➸ request from anon: johnny scenario where he vlogs your whole pregnancy of jude (stomach growing, cravings)
➸ note; thank u so so much for requesting this <33 it’s very very long so i hope u dont mind lol
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Ok right of the bat let me just say I don’t think this would be shared
I feel like he would make it as a sort of keepsake for you both, and of course Jude when he’s older
I feel like Johnny would want to keep it as a memory that he could always go back to,, I feel like he loves to do that
He gets the idea to start about three weeks in, it kind of just comes to him
‘Let me take a photo of you,’ Johnny says as you’re getting ready for bed.
‘Why?’ You respond, confused.
‘I want to take a photo of you every week,’ he explains, ‘then when you have them we can put them all together and just look back on it in the future.’
You comply, rolling up your shirt.
Your stomach is pretty much unchanged, but he just snaps a quick photo regardless.
‘Pretty,’ he muses, while you climb back into your shared bed.
A lot of your first trimester was just stressful tbh full of meetings with SM and trying to figure out the best way forward, as well as the sickness that Johnny would try his best to help you through, tying up your hair and bringing you water
Johnny only wanted to capture the happy moments bc i feel like we all know that’s what he loves to do the most
Johnny only wanted to capture the happy moments bc i feel like we all know that’s what he loves to do the most
Which is also why he never records telling the members because it honestly took place in the form of a meeting and was a genuinely serious conversation
You honestly don’t really notice him recording much at first
A lot of what he does is make voice recordings when he talks to the baby,,,
Sometimes when he feels demotivated or burnt out when practicing he often listens to them to feel better change my mind <3
He puts down a camera in the clinic which films a lot of your first scan, filming you having the cold gel put on your stomach and the way you shiver.
‘It’s so cold,’ you turn to Johnny, who chuckles softly.
‘You’ll get used to it soon,’ the nurse smiles, producing the ultrasound want from seemingly out of nowhere and resting it on your stomach
At first, all you see is grey on the screen, the outline of your uterus materialising gradually
‘Lets try and find them,’ the nurse murmurs, moving the probe around more, spreading the gel around a bit.
‘Wow,’ Johnny gasps, the silhouette of your baby come into view.
‘There they are,’ the nurse narrates.
Johnny is close to tears, unable to tear his eyes away from the monitor, while your face contorts into one of absolute amazement and just pure love
The nurse giggles at your stunned silence
At this point Johnny is basically sobbing he feels so happy and overwhelmed and feels just complete for the first time in a while
Of course several screenshots are taken of the ultrasound and you hang onto a copy of it to eventually send to Johnny’s parents once they know
There’s a series of clips of your symptoms, including you shoving massive amounts of ice cream into your mouth, sleeping like a baby in Johnny’s arms with tear tracks all down your cheeks and eventually the sight of a twelve week bump finally rearing it’s head
‘Okay, are you ready?’ Johnny asks you, camera pointed at the screen of the laptop, which had zoom open.
‘Ready as I’ll ever be,’ your hands are shaking wildly, and you gulp loudly.
‘We’re going to be just fine, baby…’ he reassures you, leaning across to kiss the side of your head and then tilting your chin to catch your lips
Your head is resting on Johnny’s shoulder when his parents answer the video call
‘Hello you two,’ Johnny’s mother beams,
‘Hey! Mom! Dad!’ Johnny grins back, and you cant find any words to say due to your nerves
You remain silent for a few moments to allow the family to greet each other, but then eventually his parent’s attention turns to you.
‘Oh, Y/N, how are you?’ Johnny’s mom asks you, and your stomach turns
‘I’m good, thank you,’ you force a smile.
‘You look beautiful,’ she comments, ‘you’re almost…. glowing.’
‘Thank you,’ you smile more genuinely this time, considering for the last twelve weeks you’ve been feeling like shit.
‘Anyway, what’s this about?’ Johnny’s dad questions, ‘why did you both need to talk to us?’
‘Well…’ Johnny starts, grabbing your hand off screen and squeezing it, ‘we both have something that we want to tell you.’
‘You’re not engaged- are you?’ his mother gasps.
