Well, ok. I see what's going on here. I'm two people. Really I'm many people. We all are. But for the sake of Facebook, I'll just say two. Having pushed some people away with my insecurity defenses or just blunt and forthright opinions, combined with not performing, of course I have no support system and can't manage anything. Of course shit is gonna be fucked up. The stars aren't aligned as I thought they were and now I need to get people's attention for the sake of not giving up. Though I'm not in therapy, I find other therapies to help me get through these struggles. I don't wanna be famous to be famous. I don't want to be a TV personality. It's really hard managing your art and your artiste, when you also just have to be you in a world now where we all have some type of 'public profile' to maintain. And I want to make a public apology to any who may feel they have been pushed away by this, even if you haven't, it's a good read, can't we agree?
So if you've gotten this far, I just wanna say. I wrote my song 'Junkie Pop' about myself as a struggling artist. It's also about where I grew up. I'm using cheeky lyrics to talk about dealing drugs, but also me selling myself, my music, my art. "Get em hooked on it" "Riding the dragon" etc... I wrote the chorus in 2007. I started working on the music for it probably a little earlier, but around the same time. Unfortunately my van was robbed in 2010 and with it went my external hard drive with ALL the music I had ever written up to that point. I figured that the idea of "junkie pop" which really is my brand of lifestyle, was all done. Throw it out the window. Leave it in the past. Move on. The problem is, when I have a good idea, I don't wanna let it go to waste. In January of this year I worked on music to a song with engineer/producer Warren Babson at Bang-a-Song studios in Gloucester. It was upon finishing the skeleton of the beat that Junkie Pop had made its way back into my life. Or had it ever even left? The chorus I had written years before rung loud in my head and I was now ready to form the body of work that is my Junkie Pop EP. Now I don't know who is listening to my music or not, but I have been handling some shitty circumstances rather well as of late and I will not give up on what it is that I left Gloucester 10 years ago to go do. I know it seems all too simple. But having grown up the way I did, in the town I did, with the family I did, it sometimes takes a little longer to get where you would have liked to had seen yourself at 25. Good thing I still have a year left before that.
