Too late (Junpei fanfiction- angst)- for Kayfie
Well, this is for Kayfie. She wanted an angst fanfic, and I recall we had a conversation about, well, voltage. And I wanted to try angst. Sorry if it’s not really angst-y. 1st time, so forgive me! Enjoy!
Maralina slowly walked down the corridor, each footstep echoing in the empty hallway. It sounded loud and foreign. Almost intrusive of the quiet aura in the corridor. She slowly walked down the lane, as though she was walking to her execution site. She was praying that the walk would never end, but she arrived at her destination all too soon. She looked up at the sign and placed her hand on the ice-cold handle, only to draw it back as though she had been burned. She knew full well what lay behind those cold doors. She knew it very well, but could not bring herself to accept it. She did not want to see, to accept. Yet half of her knew she had to. It would be wrong of her to not see him for the last time. After all he had done for her. After all the times she had failed him countless times. This was the very least she could do for him. She hesitantly, slowly, placed her shaking hand onto the door handle, and gently opened the door. The door creaked ominously, throwing light into the dimly lit room. She drew a shaky breath, and walked in, her low heels clacking against the metal floor, causing a booming sound to echo within the room, making her cringe internally. She shakily walked to the center of the room, where a sheet was covering his body.
She bit her lip, trying to control her raging emotions. It was all she could do to not break down at that moment. With trembling hands, she carefully peeled back the sheet to expose his face. He looked so at peace. She softly traced his face with the very tip of her index finger. There was a trace of a slight smile on his face. It looked as though he was sleeping. But he wasn’t. His face was ice cold. His warm hand, which she had so often pushed away, was now stone cold. He was truly gone, never to return. Never to flash her that warm smile, that could make her feel safe. He was gone, and it was all her fault. The realization proved too much for her to handle, and she collapsed onto the floor, her hands clasped against her mouth to muffle the choking sounds she was making. Tears poured down her eyes, and she buried her face in her hands. Her cold demeanor was lost, and all that was left behind was a person grieving. Grieving for him. Grieving for the fact that his death was all her fault. If only she had abandoned her quest. If only she had kept her promise. If only she was more strong in her determination. If only she had hurried. If only… If only… There were so many things she could have done that would have ensured his survival. She had failed him. The operation was a failure. She could not save him. “I am so sorry Junpei. I am so so sorry,” She wept. She never got the chance to tell him she loved him. She never got the chance to make him laugh. She never had the chance to spend time with him on a date. It was all because she stubbornly clung to her revenge. He had tried to stop her, but she ignored him, and broke her promise. She acted rashly, and because of her, the Director had stabbed him by mistake. The guilt and heartbreak she felt was worse than when her mother died. Only this time, it was not through a medical error that he died. She was the cause. She was the reason. And she could not save him when he most needed it. She had failed at the operation. His heart gave out, and no matter what she did, she could not find a way to get his heart pumping again. She stayed at that position, not knowing how much time had passed. She had turned numb. Her shoulders were shaking as she fought to control herself. After what felt like an eternity, her tears finally stopped. She slowly stood up; ignoring the cramps her legs were shooting up after being in the same position for a long time. Looking at his face again, she slowly cupped his cheek, and bending down, pressed a kiss to his ice-cold lips. Their first kiss, but he would never know.
“Thank you. I love you forever,” She whispered.
In case you’re wondering, Maralina is just a variant for Mara, which means death. It’s like Naomi’s name from the bible, and tech means grief after losing your loved ones, especially husbands. Although this is more boyfriend, it’s quite meaningful.
Also, I chose Junpei cause his route was one where he literally nearly died. And I just chose to imagine if they could not save him. And there's not really that many KoR fanfic :P
