#kellie talks

[tobidei]

bro I can’t stop thinking about the movie obsession like, the horror of Nikki’s life….

Plus the absolute APATHY bear has for the consequences of his wish, he just sees her as girlfriend placeholder like SO MANY MEN DO because they can like a persons personality but if deep down all they really want is a fuck toy, they’ll disregard you, your wants, your needs, and autonomy to fuck you. Even if it’s hurting you, because his needs are more important than yours, of course! How can we forget our place as women!! :)

Fucking asshole fails every opportunity to fix his mistake and creates so much collateral damage to his friends… I have a modicum of sympathy for when he makes his wish bc who would think that would work, he was having a pity party, but every decision after that night was him digging the hole in deeper for Nikki. That poor girl. I can’t stop thinking about how cruel her situation is. And to top it all off when she’s begging him to kill her, he has the fucking audacity to be OFFENDED LIKE!!! “Boo hoo is it so bad to be with me :( “ when his ass can see she’s SUFFERING… because of HIS actions…

I can’t, this guy is such a pussy 😭 like I don’t say that lightly but like he’s so absorbed in his wants that he doesn’t care what happens to anyone else around him, and even when he tries to off himself, it’s NOT to save Nikki, it’s to end the HARASSMENT, the fucked up behavior that he caused with his wish. and then he tries to puke it all back up because even the ‘cowardly’ way out he can’t even commit to. I’m …

yall this movie is great to think about if you love analyzing film, stories, and visual media, there’s so much to think about

[gaypasta]

ok zukka capture/prisoner fic but Uno Reverse! zuko is held prisoner by the Water Tribe. thank youu for coming to my ted talk

[followtheclick]

idk why every generation thinks that their music is the best... like current music may not be your cup of tea, but your music probably wasn’t your parents' cup of tea either???

[murdergirlart]

THANK YOU SO MUCH

I just hit 100 followers, I’m so happy!! TT o TT I really appreciate the follows, you guys!! Super rad!!!

[tobidei]

it’s really scary sometimes how much you find yourself self censoring literally every part of yourself, and when someone dares to crack a chip in it, it’s like a fucking dam breaking

I have a hard time (end of sentence lol) stating things that I want, enjoy, etc, because it was always used as leverage against me or as punishment, so now instead of being open and declaring what I want, I’m stuck in the body of a 30+ year old who dances around what she wants instead of saying it directly. I gotta fix that, yknow? indirect communication is a fine tool when you’re a child and cannot meet your own needs, but as a big ol adult…. 🤧

I met a bunch of new people yesterday and basically played truth or dare for half the day, and in the back of my mind I could hear and watch how I was constantly trying to talk like I was walking on eggshells, very meek and mild until I wasn’t. Until I felt safe!

half of the time it was bitching about a collective person we all worked for in some capacity (literally it was like a drug talking shit about this person with everyone cause they were actively horrible) and all I could think of was “oh I used to do that.” “Oh huh, that sounds like something someone would do if they were in fear mode.” Basically, this person is operating at 100% all the time and is indirect communicator queen. And it just made me … feel weirdly inspired?

Idk, this person is getting all the flak they deserve but in my brain I’m like, “hey this sounds super sad?” and I found that I was brave enough to say that to them, and they agreed. it is super sad! but I wasn’t even going to mention how or why I could see that, but instead of people rushing to defend their ire, they agreed with me . It was a small validation, (validate my existence pleaaaase 🤤) and felt really good to be open in that way. b&w thinking who??? Siddown…. 👇😤🪑 the grey is speaking

It was such a fun, safe group, so many women of so many different ages, so many theater kids 😌 good people to learn and grow with imo

I’m still not the best communicator (mental eelness) & I’m doing my fuuuuckin best rn, but it’s kinda nice to be able to recognize that. Like, actively see my flaws in someone else and also myself. And now I can do something with it! To fix it of course. 💅 we love actionable tasks

[tobidei]

today was my first day as an art director :) yippee!!

[tobidei]

also while I’m awake

it irritates me so much when people feel like they need to put me down in front of others. To what, feel good about yourself?

I went to the hardware store this weekend with a friend and I stopped to look at a unique houseplant near the entrance, cause I’ve never seen a black houseplant and I was interested. This person stops, tries to berate me for “getting distracted” and then looks at the front door person and says out loud “hahaha I can’t take her anywhere” and then is annoyingly negative the entire time

am I too sensitive? I’m trying to understand the motivation and reason behind wanting to put me down for trying to look at a plant. I’m not meaning to overthink here (lol) but this interaction is bothering me. This person has shown before many times that they view me as lesser, despite being kind and loving. They talk down to me and try to explain to me simple concepts, like I’m a child. I know I’ve been difficult in the past, but there has to be room for growth yes? Especially since this isn’t the first time I’ve brought this problem up.

This is the part of life I have trouble with. How do I tell someone over and over again “stop treating me like an idiot or a child.” I used to feign stupid a lot when either I didn’t feel like engaging with what’s been said or if I was feeling lazy (‘these ppl could never understand’) I’ve changed a lot, and I think it’s taking a while for people around me to catch up, but it’s immensely frustrating when I just want to be treated well. I thought that was the bare minimum?

Blegh

I’m just tired of this circle of behavior where things that are common sense keep getting explained to me, I say “oh cool, I knew that already but thanks” and then immediately I get snapped and huffed at. THATS the childish behavior, to me.

idk maybe everyone should take 100mg SSRIs and stop being so gd negative all the time , I don’t want to be around it anymore 😭 like chillax scoob

[tobidei]

I’m crying I’ve been writing ch3 for I think a year (fanfiction writer curse struck) and I’m finally writing again but I’m doing that snowballing thing where you’re like “ah this is simple and clean and to the point. However wouldn’t it be interesting if—“ and then you add an extra 5k describing your characters lack of mental fortitude and desperate horniness because that’s why we’re put on earth

anyone else get like that