what else I play
Jazelock: it just keeps saying it's that episode
Jazelock: and the playtime keeps going up past the actual total runtime of the episode
Jazelock: it's currently at 50:46 out of 28:14
Jazelock: I find this appropriately spoopy
I am fishing on the dock of The Finest Trading Post. The sky is lit by Captain Flameheart's grinning visage. Howling spectres fly overhead, smashing into the roof of the shop, the dock. One ghoulish face screams right past mine. I crane my neck so I can see past it to watch the fish on my line. The dock is in flames. Derrick looks at me in despair. My ship untouched, I continue to fish.
Me: A world in which you can only change your name by taking the name of someone you kill
Friend: you better hope your parents dont name you something cool
Friend: like Pants Mulligan
Me: That's a very nice sounding name you have there.
Me: Would you like to come look at my wine cellar?
Friend: Oh yes
Friend: as an aside, have I ever told you how I feel about someone building a wall around me and trapping me until death?
Me: No, I don't believe you have.
Friend: Bad
Me: Well, I'm very sorry to hear that.
Me: I certainly hope nothing like that happens to you in the near future of the next hour.
Jesus turned around, and said to Judas, “Oh, it’s you.”
How I want to die: buried alive behind a cellar wall after being lured down there with the promise of Amontillado Tumblr posts.