#john mctaggart

[butterfliebandage]

time isn't real ((but this eyeliner is))

[petersill-conceivedmusings]

I am not very familiar with this guy's work, but I think I generally agree with him. Let's sketch it out, shall we? And perhaps imagine how he arrived at his own conclusion. (Assuming he was half-eaten by a honey badger half-way through his ground-breaking philosophical discovery.) Prove the following: Time does not exist. Given: time is not a tangible thing that can be measured conventionally

Given: the tangible device used to measure time (watch, e.g.) runs at a constant rate, and from that constant rate, a time appears on the display Given: if we extrapolate further, we discover that our entire basis for time is derived from naturally occurring rates (normally the rate at which our planet revolves around a star, though other naturally recurring rates can be used to "measure" time)         In other words, while d=rt, d/r=t is the more fundamental formula.Therefore, time itself is a derivative (though not in the precise calculus definition of the word) of rate and distance, not the other way around, as I would have been inclined to believe before intense critical analysis. Socratic question: Is the universe any different after time passes? Socratic answer: Yes, assuming there is kinetic energy in the universe  (i.e. parts of the universe are warmer than 0 K, absolute zero), I'd have to concede that particles are always moving and making shit happen...BUT Secondary socratic question designed to get to the bottom of what I was trying to get at with my preliminary socratic question, but failed to achieve because of a lack of sharply precise specificity: If nothing happens in the universe across a certain span of time (i.e. the entire universe's contents are playing statues because there is 0 kinetic energy in the world), "what is the result?", Socrates asks. "Well everything everywhere would stay exactly the same," Plato would succinctly answer. "Right you are, young Harry," Socrates answers in a Mr. Weasley voice. "So, if time supposedly passes, but nothing about the universe changes at ALL, what is the watch measuring exactly?" Socrates asks excitedly and expectantly, knowing his student isn't far from the conclusion. "Well, I guess in this specific instance, nothing." Plato responds calmly. 2.5 seconds pass; the Plato explodes, "SHIT. NOTHING! TIME EXISTS NOT! EUREKA! OR RATHER, THE OPPOSITE OF EUREKA SINCE I HAVE NOT FOUND SOMETHING, BUT LOST SOMETHING--THE ILLUSION THAT TIME EXISTS. But, Socrates, I wanna have a Eureka moment. Ya know, like Archimedes and Colin Singleton--the greats." Smiling to himself, Socrates looks down at the boy, and says, "Well, son, the truth resists simplicity, and the notion that life is simply a young adult novel folding before our very eyes, or else an anachronistic narrative, failing to take into account the fact that Archimedes is nothing more than a random pattern of disassociated atoms scattered through the atmosphere right now, is a gross misunderstanding and oversimplification of whatever this is that's going on here. Get your shit straight man. And besides all the best Eureka moments happen when you're naked, and you are decidedly wearing a toga two tummies too tiny. Speaking of which, that toga really clings to your muscular, if somewhat boyish, figure. It is the 5th century BCE after all. We could, ya know..." Let's end it there before their vaguely paternalistic, philosophical relationship turns into something more eyebrow-raising. Did I just fall into the classic booby-trap of fan fic sexy time? Though the ancient Greek fan (non)-fiction variety thereof. Boy, if you ever talk to me after 4am, be forewarned. My mind is evidently a twisting, turning mess of contrived logic, socratic dialogues, and fan fiction fantasies (for gay classics majors?). So do *you* think time exists?