’No, no, it’s not that,’ Johnny shakes his head.
‘Y/N is- well, we’re going to be having a baby...’
You panic at the silence that comes after Johnny’s words, but eventually it is filled with his mother squeaking out a ‘you’re pregnant?’
You nod, chewing on the bottom of your lip anxiously.
‘Oh my god, are you really?’
’Show them,’ Johnny murmurs, and you stand up, rolling up your shirt so that your bump is on show.
Johnny’s mother squeals once again, while his dad just grins.
‘Congratulations!’ They’re both seem absolutely thrilled which hugely calms you down.
‘I knew it when I saw you!’ His mother exclaims when you sit down, ‘like I said, you’re glowing!’
’Thank you,’ you smile sheepishly.
You can’t help but notice how they haven’t even mentioned the company/Johnny’s career and it just felt so nice to just focus on something else for once
The next day you send a copy of the ultrasound photo in the mail <3
‘Y/N, would you like to tell the camera why we’re going through the Mcdonald’s drive through at two-thirty in the morning?’
You glare at Johnny, taking his words as annoyance.
‘Well, it’s your fault I’m fucking pregnant isn’t it,’ you huff, ‘I just want an Oreo McFlurry, but you have to give me all that cheek like it’s MY fault-’
Johnny just shoots the camera a look.
The scene changes to you two parked in the Mcdonald’s car park, you holding your ice cream and eating it quietly.
You can see your growing bump clearly through your leggings, and Johnny takes a moment to admire it.
‘You look so pretty like this,’ he hums, and you stare at him through your half lidded eyes.
You’re too tired to argue, too tired to point out all of the ugly things that have come with your pregnancy, so you just lean across the console (with some effort) and kiss him on the lips before resting your head in his neck.
‘Thank you for driving me here so late.’
‘It’s my pleasure,’ he kisses your head, ‘I’d do anything for you, and them.’
‘Can you believe we get to find out what they are next week?’
‘I know,’ Johnny shakes his head in disbelief, ‘this… it’s gone so fast.’
You nod in agreement, ‘I think it’s a boy.’
‘Really?’ He says, eyes widening slightly.
‘Yep. I just have a feeling that our baby will look exactly like you.’
‘I haven’t really thought about it… I’ve been too focused on figuring out how I’m going to be a good dad.’
You remove your head from his shoulder, shoving your now empty ice cream cup into the drink holder.
‘John Suh, you have practically raised several of your members, what makes you think that you can’t do it now?’
‘This is different,’ he sighs, ‘I’m literally responsible for a human life here…’
‘You took care of Mark,’ you point out, ‘you took care of Ten, helped him learn Korean and adapt and grow into a brand new country where he knew nothing. You can do the exact same thing with our son or daughter.’
There’s a silence as he considers your words, before he sighs softly, ‘I can’t wait to meet them. I promise I’ll always be there-’
‘I know you will be. I trust you.’
‘Thank you. I love you both with all of my heart.’
‘We love you too. Now, we would love you even more if you could take us through the drive-thru again and get another McFlurry.’
Johnny just laughs lowly, putting the key in the ignition and turning it, so the car flares to life once again, ‘only because I love you.’
The scene changes, and once again you’re sitting in the car, except this time it’s daytime.
‘We’re on the way to the doctors right now,’ you narrate, sweaty palms quite clearly kneading Johnny’s hands, ‘time to find out whether you’re a boy or a girl.’
‘Everyone is pretty sure you’re a boy,’ Johnny says, ‘I’m still not sure.’
‘Well you’ll know in an hour anyway,’ you deadpan, ‘and you’ll see that I’m right.’
‘Whatever you say,’ he grins.
‘I’ve been wondering recently what they’re going to think when they watch this video in the future,’ you tell Johnny.
‘Don’t say that,’ he shudders, ‘I’m just imagining them to be all grown up and that’s scary.’
‘They’ll be all grown up when they watch this,’ you point out.
‘Well hey, grown up baby Suh, hope we didn’t completely fuck you up-‘
‘Sorry,’ he chuckles, ‘I hope they’re laughing.’
The video cuts to a new scene, a very blindingly white one, where you’re laying on a bed in the doctor’s office.
