Discover Top Posts Tagged with #jet_thuman

I AM PRINCE OF EVERYTHING, LORD OF LAND AND MAIN, EXCEPT FOR MY PUBLIC WHOSE FAITHFUL SERVANT I REMAIN.

#idol hands #SoundCloud #jet_thuman #pulsinella #majjyklieph #You_Why

I AM PRINCE OF EVERYTHING, LORD OF LAND AND MAIN, EXCEPT FOR MY PUBLIC WHOSE FAITHFUL SERVANT I REMAIN.

#idol hands #SoundCloud #jet_thuman #pulsinella #majjyklieph #You_Why

i SHALL talk my shit !

#idol hands #SoundCloud #jet_thuman #pulsinella #majjyklieph #You_Why

i thought i die

I’m standing at the door and my guide, a 7-foot-tall eskimo, is pointing at the doorknob with his leather-mittened hand. He smiles warmly at me. I am unsure about the situation. I do not know what I want. I turn around to see if there is an exit. There is only a wall. I reach for the doorknob, thinking only of what I have left behind. The metal is warm as if I am only one of many that have passed through here. I glance at the eskimo once more for assurance. He nods.

I turn the knob and push. The door does not budge. I look at the eskimo, perplexed. He rolls his eyes and makes a pulling motion with his hands.

I pull open the door slowly and peek inside.

The room is huge. There is a large shelf full of books, movies, and video games. To the left of that is a sexy-ass computer. I hurry to check the internet connection; ultra-broadband, and it downloads gigs of porn in seconds. I visit eBaumsworld. Every post is not a repost.

“Hey there,”

I spin around, startled. There is a girl sitting in an awesomely comfy couch, smoking what looks like a cannabis cigarette. She waves me over.

I sit next to her.

“Welcome.”

She is not ugly. She is not homely. She is just beautiful. I find her more than sexually attractive. She offers the spliff to me. I decline.

“Well, do you wanna play some games then? I’m kind of bored since I’ve been waiting on you forever.”

She shows me the extensive collection available. Anything that could be called a video game is in there, ready to be played.

I decline this offer as well, shaking my head again.

“Well, that’s all right I guess… Geez, you just wanna sit around staring at all the cool shit?”

I take another look around. There is, indeed, a lot of cool shit.

“Hmm… Maybe you just need a little house-warming gift.”

She puts down the spliff in an ashtray and moves over to me. She crawls across the couch on all fours and pulls me into a warm embrace. My face is in her tits. Her right hand glides down to my crotch while she holds my head to her chest with the other. Long story short, there’s some sex.

I’m pretty happy.

Afterward, she turns on the huge television. My dead body pops up on the screen. I can see my fatal wounds and flies buzzing around my corpse. Some maggots have begun to inhabit my decomposing chest. The telltale signs of empty bowels are very evident. I’m pretty disgusted at this point.

At the bottom of the screen I see:

Respawning in 0:10

0:09

0:08

“Will I be back?”

The girl nods her head and gives me a kiss on the cheek.

0:07

0:06

“Will I remember this at all?”

0:05

0:04

“Nope, but you’ll get to stay even longer next time.”