#kazadr stuff

[shadowofthelamp]

Dib's in a panic cause "how is this even scientifically possible? We're two vastly different species and we didn't even have-" then a little lightbulb in his brain clicks off and he's grabbing Keef by his arms "WHAT DID YOU DO"

“I didn’t do anything! I mean, we kissed sometimes, but you guys kiss sometimes too, and you kissed me, so that can’t be it-”

“I’M NOT READY TO BE A DAD, I HAVE SO MANY PERSONAL ISSUES!”

Keef just awkwardly pats Dib’s back as much as he can with his held arms before sagely saying “We all have personal issues, Dib.”

[shadowofthelamp]

Feral kazadr date scenarios?

-Cryptid hunting, particularly when Keef somehow manages to talk a werewolf down from attacking them and gets his number as soon as he turns back to normal.

-Group painting at the community center. They’re given a month-long ban after Zim sets the instructor on fire because his turned out terrible.

-The fair! Zim pukes after going on like 2 rides and tries to shoot the offending ones, Dib and Keef pacify him by trying to win him one of those huge stuffed animals. Dib figures out it’s rigged, but Keef somehow has the upper-arm strength to win anyway. Zim carries his giant monkey around the rest of the night and probably a day or two after.

-Space dates! They visit nearby planets and Zim gets a kick of seeing how excited the humans are to just bounce around in low-gravity. Keef takes so many pictures. He’s got a scrapbook going.

[shadowofthelamp]

Mental image of the day: Zim on Keef’s shoulders in order to kiss Dib standing up.

Bonus: Dib gets cornered against the wall and Keef’s got his hands on either side of him so he can’t squirm out before Zim leans down to kiss him.

[shadowofthelamp]

Keef, by the way, is still... Keef-ish. He still probably breaks into Dib’s room at 3am just to show him a cute cat meme or somehow manages to get into the Voot when Zim was going to visit somewhere off-planet and pops up to ask where they’re going, and often he just seemed to randomly materialize behind Zim or Dib when they’re working on something, even if they didn’t know he was in the building. The difference is that it’s just... sort of expected, at this point. 

The fun thing about Kazadr, to me, isn’t downplaying Keef’s weirdness, it’s having it accent and amp up Dib and Zim’s own obsessive tendancies.

They all play off of each other in an echo chamber of codependent and weird behavior. Dib knows, on some level, that this isn’t normal- he was always able to excuse his stalking of Zim by ‘this is all necessary information to save the Earth!’ but Keef is just... going through his trash to see if he threw out anything that Keef thinks he should keep. Still, when he tries to call him out for it, Keef just grins and points to Dib’s ‘proof closet’ full of stuff that Dib got while rummaging through ZIM’S garbage. He can’t say it’s weird when he’s been doing the same for years, and no one’s really getting hurt, right? It’s how Keef shows affection, he legitimately doesn’t mean anything by just randomly showing up and wanting to be a part of what the other two are doing.  It’s just how he shows he wants to be a part of their lives, and they just start inviting him along so he’s included.

They do eventually set down SOME boundaries (like ‘not between 2-7am’ and ‘text us when you’re on your way’, and even briefly joked about getting Keef a cat bell collar) but they kind of fade as the relationship goes on. Dib already shows up at Zim’s house at all hours, and sometimes, he does it at Keef’s house too if he wants to talk and doesn’t want frustration to bubble over at Zim since Keef’s a way better listener.

None of them really have many other friends,  so they end up each other’s main supports. Keef threw himself under the bus a couple of times to get in the middle when he thought they were angry with each other, but they’re just kinda.... like that, bickering is just how they communicate, and eventually he realizes that it’s only a problem if they aren’t back in the same room in an hour or two. It’s actually kind of bizarre for both of them to have Keef be really affirming and positive since they’re not used to that, and it probably helps them with communication some because he’s so open.

Back to the point, though, Keef ends up obsessive when it comes to learning about both of them and what makes them happy, and in return, both of them (Dib especially) start digging into Keef’s past too to try and return the favor. They all also just kinda.... get clingy? Dib isn’t a really touchy-feely guy, at least not until he gets used to having Keef draped across his lap or snuggled against him while he’s reading, and then he can’t get enough. He’s used to being physical (physically violent, that is, and trying to map his anatomy) with Zim, but it just translated to them being fine being all in each other’s personal space until they both got used to the idea of actual cuddling and now don’t like spending much time without each other.