‘Are you ready Y/N?’ The nurse asks, applying the familiar gel to your stomach.
‘As ready as I’ll ever be,’ you reply, eyes squeezing shut at the coldness, trying to focus on the way Johnny plays with your hair.
Johnny’s parents are on facetime, waiting in anticipation to hear the results.
The nurse spends a few minutes showing you the ways in which the baby has grown, playing the heartbeat for you and just generally checking things over.
’Now for the moment I know you’ve been waiting for,’ she says, which earns chuckles from all four of you.
She spends about a minute moving the wand around, clearly trying to find the right angle to check
‘Ok, I can see now,’ the Nurse says, ‘you ready?’
‘Just say it!’ Johnny’s mother yells from the phone, making the rest of you crack up.
‘It very much appears that you’re having a baby boy.’
‘A boy,’ Johnny echos, kissing your forehead repeatedly as you tear up.
You can hear Johnny’s parents hollering and clapping through the screen.
‘I told you,’ you whisper, laughing through the tears, ‘I knew it would be.’
‘You were right, angel..’
‘Aren’t you happy?’ You ask, noticing that he hasn’t said anything yet.
‘Incredibly,’ he’s choked up, the words get caught in his throat, ‘love you both so so much.’
The scene changes to you in a shop, looking intensively at a stuffed giraffe.
Johnny turns the camera to himself, and you can see the way his mask is pulled up to below his eyes, black Chicago Cubs cap also pulled down so that his eyes are shielded.
He tries to make a face at the camera, but questions whether or not you could tell.
‘John, what do you think?’ You ask quietly, holding up a white bear, ‘should we get the white one, the grey one, or the blue one? I feel as though if we get the white then that will make his bedroom too bright and then he won’t be able to sleep, and the blue feels almost sexist, in a way-‘
’Don’t stress yourself out, angel,’ Johnny murmurs quietly, ‘it’s not that huge of a deal… but if you’re asking me, get the grey. It’ll look nice with the white bedding.’
You sigh deeply, switching the white bear for the grey one, ‘you’re right. How did I not see that before.’
‘What can I say,’ he shrugs, ‘I’m just incredible at interior design.’
‘I hope you feel the same way when you build the rest of the furniture with Jaehyun and Ten this weekend.’
‘You had no choice, I can’t exactly do it myself, can I?’
Johnny just laughs quietly.
‘Also, Jude, yes I am talking about your uncles-‘
‘I didn’t realise we had settled on Jude,’ Johnny interrupts.
‘Oh, uh, yeah right. Force of habit. It just feels right to say.’
‘He does feel like a Jude, I agree, but I think we need to explore some more options.’
’Not John Jr again,’ you whine, ‘I’m telling you, it sounds like a euphemism.’
‘Okay, fine, Jude it is.’
‘Really?’ You squeal, trying not to literally jump for joy.
‘Yeah,’ Johnny grins, ‘I love it.’
‘Yay!’ you clap, grabbing his shoulder to steady yourself to give him a massive kiss on the cheek (where his mask wasn’t covering), ‘thank you.’
The video changes to you two laying on your shared bed, Johnny’s head resting against your twenty week bump.
You can clearly see the way your skin pulses as Jude kicks from inside of you.
‘John, look, you can see the shape of his foot,’ you point out, prodding the area where he last kicked.
‘I can see,’ Johnny turns his head to kiss the area softly, making a light pecking sound.
You haven’t noticed that he’s filming, so you’re just absentmindedly kneading your fingers through his hair, occasionally wincing and jumping as Jude delivered a particularly hard kick.
Johnny feels utterly blissful. The rest of the world has just melted away, and it’s only you two left.
He falls asleep on your lap, the video clip ending with you finding the camera and turning it off.
The image cuts off, and is replaced with Johnny sitting in a dark room, white glow of the laptop screen the only light.
‘Your mom is asleep in the other room,’ he says quietly, looking straight into the camera lens, ’so I’m going to try to be quiet.’
He clicks around on his laptop for a bit, typing quickly.
‘I am… currently booking plane tickets,’ he explains, while he waits for the website to load.
