#kamari3thoughts

[kamari3]

This is a vent post.

I saw this post about wanting to bring back the energy and vibes and community that was in the 2016 era of the UTMV community. And at first I was elated. I joined the fandom in 2017 and I look back fondly on the community I found myself in. Lots of fanfic comments. Lots of RP Roleplays. Lots of Askblog activity and in-character answers and all these wonderful things.

Yes, there were toxic and mean things too. There always are. But I never really found myself in any of it. I only remember the fun and the joy.

And I initially reblogged that post excitedly responding to it. And I went to the blog to see if they posted anything else good.

And I saw their DNI. "Proship DNI".

Their pinned post literally said to me "hey disclaimer just so you know 'i dont support harassment', but if you (also) dont support harassment, if you enjoy shipping, if you think censorship is bad, then don't talk to me because I think youre a terrible person and deserve being harassed."

And they wonder why the 2016 era of UTMV died.

I would have loved to interact. I would have loved to gush about AUs and fanworks and art. But that person left a big sign saying they think I deserve hate for enjoying fiction and that they dont want to talk to me.

Like. Bro. That is kinda the reason youre not getting 2016 UTMV back. You dont wanna associate with "nasty proship" people. Who uh. sorta made UTMV. UTMV (and lets face it, fandom in general) was built on the backs of Proshippers. (although that is sort of an anachronistic statement -- the idea of "proshipping" is new because it was the default, expected political stance. it wasnt "proship vs anti", it was "everyone (aka proship) vs trolls and haters (aka anti)") Then a bunch of haters started being nasty to frans and papyra and fontcest shippers, and puritanical rhetoric ripped apart what was left of the fandom after art theft and the tumblr purge drove the artists away.

The fandom isnt going to knit itself back together unless we foster a community mindset, which we can only do if we all agree to ship-and-let-ship. Block and mute tags you dont like, learn to recognize when an AU isnt for you, and dont play in tags you dont actually like.

But like, just because I like the color Green doesnt mean I cant appreciate Blue or Red. You can hate Green all you want but alienating Green likers is just going to make it harder to live in a society where nobody is making you like Green.

I dunno I just feel like its not fair to ask for a community effort and simultaneously condemn the very people who would have been part of your community for not being good enough for you. It's mean spirited. It's rude. It's cruel.

I want 2017 UTMV back. I would be more than happy to get to see 2016 UTMV with my own eyes. But it isnt coming back, because it takes people to make a community and nobody wants to make a community welcoming and safe.

[kamari3]

lifehack :: you dont have to block someone, you can just filter their username.

[kamari3]

401 of this is me booping just a single mutual. YOU are the button @biryu13 YOU ARE THE BUTTON NOW MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH- *coughhackwheeze*

[kamari3]

I made 3 phonecalls today to my representatives in order to oppose censorship of the internet. It's my Constitutional right as a USAmerican to yell really loud about government policy I don't approve of.

I do not approve of internet censorship, criminalization of anything LGBT+, or criminalization of Sex Work. I don't agree that censorship or destroying end-to-end encryption will protect children online, and in fact I think it will make online spaces worse for them.

I also don't agree that telecommunications policies should be centered around children in the first place, since adults use the internet too.

I used <https://www.badinternetbills.com/> to do my yelling today, and you can too!

Bad Internet Bills

All of the bad internet bills. One website.

[kamari3]

i cant tell if these gofundme things are bots or not. im not very happy about having my compassion for other people weaponized for scams. but i also dont wanna do nothing when someone is suffering. this is frustrating

[kamari3]

Another Vent Post

(typed this on my phone)

I just saw someone else on twitter say what I wanted to say so I'm gonna say it too.

It really makes me uncomfortable when people say "i'm not proship but i'm not anti: i'm normal." Because what I internalize from that is that you aren't willing to stand in solidarity with me.

At best, it means you dont have the energy or time to engage in activism and you want to curate you experience to avoid as much drama/conflict as possibe. i get that. the way you said it made me feel unsafe, and if i were a little less wise i would immediately interpret the statement as you saying you also want to hurt me, but i get it.

you dont have to get into fights you dont want to. you have every right to curate your experience no matter what side of the issue you fall on, and i will support you doing so 100%. no exceptions. no matter how upset i get, this fact does not change.

But you saying that could also mean you do also want me dead and just dont have the time or energy to shoot me yourself.

Yes, I get that it's cringe to have convictions about internet things. but this isnt dying on a hill about how fuckable you think hatsune miku is. this is about whether or not you are willing to support your community.

and whether you like it or not, the internet is also a community you are taking part of. you are literally here.

Like. Bro.

What do you even mean by "i'm not proship or anti, the whole thing is stupid"?

Do you mean it's stupid to have an opinion about how you treat other people?

Do you mean it is stupid to have an opinion about freedom of speech and censorship?

Are you trying to make me ashamed for caring about a political issue just because it most prominently affects online communities, and the farther reaching implications and impacts on these stances aren't obvious and dont use the same jargon?

(surely you know that the proship/anti issue runs parallel to the democrat/republican issue, and the anti-authoritarian/authoritarian issue. surely you know it also runs parallel with the queer/bigotry issue, since it uses all the same arguments and rhetoric. and the sex-work/puritanical issue. and the trans/transphobia issue. surely you understand that just because these political stances have nuances, differences of purpose and circumstance and vocabulary, doesnt mean they arent interconnected. they all still have threads of commonality and logic that interconnect them in parody and parallel. surely you get that the underlying root problem is a difference of ethics thats permeates nearly every polar difference of opinion and that talking about one leads to talking about all of them. surely you understand that these are nearly the same words in different languages and cultures-)

Do you actually mean, "i also think all you nasty proshippers are morally bankrupt and i hope you all die, but i dont have the energy to be a political activist so i will just let the ones that do rip you apart while i watch?"

Do you mean, "i also think that thought policing is wrong and that we shouldn't be judged for or treated badly for our fantasy/fiction indulgences, but i just dont think that it is worth getting into a fight over, and therefor i will not help you when other people harass and abuse you over fiction?"

i understand the idea of wanting to curate which labels you identify yourself with. you dont have to use the labels of proship or anti if those arent for you. but declaring the argument stupid or that anyone who has strong stances on it "needs to touch grass" only does harm. you arent making it clear whose side you are on. and while it sucks that there are sides to pick in the first place, that doesnt change that the sides are there and the fence is up.

and i'm not sorry to say that i trust someone who picks the side of the fence that wants to protect my person and my agency and my freedoms a lot more than someone who thinks me arguing my right to those is stupid.

idk maybe it IS terminally online to think controlling other people's fiction and personal life choices is bad. maybe it IS terminally online to say queers deserve to enjoy their media and representation too. maybe it IS terminally online to say "hey, maybe we shouldnt tell people their intrusive thoughts make them bad people". maybe it IS terminally online to say adults deserve the agency to be able to consent to whatever sex they want with other consenting adults, and that includes fictional sex acts they read, write, draw, and look at drawings of (wherein the artist consented to share the work, and the consumer has the agency to choose whether they view it or not, and change that at any time).

i dont think it is. but i'm just one person who has loud annoying opinions.

[kamari3]

seeing haiku bot on my dash reminds me that art is beautiful

the whimsy of a program that counts syllables brings me joy, somehow

[kamari3]

dont mind me. apparently when i am lonely i go diving for underlust fanart to spam my blog with. i am a simple bitch with simple pleasures and one of those pleasures is Lust!Sans

beloved sugar boi. handsome. powerful. criminally depressed. made of rizz and self loathing. i love him <3