Keef does stuff like make a necklace out of Dib’s baby teeth that he found in the basement of his house, and the other two just get so used to his attempts at affection that Zim just asks if he can have it to hang up in Dib’s guest room down in the basement.

[shadowofthelamp]

Update: I kind of ship KaZaDr now. Dumping my thoughts about how to make it work/how I think the dynamics would kinda shake out under the cut. Writing those posts about Keef earlier made it ‘click’ in a way seeing fanart didn’t.

I'm trying to figure out how it'd get from the 'god this guy is annoying' point to 'wait I kinda get him' to the 'shit, shit, feelings?????' point. I feel like any getting-together scenario in a canon-ish environment would probs start with Zim and Dib already being together and purposefully trying to dick with Keef who allows himself to get strung along because he's just happy to be a part of things before they start feeling bad for him.

Like.... these two are assholes. They love each other but they're kinda jerky to everybody else, especially someone they have mutual distaste for. Keef's desire to chase after them would probably have him go along with anything if he got to get closer in the process. More than likely it just ends up in things being stretched to a breaking point as they see how far he’ll go to please them because it’s funny, and Keef is eventually angry he's being taken completely for granted because he sees how they treat each OTHER and it's frustrating. (They're still kinda jerks to each other, but it's in an affectionate way, and he doesn’t get what he’s doing wrong to not get to be part of that.)

They realize they actually do miss him when he storms off and have to admit they messed up, and when they make up they get the chance to actually all talk and it's kind of a relief to clear the air, and things go a little smoother after that. 

They take him out for coffee. It is really awkward, since neither Zim or Dib is used to apologizing. Keef's a forgiving guy, though, especially with them, and when he starts opening up (which he does really, really easily, he thinks it'll get them to like him if he just tells the truth) Dib feels bad about pushing someone who was just desperate for any kind of attention- he knows how that feels, and although Zim won’t admit it, he does too. Zim thinks that being alone is normal and it’s kind of weak to want affection, that's how training goes, but Dib smacks him and mumbles out an apology. After that, Keef shows up more again. Gir got really attached to him, so not having him bawl that Keef is gone is good. It's actually kind of nice having an upbeat presence around that ISN'T Gir.

Trying to figure out how each dynamic works... I obviously know how Zadr does, but Kadr and Kazr? (Is that it? Is it Zakr? Gah, dumb shipping system.) Hmm. Dib/Keef is obviously a sunshine/grumpy dynamic, but they could understand how the other is outcast from a specifically human perspective. Keef could be the attentive ear Dib needs, while Dib could give him attention back that he needs too. Dib also has control/possessiveness issues, so honestly, when all of them get together it's just clingy x100. I don't think Keef would really mind as long as they like him- he's getting positive interactions now, and goodness knows he has boundary issues of his own. Having someone around to be positive would be great for Dib.

Zim and Keef... There could be the 'positive attention/validation' thing here too, but I think he'd benefit from someone who's just genuinely cheering for him. Dib's sort of sardonic even though he admires Zim, so having unfiltered praise, while boosting his ego, could be something he didn't realize he had to always make up for himself until he got it freely. Keef, meanwhile, idolizes Zim- getting Zim clingy and possessive/affectionate to him is really all he'd want, going from no one to two people who would now Die For Him. It's a lot, but a good sort of ‘a lot’.

[shadowofthelamp]

There’s like a pza and dibpit thing isn’t there? How do they react to finding out there’s a kazadr universe?

Every other Zim and Dib, simultaneously: 

[shadowofthelamp]

I feel like Keef and Zim would team up to make Dib take a bath.

Probably! Keef can typically handle it longer than Zim can, but when Zim’s feeling particularly affectionate, he kind of likes the Dib-stink as long as it isn’t covered with grime-stink. Going a few days without bathing isn’t that bad when he’s in those moods, but any more than that and it becomes more greasy than pheromonal and it’s back to being gross.

Keef lures him down by enticing him with exploring the base without Zim/showing him something cool he’s found, Zim tackles him and ties him up to drag him to the actual tub.

(They’re going through way too much effort, by the way. Just promising to wash his hair is all he really needs. He likes them doing it, particularly Keef because he doesn’t have claws.)

[shadowofthelamp]

Keef being excessively positive “turn that frown upside down!” And Dib just stares at him in silence for a comedically long amount of time

“If you really want to see that, I can probably snap my neck if I turn my head far enough.”

“Geez, you’re really a downer, huh?”