@valiantxunion
"I KNEW this was gonna happen! I KNEW it and yet, I did it anyway. You'd think I was INSANE." Being that he followed through with the same decisions even though he KNEW what the hell that result was gonna be.
Now he was being chased by soldiers. Or guards or whatever the hell the local authorities were.
Only he could have an argument with himself while on the run. Mostly because it seemed to perpetually be the rotation of his daily life. He didn't think that he could get through an hour without doing something stupid.
Like back in his younger years. Guess an old dog couldn't learn new tricks after all. The offense today was similar to what it always happened to be.
Food.
That's right.
"Because I can't help but follow my stomach. How can I help it?? Fucking lay out a pie like that.... What the actual hell. It's like in the stories." The smells were delicious, delectable, even, it turned his stomach into an opera singer, bellowing out whale songs to anyone who stopped to listen.
What is that majestic sound!
He didn't even get anything for his trouble!
"Guess I'm just gonna need to be salted, mummified, turned into a husk with all the dried shit I have to eat." He groaned, ducking down in some sort of drainage... hole. Wonderful. It wasn't the lowest place he'd ever tried to hide. It also wasn't big enough to shield him from view. He only hoped he'd actually lost them and they weren't just hot on his heels about to overwhelm him.
He lay like a dead man. They wouldn't give two craps about a dead man. But a man with a pie? Hell no, not in their town!