‘One way. One for me and one for your mother, to Chicago, where you’re going to be born.’
Again he’s silent for a while, eyebrows cocked in concentration.
‘We’re going to go about three and a half weeks before your due date, then we’ll probably come back when you’re six weeks old. Wait, will I have to book a plane ticket for you? I should probably find that out.’
’The fact that we’re going to have the same hometown,’ he bites his lip and shakes his head, ‘makes me so so so happy.’
‘And you’re going to meet your grandma and grandpa right away!’
You had both agreed that you would travel to Chicago in order to have Jude; it was the place where most of the family was, the people that he wanted to be surrounded by when his first child was born, and most importantly, it was away from all of the craziness of Korea.
The company had asked him to begin writing the famous handwritten note all SM idols do
He somewhat dreaded the response, but tried very hard to not show you this, as to not worry you even more
You could tell that there was something on his mind but you assumed it was just general nerves
Some time passes before Johnny eventually turns back to the camera, ‘okay, that’s our tickets booked. Just waiting on you now, little man.’
He smiles tiredly, reaching an arm out to turn off the camera.
‘Y/N?’ Mark asks, gingerly approaching you where you’re standing against the wall in the hallway.
‘Yes?’ You ask tiredly, moving your head from where it rested on your hand.
‘Are you feeling ok? Johnny sent me to check on you.’
‘I’m fine,’ you choke out.
It was comeback season, Johnny’s last before going on a mini-hiatus for the sake of you and Jude.
You’d been feeling sick all day, dizziness and general sickness plaguing your whole body.
You noticed the way the members treated you, almost as if you’d break if they came near you.
‘We’re having a difficult day today, Jude,’ Johnny narrates, ‘your mama’s here, supporting me, but we’re… feeling a bit sick.’
You curl into his body, wrapping an arm around him.
He kisses your head, ‘do you need to sit down?’
‘Okay,’ Johnny turns off his camera.
‘You can lay down on that couch if you want,’ a staff member tells you when you sit down, sinking into the cushions.
‘I’m fine,I’m fine,’ you mumble, not wanting to be a burden.
Another staff member was around to take care of you, bringing you things if you needed them, but you tried hard to not bother her.
‘We need to get you guys to the stage now,’ yet another staff member appears in the doorway, wearing a huge bulky headset.
‘See you later, Y/N,’ each of the members wave at you, Johnny pursuing a discreet kiss to your forehead.
‘We’re about to tell the world about you, Judey,’ Johnny mumbles at the camera, days later.
‘When are they posting it?’ You ask off screen.
‘At six,’ he answers, turning around so that you’re on screen.
You’re fondly cradling your bump underneath your white flowy shirt. You’ve actually gotten up today, bothering to dress somewhat nicely.
‘And it’s five fifty-eight now.’
‘Oh,’ you say dejectedly, and Johnny plops down on the couch next to you.
‘How are you feeling?’ He asks, resting his head on your shoulder.
‘Petrified,’ you sigh, ‘but it’s got to be done, I guess.’
‘We’ll be just fine,’ Johnny tries to reassure you.
‘I’m just scared of what people might say-‘
‘We’ve sent the post out now,’ a member of staff calls, and you feel almost like you’re going to begin hyperventilating.
‘You know what,’ Johnny springs to his feet, holding out a hand, ‘turn off your phone, let’s go for a drive.’
The next clip is of you, from a considerable distance, but of you.
You were sitting on a bench facing a view, holding a bottle of water.
You’d stopped off at a viewpoint, and Johnny had walked off to pa the parking meter.
‘Your mom is so pretty Jude,’ Johnny mutters under his breath to the camera, ‘appreciate her.’
The screen changes again.
Johnny flops down on your shared bed, looking deeply exhausted.
There’s an open suitcase next to his head, filled with a few baby grows, but mostly your own clothes.
‘We’re packing for Chicago,’ he grins, ‘we’re flying out in… four days. Four days.’
‘I am… scared… but it’s okay.’
‘I hope you’re excited too… and ready to come and meet us safely. I should probably keep packing.’
Johnny covers the camera with his hand, thinking to himself about how much of a vlogger he’s turning into.
‘It’s d-day,’ Johnny announces to the camera, which is sitting on the airport floor, tilted up at him.
‘Your mom is in the bathroom, of course. Our flight leaves in about an hour.’
Johnny had spent a lot of money thinking about you flying. He wanted to make sure that you were completely comfortable the whole time.
He’d booked two seats right next to each other, you know the ones that like recline and make like a double bed
Anyway you watch some movies together and you eventually decide to go to sleep
Night falls and Johnny can’t help but notice how peaceful you look
Eventually he gets bored himself and goes to sleep, slinging an arm around you.
‘Okay, we have landed,’ Johnny narrates, leaning against a railing outside the airport terminal.
Your head is leaning against his shoulder, eyes slowly drooping shut then reopening.
‘We’ve been through customs and everything- Y/N, how are you feeling?’
‘Tired,’ you reply, ‘as soon as we get to your parents house…. I’m falling asleep on the guest bed. With some chocolate cookies, preferably.’
‘So that’s that,’ Johnny deadpans.
The next video was the two of you in the backseat of his parents’ car.
You were fast asleep on Johnny’s shoulder, and Johnny is playing with your fingers with his spare hand
His mother is chatting away, practically attacking Johnny with questions
Johnny doesn’t pick up the camera again until later that night.
He’s sitting on the end of the bed, you’re half asleep in the background.
‘We’re getting settled in here,’ Johnny mumbles, just loud enough for the camera to actually pick up.
‘John, he’s kicking,’ you call, and Johnny immediately turns around to place a hand on your stomach.
Naturally, since you had been flying for several hours you did worry about the possible stress it could give Jude,, so when he moved and kicked it was a huge relief for you
‘Those are strong,’ he says.
‘I know,’ you reply, ‘it kind of hurts.’
‘You hear that, Jude? Stop hurting your mother.’
‘It’s okay,’ you mutter, ‘it’s better than nothing.’
You then let out a giant yawn, leaning back against the pillows with the tears of your yawn gathering in your eyes.
‘I think we’re going to head to bed now,’ Johnny says, letting out a massive yawn of his own, ‘all this travelling has taken a lot out of us. But we love you Judey, this if all for you. Goodnight.’
It’s three weeks later, and you’re sitting on the bathroom floor clinging to your stomach.
‘I know,’ Johnny tries to comfort you, stroking your hair as you’re nearly crying in his chest.
Johnny’s mother enters the room, ‘I’ve called the midwife, she’s on her way now…. How far apart are your contractions?’
‘You’re getting quite close now,’ his mom remarks as you whine.
You’d woken up in such horrific pain, and after a few minutes of laying in bed you’d come to the conclusion that they were contractions.
‘John can you turn that camera off, please?’ You whimper, slightly embarrassed at the thought of you writhing and crying on the floor being on tape forever.
It’s clearly several hours later when Johnny picks up the camera again. He’s sitting on the couch, with no shirt on at all.
‘Im very overwhelmed right now… you’re probably going to be here within the next two hours… your mom is about nine centimetres… getting ready to go in this pool-‘
He turns the camera around to show the birthing pool in the middle of the living room.
‘I’m going to get in that, with your mom and then you’ll be in this world with us… I’m terrified, but… optimistic.’
Johnny’s mother turns on the camera next, facing you in the water.
You’re standing between Johnny’s legs, back pressed up against his chest.
‘How’re you feeling, Y/N?’ She asks, and you stare into the lens with half-lidded eyes.
‘I’m in agony,’ you say flatly, ‘it’s like I can feel him. Sitting like… here.’ You point to your pelvis, and Johnny kisses the back of your head comfortingly.
A few moments later, a huge contraction crashes over you, causing you to practically scream
‘Oh god, I have to push-‘
‘Oh my god…’ you gasp, staring at the wailing baby on your chest.
The camera is being held again by Johnny’s mother, just above your head.
‘Look at him John… he’s so perfect.’
’So beautiful,’ he hums, completely lost for words.
Hi, Jude…’ you cry quietly, ‘we love you so so so much…’
